From Mondays Chronicle.

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Monday, September 14, 2009

(09-13) 19:47 PDT -- Berkeley has finally come up with an answer to the question posed by the annual parade: How Berkeley Can You Be?

The answer is: Very Berkeley - as long as you don't sell beer off the back of floats, toss candy to kids or walk naked down University Avenue.

Those restrictions, plus some unexpected permit fees, ended the 13-year run of the How Berkeley Can You Be? parade and festival, a bacchanalian romp through downtown that featured everything from flame throwers to Nobel laureates to motorized couches.

Daunted by the new restrictions, organizers have decided to cancel the event, slated this year for Sept. 27.

"The city saw a bunch of long-haired people having fun and they said, 'Uh-oh,' " said organizer John Solomon, a retired Berkeley restaurant owner. "They city is being very controlling. They want to turn this into the Solano Stroll."

The parade, started by Solomon and a few friends, was intended to poke fun at Berkeley's famed devotion to political correctness. One popular contingent was called PETA, People Eating Them Animals, in which participants shot Spam into the audience with bazookas, hacked at a pig's head with a chain saw and handed cigarettes to kids, Solomon said.

Another entry featured a flame thrower affixed to a chair on a hydraulic lift, "until the Fire Department freaked out," Solomon said.

Other highlights included the Piedmont Lawn Chair Brigade, a motorized couch ridden by people in bathrobes reading the Sunday newspaper, and a group called Berkeley Dykes, who performed a song and dance about "letting lesbians take over Berkeley and sending the straights to Straightsylvania," said parade organizer Karen Hester.

"It was tongue-in-cheek satire. We really liked to push the envelope," she said. "But it's getting increasingly hard to be creative and have fun in this city. Berkeley's become really kind of an uptight place."

The event cost about $25,000 to stage every year, and the city gave organizers an annual grant of $10,000 to help offset costs. But last year costs ran higher than expected because the event ran past the permitted hours, said city spokeswoman Mary Kay Clunies-Ross.

"The event has gotten larger and requires more planning to keep it safe and fun and not adversely affect the neighborhoods," she said. "They decided not to have the event this year, and that's all we know."

Alcohol was the primary point of disagreement between the city and parade organizers. A few years ago the city banned alcohol at festivals unless it was sold in a roped-off area staffed by police. Alcohol sales at the parade plummeted from about $5,000 to $1,000, because "who wants to sit inside this pen with police while you drink a beer?" Hester said.

"One of the marching bands likes to drink beer. They said they're not going to come if they can't," Solomon said. "I don't get it. What's wrong with drinking beer at a parade?"

Meanwhile, the city cracked down on participants throwing candy to kids because children running in the street posed a safety hazard. Nudity and flame throwing were also not high on the city's list of acceptable public behavior.

"We look forward to them having the parade back next year," said Clunies-Ross. "Hopefully they'll have had more time to plan for a safe, fun event where you can send your kids."