I thought this was about being gay but not "gay"

You guys with ur slave-ish devotion to labels......... How limiting....


What makes duck hunting, etc so fucking studly, anyway....?? Going up against an animal 400 times smaller, with a god- damn GUN is a REAL show of MANHOOD, oh YEAH.....

What fucking antiquated, out-dated, superficial ideas of what being a MAN/STUD is......

Sorry... not to jump down ur throat, D... But seriously....there is- as Jona so well pointed out- SO much pain, hate, fear, and unfairness passed round because of peoples subconscious disregard for others who are different them them.....
SO sad wh much of peoples discontent is cause by their OWN prejudiced, bullshyt......


Sorry about the rant... u hit a nevre... i HATE narrow limited thinking....

I don't know about the Bay Area thing but out here in the real world there are MANY gay men who are just regular-type guys who do regular-type guy stuff. I am one of those regular-type guys who just changed my oil and filter today and worked on my truck. I go fishing, sometimes Pheasant hunting. I like to go hiking up at Lassen Volcanic Nat'l Park about 30 mins East of here. I wear Levi's 501's, boots, T-shirts or Western-type shirts and I just bought two Dickies work shirts yesterday cuz I like that type of shirt. Being gay doesn't mean anything really, either you're a regular-type of guy or you're not, it's not something that can be faked, no matter how much leather or other "butch" clothing you wear. I think that the biggest problem that the "gay community" has is the idea that we're somehow "special" or "unique" and apart from the "regular guy" crowd. Being gay has nothing to do with my masculinity other than enhancing that masculinity in a way. I do not judge other gay men for dressing in drag or acting bitchy and "gay", you know what I mean, it's their thing, but it sure ain't for me. I like to play pool, cards, have a few beers with a pepperoni and olive pizza or a couple of Jack Daniel's and Cokes with my friends, most of whom are straight. I live in a conservative and religious area with lots of cowboys and ranchers. The only people who know I'm gay are those that I confide in, the rest are just acqaintances of mine who have no business knowing I'm gay, it's just not part of everyday communication and I'm fine with that. I find that people who insist on making everyone around them know that they're "gay" are really tactless and confrontational, it really isn't anyone else's business other than close friends and family. How many guys walk up to you and say "Hey, my name is ********** and I'm gay?" It's more information than most people want to hear. Nobody really wants to hear about your sexuality, they only care if you're a nice guy or whatever. If that makes me some kind of "closeted" gay man then I guess I can't say anything more about it. To me, "being in the closet" pertains to a PERSONAL acceptance, or non-acceptance of one's sexuality. Many of the "in your face" gay crowd do more damage to the acceptance of gays than anything. It is a personal matter and should stay that way, even if you feel better by lecturing people on your sexual preferences and practices. If you're a guy you should behave like a guy, at least that's the way I feel about it. But I have always had a masculine self-image and find that being gay means that I appreciate masculinity in myself and others, no matter what their 'preferences" are. I'm sure that I'll be raked over the coals by the P.C. crowd, but that's just how I feel personally. I can never really understand why a man who likes other men would want to act, dress or behave in a feminine manner, unless it is the only way that they can accept themselves and their sexuality, I don't know. I enjoy being a man, I'm glad as hell that I have a penis and balls and really enjoy getting together with another "regular-type" guy for some behind-closed-doors man to man action. Or taking off into the woods and stripping down with a buddy and getting it on in the great outdoors. I'm not saying that everyone should be like me, I'm just saying that, for me, being a "regular-type" guy is who I am inside and outside. I think being in an environment like San Francisco for instance, can influence how guys relate to each other and what is "acceptable" and what isn't, compared to those of us out in the boonies. Just a few thoughts of mine on the topic. Thanks for letting me tell my story. It isn't "stereotypical 'studly' stuff", it's just being who you are. I know so many gay people who say that they don't have any "straight" friends or refer to them as "breeders". What nonsense! And people wonder why many gays aren't accepted in society as a whole. If you want to live in an exclusively gay "ghetto" that's your right, but don't assume that any guy who doesn't feel the same way is "playing" at being butch, etc. Most people are very open to being friendly if you give them the same consideration that you expect from them. Being "gay but not gay" is an everyday thing for me, I'm sure it is for millions of other men in my position as well. Trying to pull them down for being "stereotypical studly" types does nothing but betray a certain mindset that doesn't feel that it is possible to be "gay and not gay". I'm a regular guy with morals and self-respect, I don't feel the need to tell everyone I meet that I'm "gay". It's too much information, nobody wants to hear that shit! Be a man of your word and treat others as you would like to be treated and everything will be fine. Just my own personal opinions, everyone has their own but mine work for me, if you find it "un-gay friendly" then there's nothing more I can say. I enjoy being a just a regular-type guy, just like millions of other "gay" men.

You're supposed to like disco, not rock
You're supposed to spend $50 or more each on skin care products, and in general be a shopaholic
etc. etc..
You're supposed to be clean shaven, groomed, and cologned.

please read this post instead of the one above:
How very interesting. I guess I'll comment now since I recently decided to be more active in this group. Sorry guys I'm not a scholar so go easy on me if you decide to bump heads. It's called "gay but not, gay" and some take this literally where as It probably wasn't intended to be. There does seem to be an obvious split between Gay men whose personality appears to have a 'Royal' vibe to them like a Queen or King would but not always so ridiculous as say a drag queen. And then the other is still gay and usually can still be pin-pointed as someone who is gay but not always only because they don't act like a queen. For the sake of this post I'll categorize these two as Queens and Gays. Sometimes the Gays LOVE the Queens and at other times it is not so. I believe this forum was intended to for those GAYS who seem not able to fundamentally connect with Queens. This is where I stand anyway. I've clubbed a lot in my younger times and dated my fair share and I've continuously been labeled as 'not so gay' or as "being without a gay license". This has always been consistent. None of this bothers me. Queens and I have never been able to understand each another on any level. Casual conversation is even very limited. So here I am, a member of this tribe simply to understand more of this difference.

on a different note, I've seen many comments in this group about shaving pubes...... Let me say that I work at a gym and everyone of all walks of life shave their pubes.