Aw geez guys. I'm sorry if I sounded pompus and arrogant at asking you in the first place. That wasn't my intention at all.
With me I find you learn most about yourself when the negatives are presented to you. People are very quick to tell you your positives. Its the negatives that are more taboo to discuss because of unwillingness to offend. I go there because I like a well rounded perspective of myself. There is always a good and a bad side to everything.

I was just trying to clarify. :( I'm a Aries/Taurus riser. Sometimes I dont' think before I speak :(

"Cancer manipulation tactics..... I know I know. Who the fuck is a Scorpio to talk about manipulation tactics?"

"it seems when they want something there is a "Poor me take care of me" vibe to it. "

"Cancer will turn to very petty aggressive little attacks if the poor me thing isn't working".......

Mel, everything you have identified is on the MARK!
I have Cancer influenced people all around me (father, grandfather, ex LTR-and those are just the sun's......)
but the tactics you are refering to are part of that master manipulation potential they have and although Scorpio influences often read right through that
(not ALL, I do know one who doesn't)....but much of the population do not.

As I see it, we all have traits that have both positive and/or negative quality..

First, Cancers are born with a natural insinct to see and understand what people need (as Ghost girl pointed out).
This is in general what makes them excellent care-givers and why they are associated with "Mother".

Next, being very aware of their own insecurities, they posess infrared-like ability to see others insecurities.
Also a quality that can make them excellent at encouraging/motivating people...

But, immature/unevolved Cancers can and will use those abilities (knowing what people want or what makes them insecure)
to manipulate like crazy...combined with their own inborn insecurities
and "Cancer crazy" is a whole new level of crazy...lol!

And you are right, instead of 'whining and/or pouting indefinately to have someone give them what they want',
a Scorpio WILL just go get it themselves.

but keep in mind...even if they use immature tactics, Cancer's very often DO get people to give them what they want.
They are very tenacious in this respect.
It's that death grip claw...the same one that holds on to grudges.....
when applied to goals can make them ruthless pursuers.
I have watched them whine as if their arms and legs were broken only to turn around to see them sprinting like an olympian to (and capturing) an oportunity that suited them.

I am sure you have witnessed this as well. It doesn't take long to catch on if your'e pay attention. Passive-agressive indeed.

So as for Cancer's being strong...

I still beleive they are. They are just slow in developing that trait into a stregnth.

"I feel like I have to keep my mouth totally shut when it comes to Cancers because no matter WHAT I offend the hell out of them.... that being said I've offended Cancers for keeping my mouth shut!!! Huh? lol I can't win."

You win by continuing to speak your mind. Im a Cancer and you have to hurt our feelings sometimes to get through to us. Im not the one to really bitch and moan about criticizm but that doesn't mean I particulary like it.

"Geez... either let me have it or get over it. Ya know? The whole thing was made into this HUGE drama for nothing. It could have been settled very easily but it got drug out to the point I didn't want to deal with his shit and we just recently started speaking 2 damn years later!!! "

But the point is you still speaking to him lol jk. But really, I agree we can be passive aggressive but so are scorpios. And sometimes in the most devious ways. I feel all water signs are that way. But thats just me.

". I had a Cancer girl (that was a really close friend) try to "steal" my man away from me. It's a long story so I'll spare you but basically it boiled down to HER going to my guy and claiming her BF was bad to her (yeah she was in a serious relationship that she "didn't want to be in but didn't know how to get out of") Yet she didnt want to leave her BF and wanted mine "on the side". She cried to him all the time. He felt bad for her, let her cry to him, and suddenly it turned into *I* was a whore and *I* would cheat on him and she cared about him so much she didn't want him to be with me (for his own good of course). I severed ties right there as did my man. To this day she tells people I'm mean and she doesn't understand why we can't be friends... look past our differences blah blah. No. No. No. Being a water sign I know manipulation when I see it. She pulled the poor me every single time. She still does. "

She has issues. I have known SOME cancer women to be this way. They are extremely jealous women and to be honest me even being a Cancer, I cant deal with that shit lol. I have other things that are of priority.

"One of the last things that rub me the wrong way is how a Cancer will turn to very petty aggressive little attacks if the poor me thing isn't working."


Gotta change it up if your not getting a response to the way you feel haha. But I must concur, it does work for us a majority of the time. See the problem that most people find with this, is that it is extremely annoying, which I cant deny. Personally, I'm not into all that poor me begging and wining nonsense. I can deal with my own problems. It's always nice to have "help" but I if someone acts like they breaking their damn back to do something for me, I'll just cut it off. They're not even worth the time. Not a typical Cancer move if you ask me.

"To me Cancers are those kids that stand there and say " I want I want" cry and pout until someone brings them what they want. As a Scorpio we'd walk over and get it ourselves."

They want to see how much you care about their wants and needs. Mother, who is a Cancer, does the shit all the time. I used to do it when I was in my early teens but that is on the back burner.

"I still have a Cancer friend who is the nicest guy you'll ever meet. He really is quite the catch. His biggest flaw is he needs to grow some balls. "

Cancers have balls when we feel we need to exert or use them. We dont care if you want them hanging out all the damn time lol no pun intended, i guess haha.

"Ok... I hope I didn't offend too bad. I *was* trying to keep it objective. I'd really like to hear what you guys think! If you got some harsh critic have at it! I like it dirty ; ) LOL"

Its fine with me. Because i could do a filibuster on Scorpios, Capricorns, and Gemini's etc if I wanted to. But to be honest. I LOVE Scorpios for simple fact that they are Scorpios haha, Gemini's for being confusing, and Cappy's for being the "father figure" types I could look to for anything.

>
>You guys get offend WAY to easily. Now I realize that Scorps tend to be harsh but I have seriously offended Cancers
>with some of the smallest things. And I mean they were all very "hurt". I feel like I have to keep my mouth totally shut
>when it comes to Cancers because no matter WHAT I offend the hell out of them.... that being said I've offended Cancers
>for keeping my mouth shut!!! Huh? lol I can't win.
>

Sounds like you're dealing with paranoid people. Is that experience exclusive with Cancers only?

Anyway, Linda Goodman did say this:
"It's hard to know when she'll suddenly become vulnerable to hidden meanings. You could waltz in some night and say, "Your hair looks gorgeous," and she'll get a tear in her eye. Why? Because you insinuated her hair looked frightful the last time you saw her. "

Hidden meanings, insinuations.

So good clear communication is key. However, it is almost impossible, time-consuming, and tedious for most people to always have to watch for hidden meanings and insinuations with every word they say... Oftentimes, most people shouldn't have to...

Every sign has its bad traits too and this is one thing that some Crabs need to work on - gain objectivity...
Part of the reason that they overreact stems from feeling too much - Cancers tend to identify too much with their emotions, which can sometimes confuse..... Especially since most of reality is made up of one's own perceptions....

It has been said that Cancers need to learn about "projection,"... (as do Pisceans I guess)...

One other factor to consider is... the Cancer's family... the people whom he/she had grown up with. If that environment is unstable, stultifying, abusive, it is definitely going to drive any sensitive Cancer crazy. You will need to learn more about the Cancer's family, and if there's any indication that they have abused, neglected, abandoned, disrespected the Cancer, then take it as a sign that this Cancer is going to be a mess and that you should tread carefully around them. If you can, just keep quiet and don't say anything about them or their whatever/whomever they hold dear.... It might be best to minimize contact with these types until they have sorted out their issues and healed themselves. But then of course, sometimes conflicts also help people grow... so......


>
>That brings me to my second beef.... once you offend a Cancer it's like they have to keep bring it up
>and trying to guilt trip you into feeling bad.
>

I've seen my mom do that all the time while I was in high school... and she has nothing in Cancer.
I don't think that is solely a Cancer trait....
If someone is addicted to pain and strife (and this is not exclusive to Cancers), they'll do anything to get in trouble again... Consciously or not. You will have to ask yourself why you keep sticking around with them...

>
>Cancer manipulation tactics..... I know I know. Who the fuck is a Scorpio to talk about manipulation tactics? LOL
>Cancers have one and one only (that I've seen) Poor me!! Feel bad for me!!
>

That sounds like someone at his/her wit's ends...
They either just need to educate themselves, or learn to handle their negative emotions.
Oftentimes that's just pure crying for help. Only indulge them if it's worth it, if the problem's really that big... Otherwise, ignore.

>
>I had a Cancer girl (that was a really close friend) try to "steal" my man away from me.
>basically it boiled down to HER going to my guy and claiming her BF was bad to her
>(yeah she was in a serious relationship that she "didn't want to be in but didn't know how to get out of")
>Yet she didnt want to leave her BF and wanted mine "on the side". She cried to him all the time.
>He felt bad for her, let her cry to him, and suddenly it turned into *I* was a whore and *I* would cheat on him
>and she cared about him so much she didn't want him to be with me (for his own good of course).
>


Sounds like a psycho. Probably has adverse Moon/Venus/Pluto aspects or something. You cannot pin it down to just the Cancer Sun. After all, there *are* a lot of awesome genuine Cancer ladies out there.


>
>To me Cancers are those kids that stand there and say " I want I want" cry and pout until someone
>brings them what they want. As a Scorpio we'd walk over and get it ourselves.
>

That's true.
Well some horoscopes say that Cancers are lazy. I think that's what the cying and pouting boils down to.
But if left completely alone (and maybe feeling wounded), they will actually work to get what they want by themselves.

>
>I still have a Cancer friend who is the nicest guy you'll ever meet. He really is quite the catch.
>His biggest flaw is he needs to grow some balls.
>

Reason why I don't date Cancer men.

There was one who was just all over me since the first meeting. So awkward and embarrassing.
When I was too busy to return his messages/calls, he'd ask our mutual friend why I wasn't answering. Then our friend would call me and ask what's up.... What the....

Really... any sick idiot Cancer that you encounter... *simply* has NOT grown up yet.
Do yourself (and them) a favor: just ignore them.

Just stop paying attention to idiots... You'll stumble upon some good Cancers (and other signs) someday.

~~~

Oh yeah and just because I wrote this post does not mean I am a perfectly healthy Cancer.
There's a reason why I was able to explain the craziness.