Most sober men do see more than the 'boys at the bar'. I joined the pagan group because there is usually more interesting people in the group that call themselves pagan, but I have found that pagan means a lot of different things to different people. For me it is not about religion, but rather my lifestyle and understanding of the universe and my place in it. That does not fit with mainstream anything (religion, thought, expectations, etc.).

Often it doesn't fit here either, but at least I am not chastised or belittled. So, I think when people are willing to step away from all the mainstream ideas, no matter what label they put on themselves, they are more open and accepting.