Different standards with being single and being taken

topic posted Tue, June 17, 2008 - 12:35 AM by  Axis
Share/Save/Bookmark
Advertisement
In the past several years it's been interesting to find my standards regarding what I find acceptable when I'm single versus when I'm in a relationship. When I'm single I have no problem flirting with, playing with (in a kink sense or otherwise), groping, snuggling, or even kissing women that show interest to do so (providing I know they will want to keep it casual, too), whereas if I'm in a committed relationship there is none of that with anyone other than my partner. I still generally draw the line at no-strings sex if I'm single, but I've still crossed that line a few times in my life with "friends" that I knew very well beforehand. Generally speaking, however, I try to keep these kinds of activities to a minimum when I'm single to avoid causing misunderstandings and/or drama, not to mention avoiding picking up colds... and such.

Do other people have similar double standards or have gone through similar transformations?
posted by:
Axis
SF Bay Area
Advertisement
Advertisement
  • That is how I was when I was single. I was always a big flirt and dating many guys mainly just for fun...dancing, snuggling, playing but rarely sleeping with them. I don't see it as a double standard though. If there was no commitment there on either side in any way, I think of it as normal single behavior. My monogamy always kicked in when the relationship was serious emotionally. I truly feels like a chemical change in my body and I just am not interested in anyone else when I am in a committed relationship. I might notice attractiveness but there is nothing in me that wants to pursue it.

Recent topics in "alternative monogamists"

Topic Author Replies Last Post
Monogamous Munch? Michael 0 March 29, 2009
Trouble with Monogamy Deez 10 March 29, 2009
Sexual Utopia in Power married 1 March 5, 2009
Navigating Monogamy in a Sea of Poly - A Class Michael 0 March 5, 2009