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Gays in Mayberry

topic posted Mon, October 19, 2009 - 6:09 PM by  Josh
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Over the past few days, one of Mayberry's most prolific posters and comic geniuses extraordinarie, Solari, has been peppering me with taunts suggesting that I am gay and that I am sexually attracted to him.

Seems rather homophobic on his part. I mean, is there supposed to be something wrong with being gay? Is the homophobic punch line to Solari's jokes what makes him think he's such a hoot?

Homphobia went out a few decades ago, but I know Mayberry is forever in the 1960's, so I guess I should not complain.

But statistically, we know at least some of the Mayberry characters had to be gay. So maybe some tolerance is in order.

Can you pick the gay person(s) out of this line up?

Cast of The Andy Griffith Show:

Andy Taylor - Andy Griffith
Opie Taylor - Ron Howard (as Ronny Howard)
Deputy Barney Fife - Don Knotts
Aunt Bee - Frances Bavier
Gomer Pyle - Jim Nabors
Goober Pyle (aka Goober Beasley in early episodes) - George Lindsey
Floyd Lawson - Howard McNear
Helen Crump - Aneta Corsaut
Thelma Lou - Betty Lynn
Howard Sprague - Jack Dodson
Emmett Clark - Paul Hartman
Martha Clark - Mary Lansing - also played at least 4 other characters
Ellie Walker - Elinor Donahue (Andy's first season girlfriend)
Otis Campbell - Hal Smith
Ernest T. Bass(aka George the TV repair man) - Howard Morris
The Darlings
Briscoe Darling - Denver Pyle
Charlene Darling - Maggie Peterson
The Darling Boys - The Dillards
Clara Edwards (aka Clara Johnson, Bertha Johnson) - Hope Summers
Emma Watson (aka Emma Brown)(- Cheerio Meredith
Ben Weaver - Will Wright/Tol Avery (miserly old landlord and department store owner)
Deputy Warren Ferguson - Jack Burns
Mayor Pike - Dick Elliot
Mayor Roy Stoner - Parley Baer
Leon - Clint Howard
Millie Swanson - Arlene Golonka
Rafe Hollister (local farmer and sometime moonshiner) - Jack Prince
Malcolm Merriweather - Bernard Fox
The Fun Girls
Daphne - Jean Carson
Skippy - Joyce Jameson
Peggy McMillan - Joanna Moore (Andy's third season girlfriend)
John Masters - Olan Soule (choir director and hotel manager)
Reverend Tucker - William Keene (pastor of All Souls church)
Johnny Paul Jason - Keith Thibodeaux (Opie's best friend in 12 episodes)
Pressroom office clerk - Susan Coyle
posted by:
Josh
Dallas
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  • Re: Gays in Mayberry

    Mon, October 19, 2009 - 6:15 PM
    Do we have to do this? I like everyone.

    Except for Zombies!!!

    Is that so wrong?

    Just askin' . . .
    • Re: Gays in Mayberry

      Mon, October 19, 2009 - 6:17 PM
      Solari - jewelry maker, quilt collector... gay basher. Snort.
      • Re: Gays in Mayberry

        Mon, October 19, 2009 - 6:20 PM
        I didn't say you are a gay basher, Solari. I suggested you are a homophobe because you think it is funny if a man is gay or sexually attracted to another man. That is the punch line to all your jokes of late.

        As for actual gay bashing, though you are fond of calling me a coward, I don't think you have the courage to talk shit to anyone's face, much less bash anyone. Which is a good thing because we don't need more gay bashers on the loose.
  • Re: Gays in Mayberry

    Mon, October 19, 2009 - 6:48 PM
    "Homphobia went out a few decades ago," It may not be politically correct but homophobs are still alive and well.
    "SIGH" One of my daughters is gay. I pray everyday she never encounters one of those ignorant sons a bitches.
    It's one of my fears.
    • Re: Gays in Mayberry

      Mon, October 19, 2009 - 6:51 PM
      Well then, Sharon, don't invite her to this tribe or any tribe that Solari is a member of, because I can guarantee you he's been showing his homophobia since the day he got here.

      It's there, open your eyes, people.
  • Re: Gays in Mayberry

    Mon, October 19, 2009 - 6:54 PM
    andy and helen are both gay. they are each other's beards. though why helen needs another beard with all of her facial hair is beyond me. howard sprage is ac/dc. we all know about gomer.
    • Re: Gays in Mayberry

      Mon, October 19, 2009 - 6:55 PM
      oh yeah, floyd is into bdsm.
      • Re: Gays in Mayberry

        Mon, October 19, 2009 - 8:22 PM
        i'm here, I'm queer.....get used to it!!
        • Re: Gays in Mayberry

          Mon, October 19, 2009 - 8:27 PM
          "jesus has a cure for gay people, i think it is marijuana"

          so that's why I have no interest in bush?!
          • Re: Gays in Mayberry

            Mon, October 19, 2009 - 8:31 PM
            Bush the plant or bush the female anatomy?
            • Re: Gays in Mayberry

              Mon, October 19, 2009 - 8:49 PM
              Bush the plant makes no sense.
              I'll go with that then!
              • Unsu...
                 

                Re: Gays in Mayberry

                Mon, October 19, 2009 - 9:32 PM
                Goober and Gomer were kissin cousins.

                Otis was in the closet, thats why he drank him self silly, so he could sleep it off while being near to the towns heart throb Andy.

                I do believe Bea lead the local chapter of the "Sewing Circle"
                • Re: Gays in Mayberry

                  Mon, October 19, 2009 - 9:53 PM
                  SCRREEAAAAAMMMMM~! (Real Loud)
                  • This is the maximum depth. Additional responses will not be threaded.

                    Re: Gays in Mayberry

                    Mon, October 19, 2009 - 11:58 PM
                    Howard Sprauge and Floyd the Barber had a hot and heavy thing going for years.
                    Barney caught em on lovers lookout in the backseat of a '48 Dodge,
                    he's kept completely silent about what he saw that fateful night...
                    but honesty, nobody else in town gives half a flip
                    (cept Snert, cause they keep rendevou-ing @ his sanctum under the stairs!).
                    • Finding the Gay Mayberry

                      Tue, October 20, 2009 - 6:18 AM
                      I can vouch for the accuracy of this article at least as regards Eureka Springs which is a little town not far from where I live and which I like to visit to ogle the gays. Snort.


                      www.dallasvoice.com/artman/p...e_303.php
                      • Re: Finding the Gay Mayberry

                        Tue, October 20, 2009 - 6:23 AM
                        Solari copied a link to an article about a gay friendly town in Arkansas as his only evidence to refute that he is a gay-baiting homophobe.

                        He wrote:

                        "I can vouch for the accuracy of this article at least as regards Eureka Springs which is a little town not far from where I live and which I like to visit to ogle the gays. Snort.

                        www.dallasvoice.com/artman/p...e_303.php "

                        The lady doth protest too much, me thinks. Further, there's no mention of Solari in that article.

                        The facts speak for themselves. There are nearly a dozen posts in this tribe alone where Solari thinks it is hilarious to suggest that I am gay and sexually attracted to him. These are not posted in friendly, humorous way. They are angry taunts from him.

                        Next Solari will try to tell us he's not a homophobe, why, some of his best friends are gay. Snort!
                        • Re: Finding the Gay Mayberry

                          Tue, October 20, 2009 - 6:27 AM
                          Homophobes are on the defensive and are losing the culture wars. Same sex marriage is becoming a fact of life and once it becomes legal nation wide it is all over for the bigots. In a free society if you object to homosexuality your one and only option is to not sleep with someone of the same sex.
                          • Re: Finding the Gay Mayberry

                            Tue, October 20, 2009 - 7:35 AM
                            So, despite all of Solari's gay baiting, he claims he's not a homophobe because he "oogles the gays" in Eureka Springs, Arkansas.

                            So if you go look at gays like they are some kind of tourist attraction, then you are redeemed from the otherwise homophobic behavior of your everyday existance?

                            I'm taking a stand against homophobes like Solari. And Aunt Bea is taking a stand against me for taking a stand against the homophobe.

                            Weird.
                            • Re: Finding the Gay Mayberry

                              Tue, October 20, 2009 - 7:40 AM
                              Y'know I once disrespected Aunt Bea in her kitchen,
                              she told me
                              "Pat, you only get five chances with me"
                              she then broke two of my fingers with a meat tenderizer
                              and said "Now, you got four..."

                              Watch out for the meat tenderizer...
                          • Unsu...
                             

                            Re: Finding the Gay Mayberry

                            Tue, October 20, 2009 - 9:24 AM
                            >>Homophobes are on the defensive and are losing the culture wars. Same sex marriage is becoming a fact of life and once it becomes legal nation wide it is all over for the bigots. In a free society if you object to homosexuality your one and only option is to not sleep with someone of the same sex.<<

                            hear hear
                      • Unsu...
                         

                        Re: Finding the Gay Mayberry

                        Tue, October 20, 2009 - 9:22 AM
                        >>I can vouch for the accuracy of this article at least as regards Eureka Springs which is a little town not far from where I live and which I like to visit to ogle the gays. Snort.<<


                        "the gays" ????
                        • Re: Finding the Gay Mayberry

                          Tue, October 20, 2009 - 10:41 AM
                          "The gays" is right. Solari refers to gay people as "the gays." He likes to go to a gay-friendly town to gawk and oogle "the gays."

                          What a champ.
                          • Re: Finding the Gay Mayberry

                            Tue, October 20, 2009 - 3:53 PM
                            You started the thread. The thread which is entitled "Gays in Mayberry". Quite calling the flaming gay kettle black.
                            • Re: Finding the Gay Mayberry

                              Tue, October 20, 2009 - 4:19 PM
                              That was a caption or title. Like the title to a news story. Ever notice how those are short and different from the way we write when we are speaking conversationally? No? Never read a newspaper, I guess.

                              Anyhow, when Solari is speaking conversationally, he refers to gay people as "the gays." When I am speaking conversationally, as opposed to writing the title or caption of a thread, I do not speak that way of gay people.

                              You'll also be hard pressed to find me referring to gay people as some kind of curiosity or object to oogle, like Solari does when he goes and visits Eureka Springs as a tourist, to "oogle the gays" as he wrote.

                              Instead, my point is that Mayberry probably had a lot of gay characters and so this tribe is supposed to be gay friendly and not homophobic, but in the past few days, Solari has repeatedly made homophobic remarks towards me. And not only does this pass without comment or objection from the moderator, but instead, the moderator has seen fit to blame me for Solari's conduct.
                              • Re: Finding the Gay Mayberry

                                Tue, October 20, 2009 - 4:25 PM
                                Leaving to go somewhere you're treated as you feel you deserve by they that meet your standards would be the best revenge.
                                • Re: Finding the Gay Mayberry

                                  Tue, October 20, 2009 - 4:36 PM
                                  "That was a caption or title. Like the title to a news story. Ever notice how those are short and different from the way we write when we are speaking conversationally?"

                                  Mmm...like Faggots to Wed? Dykes Want Equal Rights?

                                  I think I'm getting it.
                          • Unsu...
                             

                            Re: Finding the Gay Mayberry

                            Tue, October 20, 2009 - 9:03 PM
                            I am gay and I have refered to my commrades as "the gays" on occassion. Truthfully i havent read nothing from Solari that I found offensive. Generally in my experience its the one that go on and on about something , similiar to they way you are, that have an axe to grind or something to hide. Not making an accusation. Just my gay experience being shared.
                            • Unsu...
                               

                              Re: Finding the Gay Mayberry

                              Wed, October 21, 2009 - 8:45 AM
                              Sean, please inform me as the proper PC way to speak about gay people. (like I'd give a crap behind the couch to be Politically Correct)
                              Is 'gay' the way or is there some other words I don't know about that are better.
                              Yeah, Ok, Billie Bob is gay. Those dudes over there gays.
                              Here In Madlystoned while growning up all us kids knew who were 'weird' like that and told each other horror stories about what they'd to do to you - the faggots, queers and such. This was in the late '50, early '60s. Then I got to know some and realised they were just people, different somehow, but still people.
                              I be satisfied being str8.
                              I look at what a person does and how they act toward the other poor souls stuck on this marble. A nice person is a nice person and a jerk is an asswhole.
                              Later, I got to make a beer run.
                              "I'll be back."
                              • Re: Finding the Gay Mayberry

                                Wed, October 21, 2009 - 11:26 AM
                                I'm straight, but the Vet cut off my balls.

                                *BIG SIGH*
                                • Re: Finding the Gay Mayberry

                                  Wed, October 21, 2009 - 11:28 AM
                                  Jeffy, I have been studying you. If you are a pit bull/corgi mix how were you conceived without somebody getting killed in the process?
                                  • Re: Finding the Gay Mayberry

                                    Wed, October 21, 2009 - 11:53 AM
                                    I was born on a working ranch in Hollister, California. The ranch owner had a pit bull and corgis. He used the corgis to handle the cattle. I was always waaay out in the back 40, sleepin', relaxin', checkin' things out. I stayed on the perimeter of the property, guardin' the ranch from intruders - between naps and explorations. A relative of the rancher took me to live with him and his family. He was mean to me. He initally let me in the house, but when I got up on the sofa or chairs, his mother-in-law would chase me outside, hitting me under my tail and on the head with the broom (she was a vile bitch). He finally chained me up in the backyard, in the rain and mud. He got a pure bred pit bull pup and it lived inside the house with the family. I sat on the porch in the rain and watched everyone thru the slidin' glass doors have good times in the warm, dry house. I never barked. One day, Phaedra was gardenin' on the other side of the fence and she peeped thru and saw me. She asked the owner if she could have me. He said that would be great cause he was gonna take me to the dog pound next week anyway. She took me home and her son bathed all the dried mud off me and she took me inside and put a blanky on the sofa, invited me up to rest and named me Jeff (my owner before had named me "Snoop" - after Snoop Dog) - Phaedra said Jeff was a better name fit for me. I've been with Phaedra ever since.
                              • Unsu...
                                 

                                Re: Finding the Gay Mayberry

                                Wed, October 21, 2009 - 1:03 PM
                                <<Sean, please inform me as the proper PC way to speak about gay people.>>

                                Generally if you address them as "Your Eminence" you are doing good. I personally like to use the greeting, "Hey Faggot!"

                                <<Politically Correct>>

                                OH GOD, fuck Political Correctness. Its warped a generation of touchy feely holier then though busy bodies.
                                • Unsu...
                                   

                                  Re: Finding the Gay Mayberry

                                  Wed, October 21, 2009 - 1:34 PM
                                  i don't think it's political correctness that makes me prefer that people not
                                  spew racist or homophobic epithets at people or marginalize with language.

                                  yes, people do go overboard with the PC
                                  yes, intent should be considered when certain terminology is used

                                  however

                                  if all were equal in the world i suppose it really wouldn't matter,
                                  but it's not - so it does.
                                  • Unsu...
                                     

                                    Re: Finding the Gay Mayberry

                                    Wed, October 21, 2009 - 1:43 PM
                                    I am just railing the overboardness that has taken hold of the PC movement. It seems to run hand in hand with the "common sense" that has been weened out of our species.
                                    • Re: Finding the Gay Mayberry

                                      Wed, October 21, 2009 - 2:40 PM
                                      Let's make it all equal now. . .where's the chalk board?
                                      • Re: Finding the Gay Mayberry

                                        Wed, October 21, 2009 - 3:43 PM
                                        I'm older than Hot Death, but from my childhood thru adulthood (until the past few years), it was no big deal to make jokes and puns about all the races, straight across the board. PC? Unheard of!! There were tons of jokes about the Irish, Mexican, Poles, Italians and on and on. The only reference to gay that I ever heard was: "If you wear green on Thursday then you're queer!" (this was from grade school and most of us didn't even understand what it meant - just don't wear green or everyone will laugh at you. Ah, the innocence of youth - back in the day. . .)

                                        Anyway, I do feel that PC is carried way too far in some instances. As I grew up it was Equality In The Insults. No one took it seriously and and everyone laughed at all the jokes, as every race was insulted.

                                        PC is good but too much PC is bad, Just how I feel about it . . .
                                      • Re: Finding the Gay Mayberry

                                        Wed, October 21, 2009 - 3:49 PM
                                        "Gay" is an adjective and therefor should not be made plural. "Gay" describes, it is not a thing. A person can be gay, but not be a gay. That's like saying someone is a tall, or a happy. It's bad grammar, but not necessarily insulting. It's sort of like the current trend of making nouns into verbs. Transition is a thing. You make a transition, you do not transition. You have lunch, you do not lunch!

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