I really enjoyed watching your video. I had to watch it with the sound off b/c I'm at work but it was still very enjoyable (sometimes without music, you'd be surprised how boring a performance can be). I have a few suggestions, but overall I really liked your performance.
First, your shoulders look like they are a little hunched forward. It's really not that bad-- I have seen so much worse. If possible (some people are just built differently than others) you might want to roll them back a little more.
Your arms were not bad but I felt like they didn't match the rest of what you were doing. They seem pretty relaxed and casual while everything else you are doing is tight and crisp. You seem to be giving every other part of your body a lot of attention, while the arms sometimes seem like they are just there.
I am curious whether or not this was improv. It seems like improv (please don't take this as an insult), which is both good and bad-- it seems less premeditated and "forced" than most choreography but there were places where you seemed tentative. While it wasn't boring there was certainly some considerable repetition (which is not bad in my opinion, sometimes if it's all new moves strung together the dance can get exhausting for the audience). Either way, but especially if it was choreography, I would suggest starting with some simpler moves and building up to more complex stuff (e.g. layering) so that you get a sense of repetition with similar moves but you build on a theme as the song progresses. I think this is a good way to extend interest in a long song. For the most part your energy level and the difficulty of your moves were pretty much standard throughout. I am a fan of playing with the audience a little and only throwing in a few really cool moves at the beginning of the dance.
I liked the way you left the stage but I think it would have been even more attitude-y if you gave the audience one last look on your way out, like "uh huh, that's right bitches" and then turn to go. :D
It was hard to see your expression, so I'm not sure if I can comment on audience interaction or stage presence. And like I said, I have no idea what the music sounded like.
Hope this was helpful.

thanks for the critiques! All excellent suggestions :)

Here's another one to look at... critique either!

Sword: youtube.com/watch

Megan