give me the negativity you've caught or seen or experienced, or heard, or felt, or all of the above. give me the nothing you like, everything, anything you don't like, about me and/or your experience of me. if you've had nothing but positive everything, and I mean EVERYthing, without a single negative, then please, for this particular thread, remain silent.. all others, please, report here.
I love you all
now hit me
I love you all
now hit me
posted by:
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New York City
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Re: growing pains..
Sun, January 7, 2007 - 4:16 AM...bitch outPANed me. Good thing he's so lovable. :-)
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Re: growing pains..
Sun, January 7, 2007 - 6:08 AMDarling, Even before I met you, all I heard about you was the most amazing wonderful positives. Everyone I spoke to loves you and thinks the world of you. We all have negatives or quirks about ourselves, it's human nature. And every person has a slightly different take on you(meaning us) because we are all individuals and our interactions are different. There are reasons why some people might be hesitate to approach you, each for their own reasons which might be completely different than the next person.
Don't try to think of it as a negative but maybe a quirk that might offend or turn some folks away. We all have a certain amount of tolerance. Not everyone likes everyone, some might not like a certain trait about you, while others might find it charming.
Part of growing up and getting older is learning more about yourself and others. Sometimes it hurts because there might be something you did that you never realized that affected someone else in a negative way. Asking folks to give you all the negatives isn't gonna work cause they all love you so damn much and if they did have something they felt wronged about, I think they would rather approach you in private, then let the world in an open forum.
I always make fun of my quirks because it helps me accept me. God knows there are things I don't like about myself and things I just can't control because it is who I am, no matter what. It turns some folks off, and though it saddens me, that's life.
God I hope this helps somewhat.
xoxoxo
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Re: growing pains..
Tue, January 9, 2007 - 10:23 AMThank you Miyo.. but I have to say, that perhaps you haven't considered the fact that a bunch of learning can come of just giving people the space to purge. I've already received a niiiice little bit of responses, and though they were addressed to my private messages, they came as a result of me putting this call out there.
I don't believe there is any way that I am that is just 'me'.. because I choose who, and what I be, and how I go about being in this world. I think a lot of times, people use the excuse, 'this is just the way I am" as a means of not taking the responsibility to look at, authentically look at the way they are being, and seeing if it's something they wish to keep, or shift in favor of something new. and I specifically asked people to give me what had occurred for THEM as negative. that doesn't mean it IS, simply that it occurred for them as such, and I'd like the opportunity to experience it, myself on a not positive level, through the eyes of someone who has experienced me that way.
this is beautiful, and challenging, and delightful all rolled up into one experience.
I love it. -
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Re: growing pains..
Tue, January 9, 2007 - 11:22 AMI think some people prefer learning lessons slowly and gently and others can be a bit more extreme-sport about it. As a fellow extreme-sporter, I think I get what you're trying to do and look, bottom line is that I respect your effort to push yourself and learn and grow in whatever way you think will work best for you. If you feel capable of and inclined toward taking in and considering constructive criticism en masse without internalizing negativity or feeling resentment then I hope you get a boatload of material to work with so this exercise can prove helpful. And I trust that people who respond to your request will do so from a place of love, trusting you to ask for what you really and truly want ,and in an attempt to offer you exactly what you asked for. I'd love to hear how this goes for you if you're ever inclined to share!
loving you,
B
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Re: growing pains..
Tue, January 9, 2007 - 5:07 PMI get what you are saying. I do. but when I meant this is who I am, I guess I didn't explain myself more. It's really personal and I'd rather share it off-list which I will do. But I do believe there are certains things about oneself that can't be changed. I do agree many people do use the excuse "this is just the way I am" because they are unwilling to look at themselves and see what CAN be changed. I was speaking from my own experiences and baby....mental illness is something I can't change abut myself no matter what. :-)
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Re: growing pains..
Wed, January 10, 2007 - 3:49 PMThere's this damn divorce and all this weight to be loss and the lovers who didn't love me, enough or on time. There's my balding and my aging skin and my slackening cleverness and my unrealized hopes and dreams. It seemed just yesterday I was frolicking, barefoot, in the dewy grass of youth. Now I hobble on bunions through the crab grass of middle age... Aw, boo-fuckin'-hoo. I can't even feel all that sorry for myself. I hate my grudges and my endless self-griping monolouge. I've got a pain in my neck and a chip on my shoulder and I want to feel the summer sun on my face and back and butt and feet... (thanks man, I do feel better-ish)
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Re: growing pains..
Wed, January 10, 2007 - 5:07 PMahhh Miyo my love,
thank you for giving me a taste of the precious that is you..
so, in essence, the you and I are in agreement, there are the those who use waaaaay too many excuses for
their lack of lookerating, and then there are those who genuinely have... stuff that isn't solvable in quite that fashion.
this then, doesn't include those people, except in the places where they simply aren't being authentic about
what's going on for them. and in this instance, because I'm the one asking for it, I can say that I do not have that as part of
my make up, therefore bring it own bring it own...
yuh
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Re: growing pains..
Sun, January 21, 2007 - 3:50 AMBM 2005
I was giving you a big hello hug
and you looked over my shoulder for someone else who you promptly ran over to...
uh, but ain't that my own self worthy shit?
hmnn prolly. but then, maybe it happens other times? so, I just say it
even though, really it ain't no thang to me anymore
it is also an invitation to myself to stay present in the present
'cause I am sure that I have done the same
