So I'm home tonight while my girlfriend is out at a bar with a bunch of friends. She has a few drinks once in a while and certainly doesn't seem to have any trouble taking it or leaving it. She's got as far from an addictive personality as I know. Most of the time this doesn't really cause any trouble. But tonight, it just didn't feel right for me to sit around people that were drinking.
I'll go out to a club if there's some good music going on. I'll dance at a good party where some people are on drugs. I'll do anything anywhere if I've got a legitimit reason for being there other than getting high or drunk.
Sometimes my instict just tells me not to go into certain situations. Tonight was one of those times. My girlfriend doesn't fully understand, though she tries and is supportive. I can tell it's sometimes disapointing for her. By the time she left, we had had a good discussion about how we were both feeling and left things on a good note, but still sometimes I wish it wasn't an issue at all.
I don't know if I've got a point or anything to bring up for discussion. I just like this tribe and thought I'd spill out my thoughts--it's comforting.
Thanks for being here.
I'll go out to a club if there's some good music going on. I'll dance at a good party where some people are on drugs. I'll do anything anywhere if I've got a legitimit reason for being there other than getting high or drunk.
Sometimes my instict just tells me not to go into certain situations. Tonight was one of those times. My girlfriend doesn't fully understand, though she tries and is supportive. I can tell it's sometimes disapointing for her. By the time she left, we had had a good discussion about how we were both feeling and left things on a good note, but still sometimes I wish it wasn't an issue at all.
I don't know if I've got a point or anything to bring up for discussion. I just like this tribe and thought I'd spill out my thoughts--it's comforting.
Thanks for being here.
posted by:
|
Washington
|
-
Re: Challenges
Thu, June 15, 2006 - 10:09 PMSounds to me like you know where the dangers are and you're taking care of yourself. It's a drag sometimes when us non-users feel left out, but we also avoid the pain of doing substances that make us hurt ourselves and others. On the whole I'll take the occaisional regrets.
Hang in there!
-
Re: Challenges
Thu, June 15, 2006 - 10:10 PMHey Erik. Tell me if I understand what you mean...
I am tired of gatherings where the main intent is to get loaded. When I was an underaged drinker, everything was cool and exciting-- understandably, since it was not even legal at the time. But I have become bored of this scene. Now if people happen to succeed in enjoying altered states of conscience while at a fun event-- doing new things, hearing great music, meeting new people and sharing new ideas, than I'm interested in joining the group. But I need more stimulation from others than just the desire to become numb or high on something, or I'll end up not enjoying myself nor the group. I want to share wild ideas and adventures. I want to try something I've never tried before. I want to learn new things. I want stimulation. Otherwise I want to stay home and do my own thing.
Am I on the same page as you?
-
Re: Challenges
Fri, June 16, 2006 - 10:15 AMI hear ya- people who go out just to get fucked up...not too amusing.
I mean, I am fine with social drinking, I love having a beer or two at parties, since I LOVE beer, and it's something to have in my hand.... but it's not WHY I'm there.
I've been going to fewer and fewer social events, because many of them in my circle seem to have morphed into an "all about the substances" frightfest. Now, I pick and choose my events very carefully-- they either have to have a theme that I can do something with, or a DJ that I REALLY REALLY love, or there's a huge group of my friends going and I can get a chance to see people I don't see often..... or if it's some weird social-anarchy type event like a flashmob pillow fight or something.
In other words-- reasons BESIDES the substances.
Meh. -
-
Re: Challenges
Fri, June 16, 2006 - 11:20 AMAhhhhh... Finally! --to be understood.
: )
-
Re: Challenges
Fri, June 16, 2006 - 12:31 PMI must say hear hear in all.
I'm OK with social drinking. I'm OK with occassional drug use. But it's just strange when it's only you and two other people who are sober. I hate having to closet myself off from part of the world.
But now I leave it to shows I really want to see, clubs (since the ones I frequent tend to have people drinking, but not so much on the drug use... that I'm aware of), and only going to drug heavy events if they REALLY appeal to me. But I just can't mentally do drug heavy events often. It almost seems like a psychological drain on me. Or at least that's my observance.
-
-
Re: Challenges
Fri, June 16, 2006 - 3:46 PMThis issue first started coming up for me over a decade ago. I asked myself "If I only have fun at school dances when I'm drunk or high, are school dances really fun for me?". The answer was no.
I think if an event isn't fun for you, even if you don't have a single drink, then you shouldn't be there.
So, bars come into question. I went to a bar once and stayed sober. I hung out with friends. Man... you really see how other people are changing as they drink when you're not drinking. We rarely realize how drunk we actually are.
I had cut down to a beer or two when out a long time ago. I thought that wasn't much different from not drinking anything at all. But it really, really, is. I feel a new topic brewing...
