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Hey all...
I have asked my lady to handfast with me. We are going to have the ceremony at or near Purdue University in West Lafayette IN. I also want this union to be recognized by the government so that my lady can benefit from my medical benefits, etc. So... we are looking for a pagan "officiant" in the West Lafayette area who has the power to sign a state "marriage license".
Can anyone out there give us some help in this matter?? It would be greatly appreciated.
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SF Bay Area
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Re: Need Some Help Planning a Handfasting
Mon, January 26, 2009 - 3:07 PMI knew a couple who had the captain of a ship do it... apparently that's a loophole, at leas tin Oregon... so is there a seafaring captain who is pagan around? maybe not, you are landbound... -
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Re: Need Some Help Planning a Handfasting
Mon, January 26, 2009 - 7:16 PMYeah... that's the problem with Indiana, never a ship's captain when you need one.... go figure... :-)
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Re: Need Some Help Planning a Handfasting
Tue, January 27, 2009 - 12:03 PMAn idea that might work, although I don't know your state laws... Anyone can go to the website for Universal Life Church and become officially ordained on line in about 4 minutes:
www.themonastery.org/
They are a route for anyone who wishes the legal title but practices outside the most recognized faiths. I've heard that more than half the marriages in CA are performed by ULC ministers, but I don't know if that is true. Anyway, you could have any willing friend become ordained and perform the hand fasting for you. If ULC is recognized by your state, then you will still need to get all the legal documents for your state, county, etc, just like any other minister would. Best of luck!
Blessings,
Lichen -
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Re: Need Some Help Planning a Handfasting
Wed, January 28, 2009 - 7:31 AMCongratulations!
Lichen is right about the ULC, that's a good way to do it but make sure your state will recognize their authority before you do that. Some state's require the person to register with the state before they have the authority to officiate unions. You could also go to a judge/justice of the peace for the legal paperwork and have the Handfasting be your heart's commitment to one another. My husband and I did this.
We got legally married while in Hawaii for $75 and filing fees. I found an officiant on Craig's List, checked out her credentials with the state. We filed the paperwork at the Kilua-Kona courthouse, she officiated and license, and she sent it in for filing. The $75 covered her time & travel and the filing fee. Badda-bing badda-boom we were legally married.
A month after we got back from Hawaii we had a big Handfasting and jumped the broom, the whole 9 yards. When we arrived home that afternoon the copies of our license had arrived =)
For a great book with lot's of good rituals and inspirations get yourself a copy of Handfasting & Wedding Rituals: Welcoming Hera's Blessing - R. Kaldera & T. Schwartzstein tinyurl.com/dekl6q
many blessings. -
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Re: Need Some Help Planning a Handfasting
Fri, January 30, 2009 - 9:15 AMi second jezebel's book recommendation. it was very useful when i was planning my handfasting. there are gorgeous words in that book....
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Re: Need Some Help Planning a Handfasting
Fri, May 8, 2009 - 3:22 PMHi I live in the UK and unfortunately i am having to get married legally then have a Handfasting, we have have our wedding in the morning very small and then at midnight or family's and friends will join us for the Handfasting but it is all working out well i think :( so maybe that might be a way forward ???! -
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Re: Need Some Help Planning a Handfasting
Fri, May 8, 2009 - 4:31 PMThat's how things are probably going to work out for us too. The legal part will allow my lady to be on my health insurance and it will lower our tax bill... not romantic, but very practical. Oh yeah... her family is wealthy and doesn't approve of our Handfasting; by doing the legal thing first it makes it very difficult for them to interfere...
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Re: Need Some Help Planning a Handfasting
Fri, May 8, 2009 - 4:32 PMOh yeah... I know it's a bit late, but I wanted to thank every one who commented here it's been a great help. I haven't been able to post here because my lady and I have been busy with family issues caused by our plans to handfast... {{sigh}}
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Need Some Help Planning a Handfasting
Sat, May 30, 2009 - 10:55 PMThis is Halcyon- SpiritFlame's fiance- and I wanted to bump this thread up because we are still having some difficulties finding someone to lead the handfasting ceremony.
If anyone can help us out, please send me a PM. We, unfortunately, don't have anyone that is willing to do it for us (friends or family) due to religious conflicts (even though we were willing to leave the religious parts out...as I am not religious, just spiritual...but that is neither here nor there at this point. So, getting someone ordained isn't an answer. We are going to do the legalities prior to the ceremony, so we are just looking for someone to lead through the ceremony with appropriate respect and honor for the ceremony.
Thanks for all your previous help and anything that might come up in the future.
-H.
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