I bet she's missing itl. Hooping is one of those comfort things that allow us to transform sadness into joy and pull ourselves out of depression. Hopefully after these surgeries, she'll be healthy again and return to hooping. I realize that learning will be more of a challenge without sight but I commit to try to help. I am creating a move inventory and I will share that with her and try to flesh out each move individually to help her get them. Please let her know that so she has something to look forward to.

It's hard to know what to say in a situation like this. I think my first respons was denial. In Elisabeth Kubler-Ross's stages of grief (which she designed when studying death, how people dealt with other people's and their own but can be applied to almost any kind of loss), the first stage of grief was usually denial. "I can't believe this is happening! Thsi can't be happening! Don't give up hope." The second step is usually anger and blaming. "Why is this happening? God, why are you doing this to me?" The third is bargaining. "Maybe if I do this, this will happen instead" -- like see this surgeon or eat this food or take this med). The fourth is depression, which is where it sounds like Thundershyne is now. And the fifth, the one she is on the cusp of and seems to be moving into is acceptance.

She is a brave, brave woman. I don't envy her the path she is having to walk right now but I don't know anyone stronger or more capable to walk it. I am glad you are there to hold her hand and be with her and love her. I hope you are getting the support you need also.

I am sending you both love and saying prayers and hoping for the best outcome possible.

I read something recently. It was in a Note from the Universe, a little message I get everyday in my email. In fact, I saved it and I didn't know why ... but I guess now I do. Here it is:

When "bad" things happen to "good" people, Carolyn, it's often because they want to become even better teachers, guides, and helpers to those precious souls who will one day need them to be their rock.

Plus, today's bad is always tomorrow's boon, no matter who you are, no matter what has happened, and no matter how weak the coffee was."

I know that's true. I know that every "bad" thing that has ever happened to me has also had blessing in it. It has made me stronger, wiser, kinder, more compassionate, more resourceful, and other lessons unique to each tragedy. The same is true for everyone. I encourage you both to look for and embrace the blessings in this experience. I am embracing the lack of pain for our dear friend. The pretty blue eyes she will have again, so like her own. The role model she will be for others in this position (as I know she will be and already is). The role model she is for all of us in how to endure adversity with grace, style, courage and humor. And many more that none of us can know now but which be revealed in the fullness of time.

Blessings to both of you. I look forward to hearing how things go. And I will try to have an initial move inventory done by the time she completes her surgery so that she will have something to look forward to!!! Love to you both.