Children and what they bring with them

topic posted Tue, June 3, 2008 - 8:56 PM by  offlinecup
I don't believe that all children are the same.

Almost from day one they have individual personalities that distinguish them.

When I was a child, I found children had different levels of empathy and compassion.

I have to wonder about nature Vs Nurture.

Do you believe your life experiences made you empathic, or do you believe it was something that existed when you were born?
posted by:
cup
online cup
Australia
  • Re: Children and what they bring with them

    Sun, August 31, 2008 - 7:13 AM
    Considering I can remember some of my thoughts while still being in a crib, I'd have to say the empathic quality developed along the way. I didn't feel very empathic of my mom when she put me to bed in the crib..... I only felt anger that I was made to do something I didn't want to do, and I had no way to tell her except by crying. But I do recall feeling compassion towards other children by the time I was 5 or 6 years old.
  • Re: Children and what they bring with them

    Tue, September 2, 2008 - 3:25 AM
    I was removed from my mother before 6 weeks and never saw my father until some 7-8 years ago, 38 years later.

    We answer the phone with the same tonality, despite him being welsh and me brought up in middle England.
    We both wrote a piece of software employing Edward de Bono's thinking skills strategies to enhance creativity, and have much in interests and personality in common. Neither of us are bothered about football (soccer) a rare thing it seems in men in the UK :-)
    I *look* like the men on my mum's side of the family, but have nothing in common with them in terms of interest and personality

    So I took a massive swing from nurture to nature. Having seen my daughter *emerge* into the world, I would say all the potential is there, but is trained as a plant can be trained as it grows... inhibit growth in one direction, develop it in another
  • Cat
    Cat
    offline 0

    Re: Children and what they bring with them

    Fri, September 12, 2008 - 4:18 AM
    I believe it is mostly nature. My mother did not give much in the way of loving support when I was growing up-she wanted me to live her dreams, not my own (stars, I am glad I became an early childhood educator, not a doctor or therapist, that would be disaster for me). Looking back, I think this came down to me through my mother's side. One aunt is diagnosed bi-polar and I wonder if she is really an untrained empath and another who passed a couple of years ago deadened the pain in the 70s with illegal drugs. She seemed to KNOW me more than my own parents or spouse at the time. I work with infants now and my gift/curse/whatever really helps me in my daily work. I know if they are hungry or need a diaper change or even just a little cuddle. Sometimes, however, I think the small ones have it right and the adults have it wrong. The children seem just drawn to me. One day I was having a hard time, dealing with feeling my coworker's stress over home issues and my own worry about my weekend job and one of the little guys came over to me and put his chubby little arms around my neck and just hugged me. It brought tears to my eyes, feeling his simple little wish that his teacher be happy. One of the reasons I work with kids is that their wants & needs are simpler than adults, and are often the same. They want to eat because they need to eat-stuff like that. My belief that you are just born like this makes me somewhat worried to have children of my own, something I've always wanted because this right now seems like a hardship rather than a wonderful gift.
    • Re: Children and what they bring with them

      Sat, September 13, 2008 - 5:20 PM
      Sometimes we forget what they remember!
      • Re: Children and what they bring with them

        Mon, September 15, 2008 - 9:56 AM
        I have always believed that each of us comes with our own agenda and abilities. I have always been an empath and pre-cog. Our children all arrived with their talents onboard. As a matter of fact, I communicated with them when they were in utero. Also, if you look around, you see so many sibs who have been raised in as close as you can get to identical circumstances turn out with radically different abilities and even ethics. I think you are right on the money, Bard, they sometimes remember what we have forgotten.

        Kate
        • Re: Children and what they bring with them

          Thu, October 2, 2008 - 5:42 PM
          Ours have followed us for years before either Stacey or I knew each other. Long before they were conceived!
          Let's just say that the faeries gave them to us!
          It is an interesting story of how it all happened!

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