I don't know the best way to say it myself, but I can begin to bullet point some of the things you might use as part of your communication...sort of like brainstorming or a rough draft for a paper on communicating what you feel and need to say so you do not build resentment or resistance orconflict..it is likely she has no idea that people might not want hugs/kisses all the time

..there must be some nice quiet, calm way to let her know that greetings are nice but "not everyone wants a hug & a kiss"...


But:even so, in cases where you cannot avoid physical contact, mistaken or intentional, you still need to have tools to have boundaries and or release other's energy, a grounding cord, a ball of white light, imagining putting their energy in a rose an blowing it up..taking a salt bath

good luck !

tell her that you are a sensetive person, who doesn't really appreciate getting all that close...let her think you are a weirdo :D, as long as it works! This works for me anyway!

best wishes
Sue

learning to stand in our Truth seems to be a major thing for us to remember. we seem to have forgotten that our Truth is viable, valuable, and every bit as valid as anyone elses.
Then we can speak our Truth. and the same reasons apply. we dont have to do so out of judgement, or right/wrong/ or good/bad. It's just our Truth. and to be in integrity, we have to remember how to stand in it, and speak it.

Well, if you don't mind a little white lie... you could always tell her you have allergies and her perfume bothers you. I have allergies myself and perfumes are bad for me, as well as any kind of fur, wool, or loose pet hair. So I don't know if you have any of those allergies in common with me, but... if you do have any of these allergies, you wouldn't necessarily be lying about them. It just wouldn't be the reason you don't want to hug her, but it's a reason she might accept.

My mother used to say that I didn't have any tact. What she meant was, that when I was a child, I couldn't lie. So I guess I've kind of learned how to twist the truth. I don't lie really, but I've learned to misapply the truth in certain situation. On the rare occasion I do lie though, it's usually in cases like yours where I just don't like the person and I'd rather be expedient about avoiding them than tactful.

I usually tell people very matter of fact "please don't, it makes me feel uneasy".

Person who does that usually is totally unaware of boundaries of others (and self).

I found that saying things as straight and simple as possible works best, without leading to further trouble. Sometimes a little more explanation is required, but the discussion that follows is usually clearing up a lot of tension and the boundary-crossing stops.

Oh, people do not have to like me, that's their choice.

This won't be easy, no matter how you approach it. I am not known for being the most tactful person around, but then I don't think there is a special way to say, I don't want to be touched by you to someone who insists on touch. I think of it this way, I have to honor my my intuition, it can guide me and lead me through life, if I dishonor it for the sake of someone else's feelings, I am allowing them liberties I ought not. My response would be simple, a step back, a hand up, a friendly smile, and "I don't want to be hugged, thanks". It will be uncomfortable, but that discomfort is the price you pay for serenity and proper boundaries. You have a right to the space around you, to say who will and will not enter it.