Hi, I'm Bruce McCulloch. I'd like to tell you about the Daves I know.

These are the Daves I know, I know
These are the Daves I know
These are the Daves I know, I know
These are the Daves I know

David Hoffman
He works in my dad's store
He's worked here for 12 years
He'll probably work here for more

These are the Daves I know, I know
These are the Daves I know
These are the Daves I know, I know
These are the Daves I know

Dave Gort
I've known since I was six
In grade eight he broke his leg
So we got drunk and sick

These are the Daves I know, I know
These are the Daves I know
These are the Daves I know, I know
These are the Daves I know

Some of them are Davids
[Dave Gort: But most of us are Daves]
They all have their own hands
But they come from different moms

These are the Daves I know, I know
These are the Daves I know
These are the Daves I know, I know
These are the Daves I know

Dave Jadiski
Man, this cat can swing
He weighs almost 50 pounds
And he delivers my paper on time

These are the Daves I know, I know
These are the Daves I know
These are the Daves I know, I know
These are the Daves I know

Dave Capisano
I hardly know him
...
[Bruce stands around, looking vaguely uncomfortable for the rest of the measure]

These are the Daves I know, I know
These are the Daves I know
These are the Daves I know, I know
These are the Daves I know

[Next two measures sung by the Daves Bruce knows: ] We are the Daves he knows, he knows
We are the Daves he knows
We are the Daves he knows, he knows
We are the Daves he knows

Some of us them are Davids
But most of us are Daves
We all have our own hands
But we come from different moms

These are the Daves I know, I know
[Daves: We are the Daves he knows, he knows]
[All: These are the Daves]