Thank you, Nicole...

Sometimes I think we just need to take a deep breath and say "Hey, look what I did!!" and be proud of the effort.

Sometimes, we need a dose of reality. Thanks Nicole!

Thanks, I really appreciate that :)

**HUGS** to Nicole!

Thanks Nicole!

thanks hun.
well said!

Ahh you are so right, it's something i need to remind myself of all the time. You can do anything if you believe in yourself :)

Well said. I'm going to call my teacher and tell her I'll do that solo after all.

Nicole, you really cut to the heart of something that happened to me yesterday. I just learned to crochet, so I'm still in the must-crochet-24-hours-a-day phase and made a lip balm holder and coffee cup cozy for a friend who is addicted to, you guessed it, lip balm and Starbucks! I emailed her to set up a lunch date, all excited that I made her something out of the blue. Well, when I got her excited email back wondering what little presents I had in store for her, I got nervous that she would think they are stupid/trivial/hokey/weird/fill-in-your-biggest-fear-here. It was all I could do to resist "pre-apologizing" for a gift I made her for no reason other than I hoped it would make her giggle and bring her a little joy. Why should I apologize for that? Because it might not be the best thing in the world? Who cares?! I still thought of my friend, made something tailored to her, and was excited enough to actually give it to her.

I can't tack my fears onto someone else's reactions. I can't protect myself from hurt, rejection, or criticism by beating my detractors to the punch. I can't allow myself to become my biggest detractor. It's hard; we think we are being humble when what is really happening is that we are doing what we would not do to a stranger on the street: being actively degrading and sometimes downright mean. I am the only person, in my whole life, who I will see every single day of my life. I think it's best if I make friends with her and try to celebrate her accomplishments and strengths rather than beat her down with some crippling, false sense of modesty.

Thanks, Nicole. :)

BB!
~Jeannie

Thanks Nicole!

Especially for the wabi-sabi link! It's something I have in my brain but outside influence has had me grappling with it! Reading your post helped me line things back up!

I LOVE looking at the photos people post on Tribe! I really enjoy the photos from newbies and beginners - the fresh approaches and creativity is just wonderful!

You are the best! I was just thinking about this skirt I made that I wasn't AS happy with as I wanted to be and your post really made my day!! *BIG HUGS*

::showers THEN huggs Nicole::
^_^

Wow - just the message I needed today. I'm an older student of bellydance, and sometimes feel I can't 'measureup' to younger dancers with flexible bodies and sharp minds ! Everyone says 'you're great' ( respective of my age, etc) but, like you say, the mind responds with a NAW --- so I negate my accomplishment and undermine myself. Ouch ! Thanks for the uplifting thoughts, m'dear.

Thank you!
Some very wise words and something i will keep in mind next time!!!

oxox Sally

I didn't look at this post at first, because I thought it was about spotting techniques so you didn't literally get dizzy and fall down!!! LOL

I agree with you about words having power. I've been dancing for less than a year and I am performing my first solo a week from tomorrow, in front of maybe as many as 100 people. But my choreography and music are good, and I've been practicing really hard for an hour a day for three months (the dance is 6 minutes), and I finally got the backbend to work, so I will try to remember your words. I will be great!!! Thanks for the pep talk.

So, I did that solo and rocked the Casbah if I may say so myself lol. My other halfs eyes nearly fell out of his head and he's barely let me out of bed for the last few days (he's never seen me dressed up or dancing before) but most of all I seriously impressed the tribal teacher I want to go study with and she's booked me in to a trial workshop with her next month to see how fast I can learn. I can't thank you enough for giving me that little boost that I needed to believe in myself. I got the biggest cheer of the night and although my stomach started quivering with terror halfway through and I struggled to do the belly rolls it looked like I was shimmying LOL so noone noticed. My teacher told me she was unbelievably proud of me which really means a lot because we're dear friends. For one small, tiny moment, standing there while everyone went nuts I felt proud of being woman and I felt beautiful. We raised almost £500 for charity :)

The other side of it is that I took a fall :( A big one. My mother came to the Hafla and from the minute she walked in til the minute she left she did nothing but criticise what I wore, the things I'd made, the construct of my outfits and the other dancers. So having come off stage on a big high I am now having a major stress over what to make next. I have all this gorgeous blue taffeta and cream chiffon and all I can hear are her words ringing in my head about how I'm fat and shouldn't wear such revealing things. :( Sometimes you can't help setting yourself up to dive-bomb :(

Anyway, we're struggling with getting the video up because it was recorded onto mini DV so we're taking it to friends of ours in a couple of weeks to see if they can transfer it onto DVD so I can upload it onto the computer and then to youtube. I will, however, be picking up my photos on Friday so I can put them into my profile to show you :) I was so proud of my green outfit - the satin just ripples like you wouldn't believe!! I'm looking forward to showing you some of my creations - I was particularly proud of all my flowers - I kitted out three of the girls with hairwear so watch this space :) I'll get pictures up hopefully by the end of next week!!

Yeah! This could not have come at a better time!

THANX!

Nicole:

Thank you so much for the pep talk. I'm really bad about that sort of talk.

Whenever I make something I always see the parts that didn't turn out the way I wanted it to. It's the same with dance moves when I can't nail them and it's also the same with anything I buy (inexpensively) or do with my hair. That may be the reason why people feel like they can put me down. It sounds like I have no self confidence, but that is changing now.

Thank you from the bottom of my heart,

Azeeza