Ask a Texan's topics - tribe.net

MODERATOR

The Obamination — Fri, 15 Feb 2008 09:52:21 GMT

I WOULD LIKE TO BE THE NEW MODERATOR OF THIS TRIBE.

posted in Ask a Texan - 2 replies

Native Texan

Wed, 29 Aug 2007 04:55:17 GMT

Native Texan, native asshole.

But there's always room for more assholes in Texas, it don't matter where you was born, we got room for more.

posted in Ask a Texan - 1 reply

Texas

Mon, 16 Jul 2007 01:30:06 GMT

Texas has more Bed, Bath & Beyonds than any other state.

Um, like that is why we are the most best of states

posted in Ask a Texan - 0 replies

this place sucks

seamus hates musicals — Tue, 26 Apr 2005 22:15:08 GMT

i mean look around...this place is a wasteland

posted in Ask a Texan - 3 replies

Waco & Davidians, etc.

Tue, 25 Jan 2005 06:22:05 GMT

Before the bad press with the Davidian Cult, what was Waco, Texas really like?

Do some Texans really wear cowboy boots, large "western" hats, and have gun racks in their vehicles?

posted in Ask a Texan - 7 replies

One thing about Texans

Sun, 08 Jul 2007 02:45:09 GMT

...is that they love those big old Ford trucks.

Anything made by Ford is a piece of shit, trust me. Any auto industry insider can tell you as much.

posted in Ask a Texan - 2 replies

Which sux more, Dallas or Houson?

Thu, 05 Jul 2007 06:24:29 GMT

Dallas is filled with unfriendly assholes and people who try to use their cars as deadly weapons on the freeways. The nice parts of town are way too fucking expensive, and the people are all just assholes. Did I mention that the people are assholes.

Houston has weather like the inside of a porta potty in July.

What say you?

posted in Ask a Texan - 3 replies

Odessa, Texas

Thu, 06 Oct 2005 11:48:49 GMT

Is anyone here from or near Odessa, Texas?
I have a question for you...

posted in Ask a Texan - 7 replies

Vote for me for moderator !

Ricky — Thu, 28 Jun 2007 23:14:26 GMT

I only joined a couple of minutes ago. And don't know anybody here. I feel I could do a good job moderating and could answer dang near any question 'bout Texas given.

posted in Ask a Texan - 9 replies

Which is which ?

Ricky — Fri, 29 Jun 2007 20:53:21 GMT

http://marsrovers.jpl.nasa.gov/gallery/all/2/p/748/2P192767805EFFAO55P2271R1M1.JPG

http://www.fenmore.com/woodstock/lwf17.jpg

Mars or woodstock 2 ?

posted in Ask a Texan - 2 replies

Ricky has scientifically demonstrated he is a mensch.

Ricky — Fri, 29 Jun 2007 18:46:49 GMT

http://tribes.tribe.net/e9824ad5-dc10-49ef-ace9-cbd61f0a0887/photos/742817e3-1d35-476e-b0ba-988dc7d2c39b

posted in Ask a Texan - 0 replies

tell me boy now wouldn't that be sweet

pulsating_brandon — Mon, 25 Jun 2007 17:05:55 GMT

fart

posted in Ask a Texan - 3 replies

New president

Ricky — Fri, 29 Jun 2007 14:56:52 GMT

http://www.generalpattoncorporateprog.com/images/Will_Rogers.jpg

posted in Ask a Texan - 0 replies

New dear abby... Texas style

Ricky — Fri, 29 Jun 2007 14:52:50 GMT

http://www.greenpeace.org/raw/image_full/international/photosvideos/photos/george-bush-leads-the-us-towar.jpg

posted in Ask a Texan - 0 replies

JOIN THIS TRIBE!

DVDBurner — Mon, 05 Feb 2007 08:10:39 GMT

http://tribes.tribe.net/politicsreligionothers

Just want a beyond heated intelligent political and otherwise debate.

this tribe is not for the meek.
So if you know you are not going to be able to handle it, DONT JOIN!

Ok folks, thanks and let the games begin.

posted in Ask a Texan - 0 replies

dolly madison

trexcellent — Fri, 02 Jun 2006 21:18:43 GMT

dear texan,

is the american flag made out of powdered stars & ding dong stripes? i heard that jesus sewed the flag. i thought he was a carpenter.

signed,
survivor of crotch spot

posted in Ask a Texan - 8 replies

Which is best city in....

Wed, 04 Aug 2004 18:34:26 GMT

Texas?

posted in Ask a Texan - 18 replies

New Modetor

La'Sh'iKwAn'da — Sat, 21 Jan 2006 09:13:40 GMT

I is the new modetor cuz I be a nubian goddess from Loosiana and that be right near Texas. Word!

posted in Ask a Texan - 0 replies

Just a quick boring question...

Rick — Thu, 03 Nov 2005 02:41:35 GMT

I am thinking of moving to Texas adn I wanted to know if anyone can tell me the average utility cost there? Like how much do you ahve to pay for electricity, water... you know that stuff monthly? If you guys can help me, that'd be great. Thank you.

posted in Ask a Texan - 1 reply

Kinky for Gov?

Syr_Anton — Thu, 18 Aug 2005 22:24:59 GMT

It'd be better than the other assholes we have to choose from.

What do ya'll think?

posted in Ask a Texan - 2 replies

Moderator?

Syr_Anton — Thu, 18 Aug 2005 22:23:33 GMT

one...two...three....

NOT IT!

posted in Ask a Texan - 0 replies

Note from Tribe.net: Please assign a monderator

touguy — Wed, 13 Oct 2004 19:59:11 GMT

Hey there, "Ask a Texan" members--

This Tribe doesn't have a moderator, but as a matter of policy, Tribe.net likes all groups to have a leader.
Could you collectively choose someone to moderate your Tribe?

When you've reached consensus, have the new moderator send a note to help@tribe.net, letting us know that you've selected a new leader.

Thanks,
-- TOU (Terms of Use) Guy

posted in Ask a Texan - 4 replies

Texans say no DeLay!

Flakeybee — Tue, 02 Nov 2004 11:35:11 GMT

The Houston Chronicle is an very conservative newspaper, but even it endorses Democrat Richard Morrison over Republican House majority leader Tom DeLay. According to the Chronicle "Morrison faces an uphill battle in this race. The Houston region and the entire country will be better off if he succeeds."

Oct. 18, 2004, 9:15AM

RECOMMENDATIONS
U.S. Congress
The Chronicle endorses candidates in Houston-area races for the House of Representatives.
Copyright 2004 Houston Chronicle

Following last year's redrawing of congressional district lines by the Texas Legislature, many voters find themselves in districts with new numbers and unfamiliar candidates. The Chronicle makes the following endorsements of candidates in Houston-area congressional races:

•District 22, Richard Morrison —A Democrat who promises to place the district's interests above grasping for partisan power in Washington, Morrison seeks to unseat the long-serving Republican incumbent, U.S. Rep. Tom DeLay. Morrison, an environmental lawyer and Sugar Land resident, vows to do a better job in securing federal funds for Houston-area transportation and homeland security. Morrison says he would work to close corporate tax loopholes and invest more in education and health care. He is personally opposed to abortion.
DeLay is the powerful House majority leader, perhaps more influential than the House speaker. The District 22 election thus has national implications that bear heavily on the race.

DeLay has been reprimanded several times by the House ethics committee for an indifference to the rules that reflects poorly on the House and on Texas. Most recently, the committee's bipartisan membership admonished DeLay for offering a favor in exchange for a colleague's vote; giving the appearance of wrongdoing by exchanging access on the golf course for campaign contributions from energy executives; and improperly trying to use federal aviation officials to locate Democratic legislators who had fled Texas.

DeLay's misplaced priorities were most evident in his previous ban on federal rail transit funds for Houston, causing the funds to go to other cities. DeLay was behind the redistricting effort in Texas that displaced badly needed property tax relief and school finance reform as the Austin leadership's top priorities.

Morrison faces an uphill battle in this race. The Houston region and the entire country will be better off if he succeeds.

www.chron.com/cs/CDA/ssis....mpl/editorial/2850084

posted in Ask a Texan - 1 reply

Ok im gonna ask.

Mon, 18 Oct 2004 10:53:15 GMT

I thought that Texans were such badasses! why has'nt any of them jumped at the moderator job? (no im not a Texan) im an Okie. mabey I could run the tribe better, and rename it to Ask An Okie. lol :)

posted in Ask a Texan - 3 replies

Mom's an Asshole

Hambone — Tue, 05 Oct 2004 23:39:35 GMT

Look what Seamus' goody goody MOM DID.

Spoiled our fun. Thanks, Mom.

http://wvgazette.com/section/News/2004100421?pt=10

posted in Ask a Texan - 3 replies

I am The Jane Goodall of The Cowboy Monkey Clutch!

Fri, 01 Oct 2004 20:28:43 GMT

what can i say? it is fucking texas. you are right. i make no excuses for this state.. but sometimes i am expected to apologize for the local apes here.

my study of them (thirteen years in the making) is nearly completed and i have postulated a few theories as to the mental lean of the average texan:

1. the taller your hair is, the higher up you are on the "PICK TICS OFF MY BACK" social ladder.

2. Owning a bunch of guns will make up for a small penis

3. Owning a bunch of guns, means you win the argument

4. Owning a bunch of guns, means you will never have to buy fireworks on the fourth of july.

5. the fourth of july is the busiest time for the gunshot trauma team

6. just because jesus didn't specifically say it, doesnt mean you cant hate blacks and mexicans.. lets face it.. he didnt say you couldnt either.

7. social pecking order in the Cowboy Monkey Clutch is determined by size of belt buckle divided by the number of shit-kickerboots you own over the number of wheels on your truck.

(SOB/SKB)/WOT

8. the "Everything is bigger in Texas" slogan doesnt extend to vocabulary.

9. When in doubt, Lynch!

10. The Only good Liberal is a Dead Liberal.. strangely this theory also applies to jews, homosexuals, and minorities.

posted in Ask a Texan - 2 replies

O.K. Bush

marge — Sat, 21 Aug 2004 18:10:09 GMT

What about this old Fu**er that stole the erection? Huh? What about him? I heard that while governor he put more death row inmates to death than any governor in history, what about that? And hes married to one of the Stepford wives, what about that? And His wife,when younger, kiled her boyfreind, what about that. See, I have family all over Texas. And i can find out alot.

posted in Ask a Texan - 18 replies

band tattoos

dq — Fri, 17 Sep 2004 21:46:25 GMT

Dear Mr Texas

How do you like my new tattoo?

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v475/tattoguy/billy.jpg

posted in Ask a Texan - 7 replies

streamers & confetti?

trexcellent — Fri, 20 Aug 2004 23:58:18 GMT

hey mr. tejas,

i was wondering what texans do to celebrate birthdays? do they put on their sunday best and square dance? do they shoot stray cats? or, do they drink whiskey until they think the next door neighbor's cow looks good?

yours,
just wonderin' for no particular reason.

posted in Ask a Texan - 3 replies

inbreeding

Satan's Ex Girlfriend — Wed, 04 Aug 2004 07:36:53 GMT

Are you for or against this? Just wondering....

posted in Ask a Texan - 23 replies

Yee Haw!

Teets Magee aka Lovely Lauren — Thu, 17 Jun 2004 15:42:47 GMT

Hey Doc!

I know you have your roots in Texas as I do, and I know that you can take the girl outta the country, but can you take the country outta the girl?

Sincerley,

LovelyLauren aka Teets Magee
(agonized in the concrete jungle that is DC)

posted in Ask a Texan - 16 replies

ask a texan goes on a field trip to the Hedonist Tribe

Thu, 19 Aug 2004 19:38:53 GMT

http://www.tribe.net/tribe/servlet/template/pub%2Ctribes%2CViewThread.vm?threadid=9dce1990-020f-4b8c-8021-9aaf822d4a62&_message_resource=info.post.created&tribeid=3ea4416f-b23a-426a-a224-9079bf9d9061

Tha Dawktor is In Y'all.

posted in Ask a Texan - 2 replies

PLEASE ANSWER PLEASE PLEASE

thatwoman — Fri, 30 Jul 2004 23:49:26 GMT

Dear Doctor,

Why is this shit cold?

werd,

Wishing shit wasn't cold

posted in Ask a Texan - 7 replies

Burning Issue of the day

Fri, 06 Aug 2004 14:21:52 GMT

Setting the pages of The Daily Texan alight (or the harddrive or summat)
http://www.dailytexanonline.com/news/2004/08/06/TopStories/Council.Postpones.West.Campus.Decisions-697717.shtml

posted in Ask a Texan - 7 replies

Do you feel that..

Tue, 03 Aug 2004 16:27:14 GMT

Dallas contributed in a positive or negative way to our view of everyday Texan folk?

posted in Ask a Texan - 20 replies

The Doctor Is In

Tue, 03 Aug 2004 15:22:56 GMT

As anything you want about "Gods Little Asspit" Texas. a sincere and thought out answer will be compiled, rewritten then thrown out in lieu of a sarcastic and funny response.

posted in Ask a Texan - 7 replies

New Format

Mon, 02 Aug 2004 20:04:14 GMT

I ahve changed the tribe to be more open to whatever.So ask a texan what he thinks about anything.

posted in Ask a Texan - 4 replies

9 - 50 = 41 why?

Cybornian3rdIgAtO — Sat, 31 Jul 2004 04:33:21 GMT

I remember this tribe once had over 50 MEMBERS! It now only has 41. Why is that? Did the Doc no perform up to scratch?

gAtO - Who cares, it's friday and I got shit to do, who cares.

posted in Ask a Texan - 3 replies

Hey Big D!

Teets Magee aka Lovely Lauren — Tue, 22 Jun 2004 19:09:07 GMT

Is there such as thing as too much of a good thing? For example...a slurpee?

Thanks,

LoveyLauren aka Teets Magee
(queen of the brain freeze)

posted in Ask a Texan - 1 reply

I think I just might vomit

Katie — Wed, 30 Jun 2004 14:54:00 GMT

Dear Doc,

I realized today that Tuesday nights aren't the best for vodka tonics. *scooping self off of the office floor* Having a PHD and all, I figured that you would know of a good hang-over cure.

Please help,
Big bowl of dog crap

posted in Ask a Texan - 14 replies

Real Q for U Doc >

Cybornian3rdIgAtO — Wed, 02 Jun 2004 18:40:09 GMT

Doc..

I fucked up, last month I asked a girl out to a particular show, she said yes.

I got a friend coming from ovaseas and we agreed to hit a show.(the same show)

Then on sunday I also met a girl at a party and it just slipped and I kind of asked her out to this particular show.

Now I have a possible situation that I could have 3 diff chicks coming to the same show!!

The first girl I think she might have forgotten, cuz I didn't get back to her and she hasnt called me. (but she could still be coming)

The second girl looks to be a concrete date.

And the third girl is still to be finalised, but she is waiting for my call.

Cheers,
gAtO - I ain't no playa, but subconsciously I sho' act like one.

posted in Ask a Texan - 32 replies

Vera Vogue

Tue, 22 Jun 2004 17:59:30 GMT

Dear Doctor,
Red eye shadow, green mascara, is it too much?
yours celery
Miss Groupie Supreme

posted in Ask a Texan - 2 replies

ain't no amount of coffee gonna fix me up

trexcellent — Mon, 21 Jun 2004 16:32:14 GMT

dear doctor,

this is a two parter: why the hell do mondays suck so much ass? and, what can i do to make it better?

your biggest fan,
manic monday

posted in Ask a Texan - 8 replies

fat ladies are singing.

e£ gusto — Fri, 18 Jun 2004 17:59:25 GMT

dear dr. arizona,

i'm heavy set, everywhere i go fat ladies sing the beatles "hey jude". can you help me understand what's going on?

signed,
don't make it bad.

posted in Ask a Texan - 3 replies

Yo Yo Doc

lordvader — Sat, 19 Jun 2004 01:24:37 GMT

Is it me?

posted in Ask a Texan - 1 reply

Mugwump jism

Thu, 17 Jun 2004 19:03:01 GMT

Dear Doc,
I think it's time to discuss your philosophy of drug use as it relates to artistic endeavors
yours sincerely
Brouhaha

posted in Ask a Texan - 2 replies

dear DR

jodo — Fri, 18 Jun 2004 18:47:58 GMT

if someone wanted to go halfsies on some drugs, but you didnt know how to get in touch with them to get their half, what would you do?

sincerely,
weed smoker

posted in Ask a Texan - 2 replies

Feva

Teets Magee aka Lovely Lauren — Tue, 15 Jun 2004 19:20:58 GMT

Doctor, Doctor,

Give me the news, I've got a bad cause of lovin blues...is the only perscription more cow bell?

*Tink Tink Tink Tink Tink Tink*

~LovelyLauren aka Teets Magee,
(hurtin for a rhemedy)

posted in Ask a Texan - 15 replies

What's up with the smart broads?

elysewilleatyourbrains — Wed, 16 Jun 2004 22:49:01 GMT

Hey Yo Doc,
Your girlfriend is not only hot, but also smart and funny. What's up with that? I thought bitches could only be ugly and smart, or hot and dumb.
Also, I heard Jude shaves his nads. Any truth to that?
Love,
Elyse

posted in Ask a Texan - 2 replies

dr. arizona

e£ gusto — Wed, 16 Jun 2004 19:42:19 GMT

dear dr. arizona,

you down wit o.p.p.?

sincerely,
naughty by nature

posted in Ask a Texan - 4 replies

But why?

Teets Magee aka Lovely Lauren — Tue, 15 Jun 2004 19:15:09 GMT

Docter Docter,

Why does everyone look at me weird when I am out to eat and the check comes and I say, "What's the Jean Claud VanDammage?"

Please answer soon, as I am about to go out to dinner.

Thank,
LovelyLauren aka Teets Magee
(knows a good line of comedy when she says it)

posted in Ask a Texan - 2 replies

Damn!

Tue, 15 Jun 2004 06:35:20 GMT

You kicked me out of the Worst tribe online - AGAIN! And we were making such good progress, too. So I ask you good doctor - how am I supposed to wheedle my way into yer heart if you keep booting me from yer tribes?

Respectfully,

Sam

posted in Ask a Texan - 15 replies

Dear Ali B

Tue, 15 Jun 2004 19:56:47 GMT

My friend sent me and said you would have all the answers to my troubles. So what say you? (or was the bitch just setting me up for trouble, damn)

posted in Ask a Texan - 7 replies

Give me some suga little girl...

Teets Magee aka Lovely Lauren — Fri, 11 Jun 2004 18:15:39 GMT

Hey Doc!

Can I take candy from a stranger?

~LovelyLauren aka Teets Magee
(would do almost anything for the sweet stuff)

posted in Ask a Texan - 4 replies

Wit?

Fri, 11 Jun 2004 18:12:31 GMT

Dear Doctor nathan
Can I Get A Witness?
Yours in anticipation..

posted in Ask a Texan - 9 replies

A pressing question

thatwoman — Fri, 11 Jun 2004 17:15:15 GMT

Dear Dr. Arizona,

Why the jelly?

Yrs,

Gelatin-Free Since '93

posted in Ask a Texan - 8 replies

the crazy old lady

trexcellent — Fri, 14 May 2004 00:31:21 GMT

dear dr. nathan,

when old people start to lose their marbles (i.e. bea arthur or our favorite longwinded seattle girl) is it wrong to put them down? shouldn't they, like horses, go to the glue factory? isn't it an act of mercy? please answer no, yes, yes--in that order.

love, your number one fan,
t.rex

posted in Ask a Texan - 9 replies

awww hell nah

trexcellent — Tue, 01 Jun 2004 19:59:39 GMT

dear dr. arizona,

who's my baby's daddy? maury don't know, montell doesn't either. can you help me?

yours,
bowlegged

posted in Ask a Texan - 15 replies

A Deep-Ass Q

Tue, 01 Jun 2004 23:23:31 GMT

Why do bad things happen to good people?

posted in Ask a Texan - 7 replies

Dear Docarino

Teets Magee aka Lovely Lauren — Tue, 01 Jun 2004 21:03:46 GMT

Dear Sweet Doc-o-mine,

My friend John and I are getting an RV to cruise around the country in. We need a name for it though. It shall have the word Teets in it in honor of my cool ass name. What shall we name our home on wheels? Incidently, it also has propellors in the back that will allow us to drive across the water!

Thanks,

Lovely Lauren aka Teets Magee (who can think of cool names for herself, but not for her motorhome)

posted in Ask a Texan - 2 replies

i always feel

e£ gusto — Tue, 01 Jun 2004 22:00:30 GMT

dr. arizona,

i always feel like somebody's watchin' me. (and i have no privacy).

should i write lyrics or call the police?

signed,
rockwell with jacko on backing vocals

posted in Ask a Texan - 1 reply

hayride

e£ gusto — Tue, 01 Jun 2004 18:11:54 GMT

dr. arizona,

i spent the weekend on a farm and i took my favorite needle with me on a hayride - what was i thinking?? needless to say, due to the bumpy ride, i lost my needle in the haystack. :( that needle's been in the family for years! should i keep looking or give up?

signed,
discouraged

posted in Ask a Texan - 4 replies

Doc >

Cybornian3rdIgAtO — Thu, 27 May 2004 18:21:24 GMT

How did you obtain your degree? And how much did you pay for it? I heard $50 is the maximum I would expect to pay for my certificate.

Signed,
gAtO Tripn On Mic cord

posted in Ask a Texan - 3 replies

Hey Doc...

Teets Magee aka Lovely Lauren — Wed, 26 May 2004 18:09:17 GMT

Dear Oh Wise Doc (that got stumped on my last question),

Why is it ok to flirt/fool some of the people some of the time, but it is not ok to flirt/fool all of the people all of the time?

Yours Truely,

Lovely Lauren aka Teets Magee and her side kick Teeto the Monkey

posted in Ask a Texan - 20 replies

the kitchen

e£ gusto — Thu, 27 May 2004 18:35:52 GMT

dr. arizona
 
 i'm writing to you from the kitchen. the heat is unbearable. should i get out of the kitchen?
 
 signed,
 sweatinglikeapigupinhere

posted in Ask a Texan - 2 replies

Dr. Nathan A >

Cybornian3rdIgAtO — Wed, 26 May 2004 19:09:32 GMT

Why are people brainwashed? And what shampoo should they use?

posted in Ask a Texan - 7 replies

something on my shoe

e£ gusto — Wed, 26 May 2004 21:57:00 GMT

dr. arizona,

does a bear shit in the woods?

signed,
stepped-in-something

posted in Ask a Texan - 1 reply

hockey

e£ gusto — Wed, 26 May 2004 18:07:11 GMT

dr. arizona,

where did hockey come from?

signed,
puck

posted in Ask a Texan - 1 reply

get in my belly

trexcellent — Tue, 25 May 2004 21:52:23 GMT

dear dr. arizona,

why do fat people (i.e., robert smith, kirstie alley) eat babies?

signed,
cornfused

posted in Ask a Texan - 9 replies

Doctor,i have the fever

The Tick — Wed, 26 May 2004 17:28:11 GMT

Dear Doctor,

Is it time we dance,yes?

Hot and Sexy

posted in Ask a Texan - 11 replies

AYO

lordvader — Mon, 24 May 2004 16:06:04 GMT

What's really good, I'm not feelin the same energy in Seamus tribes why ya'll not showin more love. I'm gonna go shock the Worst Tribe online with some brand new funk to wake up the haters word booty.

posted in Ask a Texan - 9 replies

kitty doctor?

jodo — Mon, 24 May 2004 19:02:02 GMT

hey doc,
bazillion would like to apollogize for hissing at you. however,
after speaking with you about your crazy cat, i got information from a close friend about 4 beautiful kittens being found. is the good doctor looking to adopt?
kitty power,
steve's new neighbor

posted in Ask a Texan - 4 replies

Dear Dr. Arizona

Teets Magee aka Lovely Lauren — Fri, 21 May 2004 14:58:11 GMT

How does the little bunny foo foo song go?

posted in Ask a Texan - 14 replies

sky

e£ gusto — Sun, 23 May 2004 02:10:53 GMT

dear dr. arizona,

why is the sky blue?

signed,
huh

posted in Ask a Texan - 2 replies

dear dr. nick, i mean dr. arizona

trexcellent — Fri, 21 May 2004 20:11:08 GMT

how come when i post something on tribe of substance or pithy value, no one responds. but, if i were to post something about my tits or a picture of my ass, i would have replies? do i smell or something?

what gives?

sincerely,
no one gives two shits

posted in Ask a Texan - 5 replies

when

e£ gusto — Fri, 21 May 2004 18:39:40 GMT

dear dr. arizona,

when will the cows come home?

signed,
still waiting

posted in Ask a Texan - 2 replies

Yo DOC

lordvader — Thu, 20 May 2004 00:29:47 GMT

What's the REAL reason J-Lo and Ben split up?

posted in Ask a Texan - 21 replies

dear dr.

e£ gusto — Mon, 17 May 2004 21:03:23 GMT

how deep is your love?

posted in Ask a Texan - 10 replies

coming to dinner

e£ gusto — Tue, 18 May 2004 00:22:09 GMT

dr. arizona,

i'm tired of guessing. who's coming to dinner?

your truly,
hungry

posted in Ask a Texan - 6 replies

dear dr. arizona

e£ gusto — Mon, 17 May 2004 19:34:50 GMT

how many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop?

posted in Ask a Texan - 2 replies

Bye Seamus

mindiannapolis500 — Thu, 13 May 2004 20:21:18 GMT

We'll miss you and that chisled jaw.
Oh, and the advice too I guess.

posted in Ask a Texan - 6 replies

who's running

e£ gusto — Fri, 14 May 2004 21:28:42 GMT

this popsicle stand?

posted in Ask a Texan - 5 replies

What the fuck?

elysewilleatyourbrains — Wed, 12 May 2004 21:56:46 GMT

Hey Doctor guy,
How the fuck are you going to answer our important questions if you aren't going to be around for a while? Can you recommend someone else, or is everyone else on tribe a chump?
What the fuck?
Love,
Elyse

posted in Ask a Texan - 3 replies

Hey Doc!

Teets Magee aka Lovely Lauren — Thu, 06 May 2004 19:47:48 GMT

I hate my boss alot cause he is a perve, but today he brought me a hula bobble doll in honor of a proposal I am writing for work in Hawaii. I love the doll but he gave it to me after telling me that if we win the proposal he will send me to Hawaii only if I will wear a Hula skirt and get laid (by the flower necklace was the pun premise).

What shall I do about this perve? I don't wanna have to give back my dancing hula girly. I love her!

posted in Ask a Texan - 10 replies

Hey punk ass!

elysewilleatyourbrains — Wed, 05 May 2004 22:52:15 GMT

Dear Dr. Nathan,
Why is it so exciting for everybody when a celebrity sex tape comes out, but we know that it's going to be the same old boring shit with some baby talk.
Can't they get somebody to edit these motherfuckers?
Love,
Elyse

posted in Ask a Texan - 9 replies

Yo SON!!

lordvader — Sun, 02 May 2004 13:28:29 GMT

Buster is clownin you kid, whatcha gonna DOOOO when Bustermania..comes crashin down on YOOOUUU brother--

http://www.tribe.net/tribe/servlet/template/pub%2Ctribes%2CViewThread.vm?threadid=7e6da01e-5db4-4135-9ef7-99f9c6eb2650&tribeid=3dcf7124-2f83-41ec-a5f3-504faec69254

posted in Ask a Texan - 6 replies

Dear Doc

MsPurity — Tue, 04 May 2004 20:59:03 GMT

If a guy had to choose between sex and watching sports, what would he choose if he could only choose one?

posted in Ask a Texan - 16 replies

Corn Poo

e£ gusto — Mon, 03 May 2004 16:58:22 GMT

Dear Dr. Arizona,

Why do we eat corn if we seemingly are unable to digest it fully?

Love,
Looking in the Bowl

posted in Ask a Texan - 15 replies

Doc

lordvader — Sat, 01 May 2004 00:19:27 GMT

Why do you have a picture of......(censored) on the profile for this tribe?

posted in Ask a Texan - 10 replies

Dearest Doctor,

mindiannapolis500 — Fri, 30 Apr 2004 19:17:08 GMT

I woke up this morning and the entire left side of my mouth was swollen like a balloon. I think maybe I got bit by a mosquito, but I can't be sure that little people aren't sneaking in and punching me...
What shall I do?

posted in Ask a Texan - 3 replies

Dear Nathan

Wed, 28 Apr 2004 15:41:24 GMT

Whence sisterhood?

posted in Ask a Texan - 9 replies

Dear doctor,

Satan's Ex Girlfriend — Thu, 29 Apr 2004 09:23:51 GMT

Is it wrong to have erotic thoughts about kittens?

posted in Ask a Texan - 2 replies

gotta eat

etb — Tue, 27 Apr 2004 20:49:07 GMT

So, Doc, got any budget menu ideas for a man down on his luck?

posted in Ask a Texan - 4 replies

picture

e£ gusto — Wed, 28 Apr 2004 01:00:13 GMT

dear nathan,

why is your picture of hi instead of yourself

sincerely,
what the fuck

posted in Ask a Texan - 1 reply

Dearest Dr. Arizona,

blank — Tue, 20 Apr 2004 01:04:07 GMT

After a lifetime of being a "good girl" I've decided to become a supervillan. The problem is, I'm just not very good at it. My villianous cackle (Mooowahahahaha) sounds like a goose call, my evil eye leaves me crosseyed, and my super gadgets (dental floss and gum) are hardly intimidating. What can I do to pump up my evil volume? What can I do to strike fear in the heart of my fellow man? What should I wear to make my enemies quake in their boots? Help me, Dr. A, I just want to make someone pee their pants with fear...is that too much to ask?
Sincerely,
Tamerlane

posted in Ask a Texan - 3 replies

Hobo Life

Sun, 25 Apr 2004 16:58:29 GMT

what's a man to Dr. Do?

posted in Ask a Texan - 4 replies

werk schmerk

lolacarr — Mon, 26 Apr 2004 17:52:44 GMT

dear doctor nathan,

something is really troubling me and i am hoping that you can help. you see, i awoke this morning with a pretty wicked hangover and while i made it to work, i am disturbed by the fact that bloody marys are not being served. unfortunately, it is not an option for me to proceed to the nearest watering hole for medical attention, so what am i supposed to do?

when i was a bartender full time, this was never a problem. one thing and one thing only is becoming apparent -- i'm truly in the wrong profession.

signed,
lola

posted in Ask a Texan - 6 replies

Dr Doc

MsPurity — Sat, 24 Apr 2004 05:27:58 GMT

Why does mommie hate me?

posted in Ask a Texan - 4 replies

where?

Sat, 24 Apr 2004 02:40:57 GMT

Dear Nathan,

Where the fuck were you today?

posted in Ask a Texan - 2 replies

Why?

Wed, 21 Apr 2004 14:05:48 GMT

'lo, Doc.

Tell me, why the popularity of this style of fakir?

Fakir: "Worship me, my lovlies! I am obliquely gothic/sexually ambiguous/racy!" and/or "I'm so handome, you bitches/ninjas obey!

Dummies: "Hilarious! Genius! More!"

Doctor. Why? Why? Why? Hasn't this been done to death? Am I just not hip to what's funny about it? It seems dull.

posted in Ask a Texan - 40 replies