Empowered Living.'s topics - tribe.net

Empowerment

Sat, 09 Dec 2006 02:27:49 GMT

In the book "The Art of Facilitation" there's a really nice definition of empowerment that I'd like to share:

"Empowerment is coming into your own unique place of power where you are truly your own self. It is about recognizing when you are in your power and how you experience this, and bringing it into all aspects of your life. It's all about being at home in your body and in your personal space. It does not always mean being strong and confident - you may be most in your power when you are feeling very vulnerable. It is more to do with being truly authentic and present."

Book link: http://search.barnesandnoble.com/booksearch/isbnInquiry.asp?z=y&EAN=9781555611019&itm=1

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Choosing the Life You Want by Taking Responsibility for the Life you Have

Lisa — Fri, 20 Oct 2006 02:09:28 GMT

Author: Dale Halaway

We have major problems in the world today, not only worldwide but problems in our individual lives around the dynamics of relationships, including our spouses, our friends, our families, our business partners, as well as the relationships with things like finances and careers.

While we all engage in many forms of relationships on a daily basis, most people are operating within them with a very low level of awareness. The problem is they think this is the highest level of awareness that exists. To better understand this concept we first need to look at choice and how it relates to our current circumstances. When it comes to our choices, there is one thing you can go to the bank on and that is this: every time we make a choice, that choice must be followed by a consequence that can only reflect the quality and depth of the choice that was made prior to the experience of the consequence.

Most people are not aware that the reason why their life is the way it is today and everyday is because of them! It's not because of their ex-mate or ex-business partner, even though there are some that have convinced themselves that “he did it to me” or “she did it to me” or “they did it to me” and they are going to pay! But the reality is the only person who is going to pay is you! This person who so-called “did it to you” could be off in Hawaii having a great time and could even be transforming their own lives into something better. Meanwhile, you’re back here saying, “Oh, they're going to pay!” and the one who's really paying is you. Why? Because you are the one who's holding the negative energy! It was your choice! You chose at some point in your life to not only hold others in negative energy but to start accumulating more of its like! Why? Because you’re going to be right, because you know it all, because you’re smart and you have everything under control. Meanwhile, your life is reflecting back to you, you weren’t as smart as you thought you were. Your life is reflecting back to you that something is way out of balance.

In our country we have more wealth that is available to us than any other country in the world and yet we have more people who are struggling financially, barely making it from paycheck to paycheck and don’t even have $5,000 in their bank account. These are people that have been working for 30 or 40 years, eight to five, five days a week like robots. They are doing the same thing everyday from early in the morning to late at night. They are on automatic, but they don't know they are on automatic! They are working the so-called dream by doing their eight or ten hours a day, five maybe six days a week and according to the statistics the average person at the age of 65 will end up dead broke! Why is that? Now some people might answer that question with “That's just the way life is, life has to be a struggle!” Yet, “life has to be a struggle” is nothing more than a thought form that they've turned into their own personal law. It’s them believing that life has to be a struggle and because they are believing it within their heart of hearts, because they are believing it within their cellular structure of the way they think about themselves and the way they feel about themselves, that is what now manifests in their life. What better way for this to show up in someone’s life than that of their finances.

It’s time to start making better choices and one of the highest choices you can make for yourself is to take responsibility for your own life. Start choosing to let go of all this negative energy you have been holding on to because the truth is, the more negative energy you have inside you, the more of a prison you will feel like you are in. There is no freedom in negativity. The more negativity you hold on to, the more you will feel like your life is stuck or you’re living out the same old story over and over again.

So many people come across good opportunities but can’t access them because the moment they start to go toward it, their fears are activated that haven’t been cleared from with inside themselves and they end up making a choice to not go there. Or if they do choose to go there, they end up sabotaging it which becomes another choice. Perhaps their belief system or program is “I’m not good enough” or “others make me wrong”. If this is a program that they have been running for a good portion of their life, then it’s just a matter of time and someone will come into their life and do exactly what they have been believing deep inside and end up making them wrong or making them feel not good enough.

If this has happened to you, and if you haven’t been paying attention, you’re going to think that they really “did it to you”. If you aren’t willing to let that go, it’s just a matter of time and you get to go for round number twelve. Someone else will come in and do the very same thing that the last person just did, only every time somebody comes in and does the same thing, the energy or the experience becomes louder. The next experience or person may look different than the last but after the honeymoon is over and the negative experience reemerges, you realize, “Oh my gosh, I’ve just been sucked in again!” The reason you got sucked in again is because you haven’t been paying attention to what’s going on within you for the purpose of clearing that energy out from within your subconscious body.

Since you are always at choice, you can make it all about them one more time, or you can come to a point where you say, “I’ve had enough. I thought I knew what I was doing but it’s pretty obvious I really don’t. I’m tired of the pain, the confusion, the conflict, feeling like I’m constipated, not just physically, but financially and emotionally. I just can’t imagine that this is what life is really all about. I need to start making some serious changes.” Although this doesn’t feel like a good place to be, it actually is the best place you could be, because now you are ready to really start making choices that will truly empower your life.

There is a higher ground saying that goes, “When the student is ready, the teacher appears”. The truth is, when you are ready to go there, when you are ready to cleanse yourself for real, when you are ready to really evolve and mature and move toward the life that you really deserve and are willing to do whatever it takes for as long as it takes, then all of a sudden the right teacher materializes just for you! This will be the kind of teacher that can truthfully help you accomplish what you’ve now set yourself out to accomplish because you now chose it. Once you choose it and you are willing to back it up with a strong genuine commitment, now the magic can begin!

© 2006 Dale Halaway - Inspiring Seminars, LLC - www.SeminarsThatInspire.com

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What Kind of a Leader are YOU!

Lisa — Fri, 20 Oct 2006 02:08:23 GMT

Author: Dale Halaway

At a time when our country is facing war and questioning our country’s leadership, is when we should be reflecting upon our own leadership styles. It isn’t through trying to change those already in leadership roles that can affect real change in our country, but through the changing of how we lead ourselves and others in our lives that makes the significant difference in our day-to-day realities.

Whether you are a business leader, parent, or simply “leading” your own life, there are two types of leadership styles, Inspiring and Controlling. There are 10 main characteristics that help define the difference between these two types of leaders. We put them in juxtaposition, not to make one bad and/or good, but to simply bring awareness to your own leadership style so you can make a different choice if you find yourself falling into any one of the characteristics of the Controlling Leader.

An Inspiring Leader is authentic, operates from higher ground principles and makes their decisions coming from a place of love, whereas a Controlling Leader upholds a facade, operates from lower ground principles and is coming from a place of fear. In our world today, there is a shift that is happening among individuals as well as in the business world, from being ego-driven to soul-driven in our personal and business missions.

Following are the top 10 characteristics that define these leadership styles:

1.) An Inspiring Leader is open to change and is always looking for better and easier ways of doing things. Their decisions are based on the greater good of all and not solely on one individual. There is an ease about them because they live in divine flow trusting in a higher process. A Controlling Leader fights and resists change. They live in the past and because they have a need to control, often are working with hidden agendas to maintain this perceived control. They always seem stressed and are constantly pushing themselves and pushing others.

2.) An Inspiring Leader lives from their Soul and Spirit. Their family or business becomes the vehicle in which they assist others in changing and growing. They know who they are and why they are here and operate their life from a clear set of core values. A Controlling Leader lives from their ego and personality. They think they know it all and have a deep-seated need to be right. They use their family or business for self-recognition. They resist soul searching or searching for a deeper meaning in life.

3.) An Inspiring Leader is flexible, responsive and adaptable. They are connected to a bigger vision with “big picture thinking” and the awareness that we are all in this together! They are not threatened or intimidated by people with status or money. They accept 100% responsibility for their leadership style and not only admit but apologize when they are wrong. A Controlling Leader is inflexible, reactive and positional. They are disconnected from the bigger picture focusing on “what’s in it for me.” They are threatened or intimidated by people with more money or a higher position or status. They do not take responsibility for their leadership style, but place fault on others and will ignore the situation when an apology is in order.

4.) An Inspiring Leader acknowledges their strengths and weaknesses. They surround themselves with people that complement their weaknesses and capitalize on their own strengths. A Controlling Leader denies their strengths and tries to cover up their weaknesses. They surround themselves with people who are less talented than themselves to make themselves look good.

5.) An Inspiring Leader will be solution-oriented, helping others to identify and solve their problems. A Controlling Leader will be problem-oriented focusing on the negative and what’s wrong or who’s wrong and stay stuck in the problem.

6.) An Inspiring Leader is always giving the credit away to others where a Controlling Leader will not only take the credit, but will do so even if it isn’t theirs to take! As Lee Iacoca said, “One can accomplish great things when they no longer care who gets the credit.”

7.) An Inspiring Leader builds people up, empowers them to really go for it and spawns other authentic leaders. They provide direction and guidance and encourage others to believe in themselves. A Controlling Leader keeps people down below their “level” wanting them to stay dependent and small. They provide very little direction and act as if they know it all.

8.) An Inspiring Leader unites the people in their family or organization. They pass on positive feedback that creates respect and unity among others where a Controlling Leader will pass on gossip and negative feedback creating division.

9.) An Inspiring Leader creates an open forum for ideas to flow freely from everyone and encourages others to express their ideas. A Controlling Leader creates a forum for their own ideas and has a deep-seated need for it to be their idea and their way, becoming defensive or reactive to others feedback.

10.) An Inspiring Leader is emotionally connected to what’s going on within the organization or family. They understand that quality time is not planned but is spontaneous and comes with quantity time. They feel the energy of those around them. They remember where they’ve come from and maintain compassion for others. A Controlling Leader “leads from the desk”, and is out of touch with what’s really going on within the dynamics and energy of the organization. They forget where they’ve come from and end up making decisions that can hurt people.

This list of characteristics helps to raise our awareness as to whether we are coming from a controlling or inspiring place in our lives. Awareness is the starting point to change. The next step is learning how to uncover the issue and/or suppressed energy within us that was causing us to control in the first place. Once the issue has been correctly identified, now we can release it, should we choose to. These are the keys to becoming an Inspiring Leader on a more consistent basis.

© 2006 Dale Halaway - Inspiring Seminars, LLC - www.SeminarsThatInspire.com

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FOOD ADDICTIONS: Emotional or Physical?

Lisa — Fri, 20 Oct 2006 02:07:22 GMT

Author: Lisa Ulshafer

There are a lot of people in the world today who feel that they are addicted to food. A great deal of the focus around food has been placed on the “emotional” addiction. The question that is becoming more prevalent however is, “Can we actually be physically addicted to the foods we eat, outside of the realm of emotional eating?” Study after study has shown, absolutely!

The 3 major culprits....white refined sugar, white refined salt and white refined flour. If you took a tally of how much of these 3 substances you have consumed just in the past 24 hours, you may be unpleasantly surprised how much you have put into your body!

Now all 3 of these substances in their natural form, don’t pose a problem. It is in the refinement process that they can literally become deadly through the health problems that result through their improper consumption. It is through the refinement process that these natural foods become unnatural chemicals that our bodies were not built to process. The addiction lies not in these natural foods but the chemicals that they have become during the refinement process. Literally every nutritional element is stripped away;

The leader of the culprits and most damaging is white refined sugar. You know the one, it hides in your kitchen calling out to you every so often, or maybe everyday. That sweet tooth craving that pops up within you to rear it’s ugly head scouring the cupboards or fridge for a tasty little treat or a pint of Ben & Jerry’s! Refined sugar being the most significant of the three in the life of a Diabetic, places a greater importance on really taking a look at sugar in particular.

There are steps you can take in overcoming these food addictions:

STEP ONE: Acknowledging the fact that it exists.

If you think, “Hey, I’m not addicted to food, no way!”. Try going 3 days without these specific foods and see what you are like. Are you edgy, irritable, depressed, angry, consumed by thoughts of these foods? Addiction is a common way we use to suppress negative emotions that we haven’t resolved in a healthy way. For many, we are not even conscious of the fact that we are engaging in this process. By approaching the addiction both from a physical and emotional standpoint, we can start to free ourselves from having food control us and start having a healthy control over that which we put into our bodies.

STEP TWO: Become AWARE of what you are putting into your body.

Refined sugar comes in many forms. Check out the ingredients, learn them, know them, look for them and AVOID them. If you are drizzling sugar laden sauces over healthy vegetables, you are defeating the whole purpose of eating healthy vegetables!

STEP THREE: Make healthier choices.

Popping a handful of candy into your mouth to stabilize your blood sugar isn’t the healthiest of choices. Your pancreas and organs are already challenged by Diabetes, why place additional challenges on these organs by consuming chemicals? PAY ATTENTION! Be conscious of your choices. Reach for a natural source of sugar like fruit to aid you in your Diabetic lifestyle, or ANY lifestyle.

STEP FOUR: Resolving the emotional components.

Release the negative emotions that you are suppressing through food in a healthy way. There may be a lot of fear and resistance in doing so, but the longer you use food to keep these emotions suppressed, the louder they will become. Addressing what emotions drive you to put these foods into your body and releasing and resolving the emotions can be the greatest freedom of all.

The greater goal in overcoming a sugar or food addiction, or any addiction for that matter is not about losing weight or preventing cavities...the greater goal is to have mastery of our bodies. Once we have mastery of our bodies, we can begin to have mastery of our minds and ultimately mastery of our lives.

© 2006 Lisa Ulshafer - www.LasVegasLifeCoach.com

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Universal Laws for Personal & Professional Success

Lisa — Fri, 20 Oct 2006 02:06:22 GMT

Author: Dale Halaway

For some, success comes easy and others it has been difficult. Some have found the success they were looking for and then proceeded to consciously (or unconsciously) sabotage it. The truth is, success is available to us all and we all deserve to have an abundance of it. It can be mastered by those who choose to live their life in alignment with Universal Law - a network of higher ground principles which point the way to a life of harmony, authenticity and simplicity.

When we consciously use these higher ground principles in our life, we can transform and accomplish anything (as long as we are not imposing our will upon others.) For these are the laws that govern our personal and professional success or failure, depending on how we choose to use them.

We live in a Universe of Law and Order. These are definite laws that apply to every activity in life... the unseen forces that make or break every individual and or company. An individual is positive or negative, happy or miserable, rich or poor, depending on how effectively they work with the laws of their own nature. These timeless laws are completely impersonal... Universal Law is here for us to use as we choose. The word "Universal" implies they are for everyone... applying to any and every situation in life.

These laws are immutable. Whether we are aware of them or not, they operate 100% of the time - all the time - every time. The Law of Cause and Effect is just as real as the Law of Gravity. They include such laws as the Law of Discovery, Law of Manifestation, Law of Transformation, Law of Mental Equivalency, and the Law of Attraction. To better understand what causes success in our life, we will explore two principles in this article: The Law of Cause and Effect & The Law of Reflection.

One of the multitude of ways in which the Law of Cause and Effect operates is that the energy we send out through our thoughts, words and deeds (known as cause), eventually returns to us in our everyday life experiences (known as effect). The Law of Reflection teaches us that our outer world (known as effect) is a direct reflection of our inner world (known as cause). We never see the cause; we only see the effect, which loudly affirms the nature of its cause.

If our tendency has been to deal with the effects in our personal or professional life instead of seeking out and correcting the cause... then, the effect will simply repeat itself. It must... it's Universal Law. Whether our experience is one of reoccurring headaches or a repetitive pattern of high turnover in our business there is a cause - a reason as to why it is happening or it wouldn't be happening. Every effect has its cause and every cause has its effect.

In the case of healing a physical ailment like reoccurring headaches we need to acknowledge that the aching feeling felt in the head is an effect - not a cause. If you want the headaches to go away once and for all, you must identify and deal directly with the cause. Some have come to my seminars with a headache... I will help them to release the thoughts and feelings that were causing their head to hurt and the headache goes away.

Our attitude is a reflection of what's going on within. A business that's loaded with difficulties and hard times could be the effect of one’s negative thoughts, emotional imbalances, insecurities, lack of direction and goals, or negative control dynamics that are motivated by some inner fear (the cause). These effects are great teachers... for when we operate our lives on higher ground, we recognize pain and dysfunction as a signal that is telling us something isn't working. Life is our greatest teacher and it teaches us, by cause and effect. Our life consistently mirrors back to us what is going on inside of us... be it positive or negative, this is the Law of Reflection.

If we're working in an organization and we've been silently thinking of and resenting the fact we are underpaid -- that we are not appreciated -- that we deserve more money - greater recognition - we are subconsciously severing our ties with that organization. The individual has set this law in motion and one day will experience the effects, which loudly affirms the nature of its cause and the operating manager/leader eventually says to this individual... “we have to let you go.” Actually, the individual let themselves go by their own repetitive pattern of self-sabotaging thoughts and negative feelings. It's our dominant thoughts and feelings that influence the quality of our words and actions. This is what Ralph Waldo Emerson meant when he said, "The origin of every action is a thought."

Every so often, we pretend that we were the victim, we had nothing to do with it... it just happened. Success does not happen by accident and neither does failure. Things do not happen, as many people in the past have thought, they come to pass and are a result of conscious or unconscious beliefs, intentions, motivations, choices and habitual patterns of thinking, feeling and speaking. The energy we send out returns to us in the form of our own life experiences. In other words, whatever we habitually think, feel, say or do will eventually return to us in like manner. It's the Boomerang Principle, "what goes around, does come around."

Wisdom is knowing in advance what the effect will be of a cause. Your thought patterns and feelings live in the inner world of cause and are the seeds for future deeds. The only thing that will move you to a higher place in life is the quality of your thoughts and feelings. Raise the quality and vibration of your thoughts and feelings today and you'll change your life for the better tomorrow.

When we consciously choose words and deeds that bring happiness and success to others, the fruit of our karma becomes happiness and success. Discipline yourself to think kind thoughts when thinking of others. Thinking kind and positive thoughts causes you to feel better about you and your world. Remember, you are creating your future experiences with your most repetitive "NOW" thoughts. Learning how to release those thoughts you don’t want to have manifest in your day to day reality is the key.

© 2006 Dale Halaway - Inspiring Seminars, LLC - www.SeminarsThatInspire.com

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That Tricky Little Devil Within: The Negative Ego at Work, and it’s BUSY!

Lisa — Fri, 20 Oct 2006 02:04:38 GMT

Author: Dale Halaway

I call it the negative ego. It has also been referred to as the tricky little devil within. It is our opposition. Everybody's got one and we can learn a great deal from it. It can influence you without you even knowing it. It can influence what you choose, how you act, even in the way you choose to speak and you probably don’t even know it. That's how tricky this little guy or gal can be and yet you're the one who is responsible for the dismantling or transcending of your own negative ego. It is your greatest opposition. It’s important to remember, the greater the opposition… the greater the opportunity for personal and spiritual growth.

The negative ego has a defined set of objectives. 1.) Sabotage - The negative ego wants to sabotage some aspect of your life. It might be your health, your finances, your relationships, or it might be your career. When sabotage shows up in your life you can be assured it's the negative ego that has been influencing your choices, your actions and even your words. 2.) Destruction - If you're not paying attention to the signs of sabotage it can move into some form of destruction. As above, it could destroy some aspect of your physical body, your finances, your relationships, or your career. 3.) Death - The negative ego’s primary objective is to influence you to the point where you commit to some act of death. Again, it could be the death of some financial success, the death of a career, the death of a relationship or marriage, or in some cases a physical death.

There are many ways the negative ego uses to achieve its objectives. It’s never satisfied and does its best work when it can keep you in a wanting energy. A wanting energy is a lacking energy. Want means to lack. The way the negative ego stays in power is to keep you in a wanting mode. Most people, once they establish what they want, never get past this point and often have gotten stuck in this wanting energy. This is why some haven’t been achieving their goals. What manifests in your day-to-day reality is what you are holding in your consciousness. If you are holding in your consciousness a wanting energy, that is exactly what you will get, more wanting. This is why you have people on the planet who are lacking all kinds of things including money, love, abundance, freedom and so on. Their negative ego has tricked them into staying in this wanting energy and as long as you stay in this wanting energy you will always be lacking something because wanting means lack!

There are three areas that the negative ego uses to influence us into wanting. 1.) Control - The negative ego tricks you into believing that the way to getting or having control is by wanting it. As long as you are wanting for control, what happens is you don't have it. Instead it seems likes you have everything under control or you are spinning out of control. 2.) Approval - Our negative ego also tricks us into wanting for approval. This is somebody who gets themselves into relationships or partnerships where they are desperately seeking the approval of somebody outside of themselves. As long as it can keep you wanting for approval, you'll never get it. In fact, you could literally be in the presence of somebody who has the ability to approve of you and there they are approving of you, but it won't be good enough. Or, you'll attract people in your life that have not learned yet how to approve of themselves, so no matter how hard you try to win their approval, they can't give you what they don't have. Imagine going to somebody because you want $100,000. This person tells you they don’t have $100,000 but all you know is you want $100,000 and more specifically you want it from this particular person who cannot give it to you. How productive is that? You have people who literally attract people into their lives that haven’t learned how to approve of themselves yet, but they are convinced that this is the person that needs to give them approval. From the negative ego's perspective this is a perfect play, because it keeps you in this wanting for approval energy which can leave one feeling like they are spinning out of control. They continue trying even harder for this person’s approval, to no avail. 3.) Safety/Security - The third area the negative ego wants to trick you is in wanting to feel safe or secure. You might hook your wanting for safety into another person to feel safe. What ends up happening is this person, at some point feels like they are in your vice-grip because you need to keep them in your little personal space in order to keep you safe. Safety and control work hand-in-hand because when you have a deep safety issue then you also have to have some sort of control to keep everything in place to stay so-called safe. Safe from what? This is the question I often ask in my seminars. The truth is, we are to have control, approval, and safety. It’s our wanting it that keeps us from having it.

Another way the negative ego stays in power is to keep you on automatic. The more robotic you are in your day-to-day existence, the better for the negative ego. From the negative ego's perspective this is perfect because if you live your life on automatic long enough, eventually you will wake up one morning feeling so depressed and unfulfilled that you will have reached a very empty, and in some cases a very dark place. It will appear that your life has no more juice, no more joy, no more freedom. This is exactly where the negative ego wants you to be.

Everybody has a negative ego and you'll have it until you learn how to strip it of its power and influence over you. How did you get this little guy or gal? Somewhere along the way you decided to deny who you are and what you really value. You decided to bury your negative feelings by suppressing them or escaping from them because it was too scary, or too painful, or maybe you just didn't know how to process them correctly. The moment you made that decision to start burying your stuff as a way to keep yourself safe from it, as a way to survive through it, whenever that moment began for you, that's when you gave birth to the negative ego. From my experience in working with others, most have their ego in judgment and didn’t even know it. And whatever we hold in judgment we lock into place. So from the perspective of the negative ego… this is another perfect play.

How much power and influence does your negative ego have? Depending on how long you have been doing this determines how much power your negative ego presently holds. You created this and because you created it, it's your job to uncreate it, it's your job to dismantle it. Even though it’s your job, more than likely you will require the help of someone else to guide you through the process. So what if you choose not to? If you choose not to, you just made your negative ego happy, if you will, and of course, gave it a little more power. The negative ego does its best work when we pretend like we don't have one. For us to think we don't have one is incorrect thinking and over time it will end up wiping us out.

How do you dismantle the negative ego? By releasing the layers of old suppressed negative energy that we’ve been holding on to somewhere in our consciousness. It needs negative energy in order to perform its function. Transform all of the negative energy into positive energy and the negative ego dissolves. This is the process of transformation… letting go of limiting thoughts and negative feelings. If we’re still experiencing limitation in any aspect of our life, we haven’t let go of all of our limiting beliefs yet. A limiting belief is made up of nothing more than a unified thought and an emotion. As the late and great Lester Levenson said, “When our thoughts and feelings are completely released, there is nothing left but our real self.” By clearing out your negative thoughts and emotions from your subconscious, you will begin to feel lighter, happier and freer. In fact, this ought to become your gauge. Every time we release a chunk of old negative energy… we’ll discover or receive something positive. We constantly hear stories of where someone successfully releases a chunk of negative material and shortly thereafter amounts of money ranging from $100 to $20,000 or more literally show up without them doing anything at all, or they lose a significant amount of weight without even trying. You will also notice after every release it’s easier to trust and believe in yourself. As you believe in yourself a little more, and then a little more, at some point your belief transcends into a knowing and you move into a knowing-that-you-know state of consciousness. And when you come from your knowing, you will no longer be afraid of your doing.

It's quite amazing when you allow yourself to open up to this knowledge. It will literally open up a way for you to experience your life very differently. You will show up differently. You will notice that you are making different choices, better choices, wiser choices, and as a result, your life becomes easier. You are living less in your head and more in your body. Your mind becomes quieter. Success begins to show up naturally, rather than you always having to chase after it. You become healthier and happier in all aspects of your life. This is what we really deserve!

© 2006 Dale Halaway - Inspiring Seminars, LLC - www.SeminarsThatInspire.com

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