I come to you
to share my story
to gain new strength
to share my wisdom
My story is like this.
Both parents unwed and users
Pregnancy came and father went clean Mother did not
Mother and my fathers best friend were drugged up father walked in to take her home
Fathers friend killed my DAD by a form of martial arts
~The Next DAY I was born~
Dropped off from one horrible place to the next finally @ age 5 I found a stable home
I will Speed up to more current
Junior and senior year of college Diagnosed with Breast Cancer
During senior year boyfriend maxed out two credit cards of mine and cheated on me
Better Times: I am currently @ graduation time although in debt 100,000 I will be the first to graduate with both bachelors and an MBA.
For years I have been the cheerful happy one despite some of undesirable parts of my unfortunate upbringing but now as I get older I have less tolerance for betrayal by loved ones more or less my significant other.
I have always been the strong one not having to lean on others. However I feel tired and weak of being so strong and alone. I have been looking for that someone to uplift me or cradle me in that safety zone.
I am glad to have joined this group and hope great advice follows!
to share my story
to gain new strength
to share my wisdom
My story is like this.
Both parents unwed and users
Pregnancy came and father went clean Mother did not
Mother and my fathers best friend were drugged up father walked in to take her home
Fathers friend killed my DAD by a form of martial arts
~The Next DAY I was born~
Dropped off from one horrible place to the next finally @ age 5 I found a stable home
I will Speed up to more current
Junior and senior year of college Diagnosed with Breast Cancer
During senior year boyfriend maxed out two credit cards of mine and cheated on me
Better Times: I am currently @ graduation time although in debt 100,000 I will be the first to graduate with both bachelors and an MBA.
For years I have been the cheerful happy one despite some of undesirable parts of my unfortunate upbringing but now as I get older I have less tolerance for betrayal by loved ones more or less my significant other.
I have always been the strong one not having to lean on others. However I feel tired and weak of being so strong and alone. I have been looking for that someone to uplift me or cradle me in that safety zone.
I am glad to have joined this group and hope great advice follows!
-
Re: I come to you...
Tue, April 3, 2007 - 7:08 AMAmazing story - incrdedible strength.
You have continued to fight and I feel certain you will continue to do so.
We all get tired. it is perfectly normal. The key is in realizing what is taking place.
When we are unaware we let our defenses down and the vultures move in. You don't need any more vultures.
You said,
"I have been looking for that someone to uplift me or cradle me in that safety zone."
I say you don't need anyone to uplift you. You are perfectly capable on your own.
What if instead you began to look for someone to simply share the ups and downs with?
Instead of looking for someone to complete you what if you looked for someone to stand beside you?
It is a much more healthy place to be. Believe me I speak from experience.
When we find someone to hold us up then we end up having to become what they want us to be or
they might put us back down. A horrible way to live. Constant fear.
Remember, there are still a lot of good decent people out there. There are still people who are
looking for the very same thing you are. I simply think that sometimes when we get sick and tired
we loose our ability to see clearly what it is we truly desire. Thats when mistakes creep in through the cracks.
Just some rambling thoughts from someone who has been there.
NAMASTE
-
Re: I come to you...
Wed, April 25, 2007 - 3:30 AMthank you for sharing...i know a hard rock story,too..and have an M.A. for some years now..it's a good feeling to be able to look back - not on what you see maybe, but to be a survivor. love yourself, care for yourself first without thinking you're egotistic, without any intention of harm...then, naturally you'll behave the same way towards 'the world'. i guess, it's a safe way to love. christy
