I love my job, but my tiny department (all five of us) just got moved to the fucking NOISIEST PART OF THE WHOLE FUCKING BUILDING.

So this is to them...and yeah I know I'm yelling:

I AM AN EDITOR. TV EDITORS NEED TO BE ABLE TO HEAR WHAT THE FUCK THEY'RE WORKING ON. I HAVE FANCY NOISE-CANCELLING HEADPHONES BUT CAN STILL HEAR THE RIDICULOUS AMOUNT OF NOISE THAT IS IN THIS AREA.

YOU MOVED US RIGHT NEAR THE FRONT DOOR, WHICH MAKES A 'BING' NOISE EVERY TIME IT'S OPENED. YOU PUT US RIGHT NEAR THE MAIN STAIRWAY AND DIRECTLY UNDERNEATH A WALKWAY WHICH HAS A METAL GRATE BOTTOM...MEANING THAT IF ANYONE SPILLS THEIR COFFEE, IT GOES ON MY HEAD--AND ALL OVER YOUR EXPENSIVE EQUIPMENT.

YOU MOVED US RIGHT NEXT TO THE KITCHEN AREA--THE ONE PLACE LEFT IN OUR COMPANY WHERE PEOPLE CAN CONGREGATE SOCIALLY. THIS MEANS THAT BETWEEN 9-10AM, 12-1PM AND AROUND 4PM IT GETS EVEN LOUDER SINCE PEOPLE GATHER TO MAKE FOOD, TALK ABOUT THEIR WEEKENDS, AND CHAT. I DO NOT WANT TO STOP THEM FROM CHATTING...NO ONE SHOULD BE SITTING HERE SO FUCKING CLOSE TO THEM!!

I HAD NO IDEA HOW MANY WOMEN WEAR HIGH HEELS IN THIS COMPANY--NOW I DO. MANY, MANY WOMEN HERE WEAR HIGH HEELS THAT GO CLICKETY-CLACK WITH EVERY GODDAMN STEP THEY TAKE.

THANKS FOR PUTTING ME IN DIRECT EYE-LINE TO EVERY SINGLE PERSON COMING DOWN THE MAIN STAIRS. LET'S NOT FORGET THOSE THAT SHOUT THINGS FROM HALFWAY DOWN THE STAIRS TO PEOPLE ACROSS MY FLOOR. MY DEPARTMENT HAS ALREADY INSTITUTED A TOTAL-IGNORE-RESPONSE TO ANYONE TRYING TO TALK TO US FROM THE STAIRS. FUCK YOU, COME ALL THE WAY DOWN HERE YOU LAZY MOTHERFUCKERS.

AN EVEN LARGER FUCK-YOU TO THOSE PEOPLE WITH GIGANTIC LUXURIOUS CUBICLES UPSTAIRS WHO NOW LOOK AT US WITH PITY AS THE DESCEND THE STAIRS. YEAH, I'M TALKING TO YOU, ONLINE DEPARTMENT. DON'T THINK WE DON'T KNOW HOW UNFAIR IT IS THAT YOU STILL HAVE AS MUCH SPACE AS YOU DO WHILE WE ARE NOW SITTING IN A SPACE THAT WAS NEVER MEANT FOR PEOPLE TO SIT IN.

Company, I need quiet in order to work. And the fact is that it is simply a stunning amount of noise in here. This is just about the poorest planning I have ever fucking seen, and this company is supposed to be progressive? GO FUCK YOURSELF.