Well, I started going back to 12-step meetings in my area. The compassionate support is what I need and i realize now that some folks get their recovery quickly and some get theirs slowly. I'm apparently a slowly and I believe my life work is about gentle and steady support for myself and others. I am being VERY attuned lately to shame and the role it plays in my life.
Tonight, I am really fixated on certain foods and I watch my mind try to laser in on them so I feel compelled to go act on the thoughts. For tonight, I do not need those foods. I am fine. I am dandy. I am not physically needing more food in this body. This body is what I need to keep attention on and not those burning laser-like thoughts of obsession and compulsion. Just for tonight.
I'm grateful for a meeting to go to tomorrow where I can be with others and hear their stories and spend a little time completely diverted from those thoughts that I am powerless over. I cannot stop them, but I can distract myself from them IF I stay aware and present.
I'm glad you all are out there. I reach out my cyber hands to you in support, in peace, in solidarity.
Much love,
Sage
Tonight, I am really fixated on certain foods and I watch my mind try to laser in on them so I feel compelled to go act on the thoughts. For tonight, I do not need those foods. I am fine. I am dandy. I am not physically needing more food in this body. This body is what I need to keep attention on and not those burning laser-like thoughts of obsession and compulsion. Just for tonight.
I'm grateful for a meeting to go to tomorrow where I can be with others and hear their stories and spend a little time completely diverted from those thoughts that I am powerless over. I cannot stop them, but I can distract myself from them IF I stay aware and present.
I'm glad you all are out there. I reach out my cyber hands to you in support, in peace, in solidarity.
Much love,
Sage
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SF Bay Area
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Re: Status
Fri, September 21, 2007 - 8:47 AMI wish there was a group I could go to in my area. Whenever I look up OA, they are either really far away or on days I have work or class. It makes me feel kind of hopeless 'cuz I know I do so much better when I have other people to relate with. I think it helps me to think of the problem more objectively instead of some private thing that is wrong with me. It sounds like you are doing real good, Sage. Thanks for your words..!
