i need to know your interpretation of this poem.
they're suposed to be song lirics but they don't have any music yet.
i've always liked the peaple in this tribe and the types of insitfull respectfull, kind harted responses that you always seem to com up with , i look forward to hearing your opinoins and interpretaions. :) thanks. love .
pourly writen caricters
drawing on the walls
leaving behind the things they wer
draging out lil pieces of peaple
beilding new faces to wer
a thousand lil shards all lined up
all glued on
all cut out
all stuck in
they stand out
you're fucked up
you're bleeding
the arangment
is fading
they're seeing
what you're hiding
run away , now , run away.
now take the time
now spend a dime
and call me.
now call me
and i'll pretend to listen, pretend to hear you , pretend i don't see you.
i want to be finding a way out , but insted i'll be crying,
a flood of emotion , i'll drink all i can but i'm drowning
i'm drowning
i ot to be finding a way out , insted i'm just locking my hart up
treding and dreding until you come and find me.
come find me.
they're suposed to be song lirics but they don't have any music yet.
i've always liked the peaple in this tribe and the types of insitfull respectfull, kind harted responses that you always seem to com up with , i look forward to hearing your opinoins and interpretaions. :) thanks. love .
pourly writen caricters
drawing on the walls
leaving behind the things they wer
draging out lil pieces of peaple
beilding new faces to wer
a thousand lil shards all lined up
all glued on
all cut out
all stuck in
they stand out
you're fucked up
you're bleeding
the arangment
is fading
they're seeing
what you're hiding
run away , now , run away.
now take the time
now spend a dime
and call me.
now call me
and i'll pretend to listen, pretend to hear you , pretend i don't see you.
i want to be finding a way out , but insted i'll be crying,
a flood of emotion , i'll drink all i can but i'm drowning
i'm drowning
i ot to be finding a way out , insted i'm just locking my hart up
treding and dreding until you come and find me.
come find me.
posted by:
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SF Bay Area
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Re: hi , i have a poem
Mon, July 2, 2007 - 2:03 AMHi Starbuck, they're not bad as lyrics, to me it sounds like you were pretty much inspired by something that happenend to ya! (might be wrong, but thats generally what happens to me...and not only am i talking about the facts, they can also be feelings).
Heres a little advice, cos you said they sound more like the lyrics to a song than just a poem, hu?
Have you ever tried singing them, just putting them into music that way, it may help. Try to imagine the rhythym they go with, how the words are stressed..., think about the intro verse, and most of all, what is the idea you wanna give? (Basically that should be within the chorus), and how about the 'atmosphere', it is tense, dark, mellow, soft, you should keep workin on it, not bad!!
