Folks, aw kin no longer run under this party's banner and aw kin no longer support this heyaw tribe. It is infested with communists and TOU snitches.
Aw am proud to announce ma bid fer president as an ind'pendent.
Yew kin join ma new polit'cal partee at:
tribes.tribe.net/f32a135a-...15b76847a5
Vote fer Gov'ner. Vote early. Vote often.
Aw am proud to announce ma bid fer president as an ind'pendent.
Yew kin join ma new polit'cal partee at:
tribes.tribe.net/f32a135a-...15b76847a5
Vote fer Gov'ner. Vote early. Vote often.
posted by:
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Unsu...
Yeah. The gov'ner told me he would support the legalization of marijuana, so I am going to go toke over at his mansion. Bye bye.
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Unsu...
What the fuck? Man, there is a big pile o' shit in the corner. Are you people a bunch of savages or what? I'm outta here.
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Unsu...
<<What the fuck? Man, there is a big pile o' shit in the corner. Are you people a bunch of savages or what? I'm outta here.>>
It's just me, and as a member of this tribe I have a right to be here. I would also ask you to mind your feet and avoid stepping on me. Failure to heed this simple caution will result in certain unpleasant consequences.
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Unsu...
Oh, don't be such a pouty little child, Gov'ner. You can't just up and quit now! Remember: you are runnin' for Pres'dent, not Moderator. Whatever possessed you to run for that thankless, miniscule, mind-numbingly annoying position in the first place? As a candidate for Pres'dent you need a separate person to delegate the Moderator job to, so you can stay focused on the big picture.
Can't you remember anything I taught you about strategy whilst you was married to me? -
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I respect you tremendously, Gov'ner, in fact I respect you more than I respect my daddy, and I respect you as much as my Grampaw who was the finest man on the face of the earth, but I have to say to you: Sir, I ain't no Communist!
I'm a renegade Socialist!
But I will admit to you that I once actually kissed a Communist.
Anyhow, I am still fervently supporting the candidacy of Gov'ner for President because we need you for President before this country goes straight down the turnpike. We need a REAL Southern gentleman in office and not just a synthetic substitute. And I don't want to get involved in no backbiting because as I said, I respect you Sir. Plus my teeth ain't what they used to be. -
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Unsu...
That slippery eel of a Gov'ner. I got unfinished business to settle up. Jess cuz I posed nekkid don't mean men in politics need to take advantage of womins like me. Ah just was rendered speechless when the gov had his trousers off in two shakes of a sheeps tail and I seen a member that done defied the laws of gravity. That water witchin stick went for my privates faster than a greased jack rabbit.
So all I gotta say is the sun don't shine on the same dogs tail all the time. I'll git you when y'all git 'lected President.. -
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Unsu...
Aw did not have sexual relations with that woman.
Define "is." -
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If it was a member that defied the laws of gravity, your hat would have been stained and not the leggings, but this does not take into account other important factors such as geographical location, physical position, and the Bernoulli principle.
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Unsu...
Scuze me. I did mention the witchin' stick? I'm the spring, The witchin' stick finds the water. Y'alls can throw out the bernewli principle or whatever. And it wasn't in the North Hon, it was deep in the South. Physical position, I'm not goin there.
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Unsu...
Jonz, you know you jumped on the gov'ner the way a horny dog will hump your leg. You were all over him and took advantage of his intoxicated condition.
Come by my lawyer's office and we'll cut you a check for $3,000 and you'll sign a release and a confidentiality agreement. Or, if you prefer, we'll buy you a 1977 Trans Am. $3,000 or a Trans AM. Whaddya say? That's good money for a common whore like you.
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Unsu...
Damn, you're one ugly looking bitch, Paula. I'm sorry, I could not help but blurt out my observation, on the account of the fact that you are butt ugly. UGLY.
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Looks ain't everything. A Southern woman knows how to make the most of what the good Lord gave her, and if her finer points lie south of the border (so to speak), then that's just how it goes. And no man can stand in her way. She won't just sit on her assets, she will use them to her advantage to get money, or at least a new Trans Am.
The Gov'ner was doubtless led down the old Primrose Path of S-E-X and I think this proves that he has a grip on the real issues. Because S-E-X is what drives everything from politics to puppet shows. And sometimes both at the same time. He can't be blamed because he was led astray by the siren song of Cooter Unlimited. No, we all know that a president who's busy chasing tail won't be tapping our phone lines or getting us involved in a war with Slovakia. -
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Unsu...
I agree that looks ain't everything, but I cannot imagine that this Paula bitch can fuck worth a damn, either.
She's just trash, trying to ensnare our Gov'ner with her trashy snatch.
The Gov'ner can (and has) done much better, and will continue to do better, or else my name is not "The Mack Daddy Pimp Satan."
You doubt the gov'ner's ways with the ladies? You should spend a football game Friday night in a small Texas town with the Gov'ner. By Sunday, he has knocked up half the cheer leading squad and has deflowered most of the girls choir. To say nothing of the contributions he has made to revenue of the local brothel and the hot middle aged housewives he has left with smiles on their faces.
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