Something to think about

topic posted Sun, August 12, 2007 - 3:10 PM by  Sluggo
Last weekend, I had to work at a fairy pirate festival out in the woods, and have returned with a mess of raw data that needs to be assimilated and codified and braided and ironed-out and I don't know what all. Plus I have to wash a lot of things. But I had some insights out there in the woods, and these insights may be helpful to HDT. I took notes but I can't read them. And my brain hurts.

But I tried to make the most of this valuable opportunity to learn more about what makes humans go out and spend money on "entertainment" and how you can herd these humans into an enclosed space and make them pay more money. Even if the space is infested with geese and hippies and many many many many many many bloodsucking insects and hippies, and high humidity, and fat hippies dressed up as fairies with their titties hanging out. Big saggy ugly titties, too. Even on the women.

This may be a new and exciting phase of my research, or it will be after I get done feeling all swoopy from being covered with large amounts of hydrocortisone cream. But I live to serve, I truly do, and do not regret my weekend as guinea pig.
posted by:
Sluggo
Chicago
  • Re: Something to think about

    Sun, August 12, 2007 - 4:24 PM
    honesty is the worst policy when it comes to dealing with the soul snatching deviants we're dealing with during these barbaric times.
    • Re: Something to think about

      Sun, August 12, 2007 - 9:11 PM
      Gitmo has had problems with lightworkers as well.
      • Re: Something to think about

        Tue, August 14, 2007 - 7:51 PM
        But do they have itch mites? (I left the fest COVERED with this, BTW...still feel putrid) This brings a level of ultra-fun to any event and I bet they work really, really cheap.

        BUG TRAPS TO BE ANALYZED FOR ITCH MITE
        By James Janega | Tribune staff reporter
        6:12 PM CDT, August 14, 2007

        Illinois public health officials today collected bug traps left out overnight in the Chicago area to determine if a rash of reports of a skin irritation in recent days might be the work of a dreaded southern summer pest: the itch mite.

        So far, officials say, it might be the itch mite, or it might not.

        "Technically, from a science standpoint, we really want to be careful. We don't know what it was," said Kitty Loewy, spokeswoman for the Cook County Department of Public Health.

        "It looks like it, sounds like it, feels like it," Loewy said. "We want to be really careful about this."

        So far the only evidence officials have is anecdotal—splotchy, scratchy rashes from area residents who had spent time in forest preserves, golf courses and local parks.

        Public health officials released data this afternoon that showed at least 288 cases of suspicious rashes since Aug. 1 had been reported in suburban Cook County, with more elsewhere.

        Hundreds more rash cases were investigated at emergency rooms without a connection.

        They number of cases seemed to peak Sunday, when more than 50 were reported. The most cases, 27, came from Chicago Heights, followed by 18 cases in Streamwood and 17 cases in Palatine, according to county data broken down by zip code. More than two dozen zip codes were affected.

        County officials also released information from studies in Kansas and Nebraska of the oak leaf gall mite, Pyemotes herfsi, which is thought to be the same as or similar to the mystery mite affecting people in Illinois.

        That mite feeds on the larvae of a type of fly that lays eggs in oak trees. When its food source runs out, the mites drop out of the trees and float on the wind in search of other hosts. Though they do not feed off of humans, their powerful venom causes severe irritation as they probe soft, wet flesh for other food sources.

        Sticky traps were set in area parks and on private property Monday night, said Melanie Arnold, spokeswoman for the Illinois Department of Public Health. Scratching victims had visited the wooded areas before seeing symptoms, she said.

        This morning, the traps were being collected and sent to a Chicago-area laboratory to be reviewed by entomologists.

        The work could confirm whether the Chicago culprit is the same species of itch mite that caused scratching outbreaks in Kansas, Nebraska, Missouri and Texas in 2004. The bug in those cases also can drop with leaves or branches onto unsuspecting victims below. Victims and public health officials have said that many of the reported cases of itching are on the shoulders, torso and arms.

        The victim doesn't feel the bite or experience symptoms for 12 to 16 hours. Showering within four hours of contact can prevent the pests from moving from clothing to skin, state health officials say. Wearing a DEET-based insect repellent also deters the mites, along with mosquitoes and other summer pests. The itch mite does not carry diseases such as West Nile virus, Loewy said.
        • Re: Something to think about

          Tue, August 14, 2007 - 10:03 PM
          I'm interested in the powerful venom of the itch mite. Many of our Protestant clients would be pleased if we converted this substance to aerosol. If we can separate it from the cause, I imagine we have something to back up the myth of a hairy hand correlation to excessive masturbation and/or foosball -- allowing our good american stock increased motivation toward raising standards.

          <<<So far, officials say, it might be the itch mite, or it might not. >>>

          I'll have our CDC connects collect the traps and replace them with some neutralized ringers for tomorrow morning. That way we can make sure the speculators are blaming God by the weekend.
          • Re: Something to think about

            Thu, August 21, 2008 - 8:55 AM
            Hairy hand + itch mite + masturbation = The hand of God ?
            Is there a koozie wid dat ??? If you throw in some beer I might be more interested in that religious shit.
            • Re: Something to think about

              Thu, August 21, 2008 - 8:05 PM
              If by koozie, you mean therapeutic cold water immersion baths, the answer is yes.
              • Re: Something to think about

                Thu, August 21, 2008 - 9:39 PM
                Cold water's no good for masturbation. It could do a good job keepin my sixer cold though. Therapy? Isn't that just another word for self-control ? I got no room in my life for that.
                • Re: Something to think about

                  Thu, August 21, 2008 - 10:07 PM
                  It really depends how cold it is. Masturbating in a 37° cold water immersion bath and then jumping a 55° immersion bath to jerk off is allegedly spectacular. Many of those who participate say it's like hanging from a doorknob to masturbate, only without having the need to explain away that pesky rope burn.
                  • This is the maximum depth. Additional responses will not be threaded.

                    Re: Something to think about

                    Thu, August 21, 2008 - 10:31 PM
                    Sounds like yer kinky. I try not to think that much when I'm masturbating.I just want a level place to set my whisky.

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