Allow me to translate!

Darian P
Internet Marketing
Mission District
Here for: getting the word out to join Tribe.net!!!
Darian is a Tribe employee. View all Tribe staff.
Date Mon, April 3, 2006 - 6:01 PM
Subject Exciting Changes on Tribe

Message

We want to take this opportunity to tell you about some exciting changes that you'll see and experience on Tribe in the coming weeks. As always we want and need your feedback, suggestions, and ideas. Feel free to mail me directly or send an email to feedback@tribe.net.

----- Keep in mind that anything you suggest will be ignored!

These changes are scheduled to go into affect the week of April 11th but we wanted to give you a "head's up".

----- We're hoping that you can see things from our viewpoint, namely, where our head is up at.

The New Tribe Homepage
You've sent us a lot of valuable feedback on the member homepage, and we want even more! When you login to Tribe, you'll see a link at the top of the page that will allow you to test drive a few of our new designs for the member homepage.

----- We've now lost so many users to MySpace and Free-Ass that we're now in panic mode trying to pander up to you to show what good friends we are. We've even fired the two messengers we hire dto give the bad news, and now, I'm the next one on the chopping block. PLEASE LOVE THESE CHANGES, otherwis eit's my ass. They killed Wade, They axed Warren, now I'm next in line. Love the changes, and save my job.


The new designs will allow you to:
- view all of your tribes at once

----- Something most users already figure dout how to do, we'll make it easier for the stupid people out there

- see more "sidewalk" content (view listings, events, and reviews posted by your friends, or others in your network

----- Make it more like the old tribe everyone actually LIKED

- customize what kind of content you see on your homepage

----- We've only been dangleing this carrot for over a year, so we figure we better put out or shut up.


Add Video to your Profile
You'll be able to display video on your profile. Upload your video to Revver.com (a video content site), and then add a "My Revver Video Module" to your profile.

----- We're just not enough like MySpace. This should help us be more acceptabel to video spammers. Nobody wante dthis featire, and all teh users complained about video on profiles, so we'r ehoping this drives that last of you away. Maybe this will get us the VC that Jan is desperate for, but somehow I doubt it. 14yo's don't have VC.


Site-wide Search
We've had many requests in the past to be able to search the entire site (all of our different areas—people, tribes, jobs, reviews, events and more) at the same time.

----- Tribe is difficult for Stalkers and Date-Rapists to use. This should change that making it more friendly to them.

With site-wide search, located in the upper right-hand corner of the masthead, you'll be able to type in a term and get search results that cover the entire site all viewable by category so you can get to the right content lickety-split.

----- We don't want stalkers to have to look for the search, so we'll spam it on every page. We're pretty sure you can make this go away with RIP for firefox.

Bug fixes
Yes, were always out to find a bugs and squash them.

----- What you call a working feature, we call a bug.

As always, you're our best exterminators.

----- We're cheap fuckers blowing the VC on stupid interface changes. We prefer that you work for free and give us lot of ad clicks and do the work for us.

If you run into a bug don't hesitate to post it in the Tribe.net Bugs tribe at tribebugs.tribe.net.

----- So that we can promptly ignore it.

To see what we're fixing in detail go to the Release Notes tribe at releasenotes.tribe.net.

----- Please post things that are working perfectly so we can "Fix" those as well.


Best wishes to Wade!

----- They'll never find his body. NEVER! We buried it real good.

We want to wish Wade a fond farewell and a deeply felt thank you for his efforts over the last two years. He graciously took on some difficult tasks and handled them with aplomb. Good luck in your next venture!

----- Tribe 25, Outrageous Jobs, Image flagging, 2257 panic, Tribe Sanitation for the peopel of Godwin Texas, and let's not forget, a big proponet of this asstastic interface monstrosity that is giving everyone migraines and Grand Mal Seizures.


Member Icon Contest – Bragging Rights and $100!

----- Because at the rate we pay our designers, they can afford to spring $100 cash on you to do their job for them.

Please don't forget that we need your help with our redesign of the member icon in the masthead. To participate check out the contest guidelines at tribes.tribe.net/membersicon and follow Elliot's instructions. The winner gets a $100 Amazon gift certificate and the bragging rights

----- The gift certificates we get for free from amazon, so it's not liek we're actually out anything at all.


Thanks again for your commitment to Tribe and the Tribe community. Our service is built on the foundation that you are the most important feature.

----- This is just lip service, our actions and practice have shown we don't give two shits about you or anyone else, and I'm nothing more than the new cheerleading mouthpiece of tribe. How do you know I'm spewing forth the party line bullshit? My lips are moving!

Please continue to actively participate in our community and let us know what we can do to make your experience better.

----- Let's try to get the traffic and postings on the tribes back to what they were pre-interface change. OUr hits are dropping faster than the user base. Between low posted, increased flagging of all content, we're losing ground fast. Start posting and putting some content here because we don't want to go look for jobs.


Cheers,

Darian Patchin
Darian@tribe.net

----- Next one in line to get fired if you peopel don't get happy!


--S