This is the big challenge

my special brand of polarization is still polarization, not balance = even so, I have more balance today than in all days past

I speak about electromagnetism as the fundamental energetic pattern that all life is subject to

there is the electric brain and the magnetic root = the neutral part is my heart

now that my heart is reciprocating the electric with the magnetic, my electromagnetic essence (my light body) is circulating my entire matrix and my body is producing results!

I feel as though we all have body issues that plague us...as a group, the manifested spirits enjoyed shape-shifting for only so long (then heartson was locked in stone) - at which point each spirit ended up with distorted forms that made them ashamed to be seen. WE MOVED BACK FROM THAT PLACE IN SHAME AND HAVE BEEN ATTEMPTING TO RE-ESTABLISH OUR SHAPE-SHIFTING ABILITY, AS CLOSETED INDIVIDUALS, LIFETIME AFTER LIFETIME. STRUGGLING WITH BODY ALONE IN OUR SHAME!

death is for those who do not believe we will ever regain our lost ability

I STILL HAVE SHAME FROM BEING BORN INTO SELF-HATRED (BORN INTO THE GAP)
STILL HAVE SHAME ABOUT BEING ESTRANGED FROM BODY - WHY WANT SUCH A BRUTE?
Why do I need to resolve my differences with a rapist?
I HAD MY GUTS RIPPED OUT AND HAVE THE SCARS TO REMIND ME THAT ORANGE IS STILL SUFFERING

EVEN SO,

Why is He (Body) not disposable?
the death sentence has never rehabilitated body...and, He still seems to be a heartless brute - who i desperately need....i will love Him from afar

OH HOW I LOVE BODY
OH HOW I MISS HIS FLUID WAYS

I laid with my own battered body in the forest
wrapping my arms around myself
kissing my shoulders, arms and hands
feeling the enclosure and safety of my flesh
I am grateful that my body still serves me after having hated body for an eternity
I am grateful it is not too late to make amends to my flesh