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I ask this, because at one point, I'm sure I was... I was hurting so badly, and I really enjoyed those little ole vicodins. The relief it gave me was intoxicating. I could take a big deep breath and not hurt... not my eyes or my head or my stomach or my arms and legs.
I still have a prescripion for them, but I don't fill it anymore, I was freakin about addiction.
My main question is... what exactly is addiction to pain meds? I mean, if we are really sick, and it helps, is it better to suffer, and stay clean, or get rid of pain, and turn into addicts? what about the occasional drink?
I have pondered that, in case the cancer comes back. Should I forego the pills and just drink a Guinness.. wihch seems to wash away pain. I haven't had a drink in 26 years, and I wonder if it's better to re-=activate the alcoholism, and not suffer as much. Or pop pills. or just bite the bullet and try other ways.
Right now, I'm biting the bullet, and try to work through the pain, sometimes it works, sometimes it doesnt'. Todoay, I hurt, but take Tylenol when Ive had enough. I take Tylenol every single night. Ihaven't been able to swim these last few days, so am covered in a sweat from the pains in my stomach and head. Exercise helps, but no jogging when it's this hot.
And I decided that I'm not going to keep this struggle a secret, I like being able to let folks know of this battle. I am still not sure about whre I stand. At one point, I told my son to score me some weed! he's a grown up now, and flat out said no. He doesn't want to get stoned wtthi his mommy, and I have to agree with him. I'm not crazy about smoking illegal weeds, it makes me sick and paranoid.. the last thing I want during a cancer fight. no, I'm far too introspective as it is, going through and in and out of my brain cells would be pure agony. the idea is to get some rest and some quality time.
So, what do the rest of you folks do? if you hurt a lot? just wondering. I will say that now that I'm aware of how my ears perk up when pain meds are mentioned, I can avoid that pitfall. Wha'ts the point of surviving if my brain is fried on opiates?
xxxx
I still have a prescripion for them, but I don't fill it anymore, I was freakin about addiction.
My main question is... what exactly is addiction to pain meds? I mean, if we are really sick, and it helps, is it better to suffer, and stay clean, or get rid of pain, and turn into addicts? what about the occasional drink?
I have pondered that, in case the cancer comes back. Should I forego the pills and just drink a Guinness.. wihch seems to wash away pain. I haven't had a drink in 26 years, and I wonder if it's better to re-=activate the alcoholism, and not suffer as much. Or pop pills. or just bite the bullet and try other ways.
Right now, I'm biting the bullet, and try to work through the pain, sometimes it works, sometimes it doesnt'. Todoay, I hurt, but take Tylenol when Ive had enough. I take Tylenol every single night. Ihaven't been able to swim these last few days, so am covered in a sweat from the pains in my stomach and head. Exercise helps, but no jogging when it's this hot.
And I decided that I'm not going to keep this struggle a secret, I like being able to let folks know of this battle. I am still not sure about whre I stand. At one point, I told my son to score me some weed! he's a grown up now, and flat out said no. He doesn't want to get stoned wtthi his mommy, and I have to agree with him. I'm not crazy about smoking illegal weeds, it makes me sick and paranoid.. the last thing I want during a cancer fight. no, I'm far too introspective as it is, going through and in and out of my brain cells would be pure agony. the idea is to get some rest and some quality time.
So, what do the rest of you folks do? if you hurt a lot? just wondering. I will say that now that I'm aware of how my ears perk up when pain meds are mentioned, I can avoid that pitfall. Wha'ts the point of surviving if my brain is fried on opiates?
xxxx
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Arizona
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Re: does anyone have an addiction to pain meds?
Tue, September 4, 2007 - 9:45 AMIf you have pain, and you need your meds take them. Addiction is something that happens when you are taking more than you need. Not for taking what you need to keep functioning.
As someone that has a maintainace dose I can tell you. Sometimes you have to accept that you are not going to have a choice. If you are taking it for a buzz then you are cheating. Alcohol is not something to take for the killing of pain. Stay clean. You know when you have taken something that will stop a moose and you are feeling better and can do something that is interesting... that you have taken something that has beat the pain. Not to just take something to dull your life.
As silly as it sounds... Even people with addictive issues need pain meds when they need the medication. It isn't giving in, it isn't giving up, it isn't losing your sobriety. It is a medical issue that is between you and your medical team.
Myself... If I need the morphin and I take it then get up and get my shopping done because the pain is gone and I can. I am not strung out. I need it to get past the pain of the disease.
There is no shame in it. I am not having a good time. There is no buzz because I am just getting rid of pain, not making myself a zombie. Well in October I will... but that is another thing entirely. I don't have to take pain meds often any more. I have no shame issues when I do need it now . -
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Re: does anyone have an addiction to pain meds?
Tue, September 4, 2007 - 5:34 PMMargaret, there have been times when I hurt so much, I had to go to the ER, and the IV of percocet or vicodin didn't work, so they would then give me morphine, and it just took the edge off. That was it.. no happy floating junkie feeling, just almost up to base level maintenance. The way I see it, the drs. are so determined that I live and make them look good, they don't care much if I get strung out or not. Maybe they think I'
m going to die anyway. I really can't tell. And don't care. Because doing what I want and avoiding them has helped me immensely. I actually have hope and belief in my self. I see a future for me.
I don't know where this will all end up. Today, I bit the bullet, and it has been a good day.
I would prefer to get a nice massage a couple of times a week, to offset the pain. But it costs so much! And I don't have an outside job yet. (still looking).
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Re: does anyone have an addiction to pain meds?
Tue, September 4, 2007 - 3:25 PMDearest Lucy,
I agree with Margaret - take your pain medication as long as you need it to function with less (hopefully no) pain. If you're taking the meds just to "take them to get a buzz" that's addiction. Taking the meds to help you have a better quality of life when in pain is NOT addiction.
The alcohol is not an option for you. Stay sober. Don't take it.
I don't know if I ever told you, but I live with constant pain. I have a level of pain that I consider to be a normal or good day and then there are the days when I'm not sure I can even get out of bed; or the pain escalates so much during the day that by evening I'm crippled and crying. I haven't found an answer yet for my pain. I pop Tylenol or Ibuprofen when I feel like I need the "edge" taken off the pain. Most of the time it doesn't work or the relief is so slight I don't really feel it.
I love you and I'm for YOU.
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Re: does anyone have an addiction to pain meds?
Tue, September 4, 2007 - 5:28 PMYeah, I hear you, Leah.. the tylenol is just to keep me from going into icy cold pain sweats. Just takes the edge off, but barely. Since I have so much aversion to alcohol and now even the taste, I'm not so sure I could handle taking even one sip, without going into a flashback of the "olde drinking days" and they weren't so pretty either.
But when I was taking the pain meds, I didn't drive or even go out, I was so afraid of toppling over.:)) and as you know, I topple over even when sober.
So, for me to stay on top of things, and to write and drive and just do normal day to day things, I bite the bullet and just try not to think about it too much. And if it gets too bad, in the evning, I might take a tylenol...
this summer has been a drag in that area, I had a lot of pain. But by just ignoring it, I only felt it in the evening, during the night, and up until my first cuppa joe.
I love coffee, it really does help me. And most of the time, I'm in a pretty good mood mentally, so the physical part doesn't get me down too much.
Can I hear more from you folks? -
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Re: does anyone have an addiction to pain meds?
Tue, September 4, 2007 - 9:06 PMLucy, I love my coffee too and I found that if I take my Tylenol or ibuprofen while I'm enjoying my cuppa lovingly ground whole bean java goodness brewed in a french press, it helps the pain meds work a little better. It must be the conept that Excedrin has been using in their pain formula for years. Theirs has caffeine in it. So I just take my meds and enjoy my caffeine on the side. Try taking yours with coffee and maybe the meds will work better for you. And no, the effect isn't the same if you drink cola with the meds; at least not for me anyway.
I love you!
Leah
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