There are probably as many answers to this as there are people doing it. I can't answer for anyone else, especially for the men who specifically enjoy watching or knowing that their woman is fucking other men, to the exclusion of the men fucking other women. My lady and I go both ways on that part, and I know that some men here have no interest in fucking other women.

That said, I derive much of my pleasure from my lady's pleasure. If it makes her happy having other men, so be it. We only swing together, so when she is enjoying another man, I'm right there enjoying the experience with her. And when I enjoy another woman, she's right there, too, and participating in the act as well. We just really enjoy doing these things together, and believe it can strengthen an already strong relationship.

Next weekend, we are making our first trip to a large swinger's club together. I have been there before, with an ex, but my lady hasn't ever done anything like this. So it should be a real eye-opener for her. I'll report in next week.

Its sort of like facing your worst fear.

Personally I think A woman can not do anything of this nature just because her man wants to.. Women are strong-willed in so many ways. I feel a man cannot convince or persuade a woman to do anything she doesn't want to do outright or subconsciously. I feel certain people are just wired a certain way and the more they try to fight it the more miserable or not at peace they are.. I discovered a while back that I am a voyeur. One of the biggest turn-ons about watching my lady with another is that we are doing it together. She loves me and trust me enough to know that I will think no less of her because of her desire and vice-versa. We are partners sharing a common secret.

I feel honored to put her on queen status, and make her the center of attention. To be stimulated in ways that one-on-one love making cannot create. To see the smile on her face that she is pleased about the individual I picked for her. To watch her not hold back and loose herself in lust, trying and doing anything that comes to her lovely mind. To love her for who she is and not what others wanted or expected her to be.

I can't explain why I'm like this but I am who I am. My ultimate desire is to have someone who understands me and I can feed her need as well as her feeding mine with no regrets. I'm not the type that likes to hear about it after it happens, I like to be there to protect my lady and be there when her company is gone.. Anything we do together is wonderful.. All she has to do is tell me she's in the mood and I will get to work to make it happen..

Everone is different so I guess you have to communicate with your man and take him at his word until he show's you different. Good luck on your quest for the answers you seek.

Whenever I've shared a partner with another - either a man or a woman, it's because I enjoy seeing my partner experiencing her pleasure. Usually I'm right there with her - either as a second partner or as someone supporting her (holding her & kissing her throughout the experience) ... or I'm enjoying another partner while she's enjoying that person's partner.

Part of it is just knowing that it's with my permission & support that she is allowed to experience these things - and she'll feel safe while doing so. There's no judgement in letting her indulge in the full spectrum of her sexual pleasures ... and I love the way she turns on other people ... the way others want her and look upon with lust gives me a thrill - because I know when all is said and done - she's mine.

I have to admit I find watching my wife being satisfied by another man a great turn on and to be truthful she gets just as turned on by excitement. We started off by swinging but I wasn't totally happy with the partners I had and my wife wasn't exactly over the moon about a few of hers. One day we met a single guy at a swingers party, he was asked to leave for whatever reason (I think some of the guys were jealous) we left the same time one thing led to another and he joined us in our bed. After that experience we were hooked and threesomes were the norm, my wife gets satisfied (looks for well hung single guys) and I am happy as well. It might not be for everybody but we enjoy it ;)

So someone asks you; how can you let guys fuck your wife? You know from the start what you’ve got. She loves to fuck and she loves to be fucked by many men. From day one that was the case. She’s a special woman, one you dream of having but few can have. You know of every man that will fill your wife. That’s what you have total honesty. The love you share is special, foreign to most. You want to see the other pleasured. You don’t own a race horse and keep it in a barn. So too is the insatiable woman who craves cock by the dozens. She’s the girl that was the highlight of the frat party in college. She loves the feeling of being airtight. Hundreds of cocks have found their way inside her. Your friends love her and you love to watch them fuck her. It feels great to have your cock in pussy that is filled with the cum of other men. There's the taste of other men when you go down on her. She loves to put on a show. She is confident. She knows you are there for her. Nothing better than this special kind of girl......But she wants you to enjoy every woman you want too. She asks you how so and so felt. It’s all about pleasure, yours and hers. She’s hot…….She’s mine.

Hi Marie!

I'll chime in with my two cents. I am relatively new to swinging, only having partaken in the last nine months or so. Having been in the position of having a cheating ex-partner I never would have imagined that I would end up swinging, but it has actually strenghthened an already strong bond between myself and my absolutely wonderful gentleman.

My love and I were discussing fantasies and it came out that one of my longest lived fantasies was to be with two men. After plenty of completely frank and open talks we decided to try a threesome when we found the right man to join us. My honey has had previous swinging experience so he was comfortable with the idea of sharing me with another. Together we created a profile on adult friend finder and weeded through the responses. Its time consuming, but not really difficult to weed the chaff from the grain. We ended up with a couple of prospects and arranged to meet in a casual place for dinner. With our first prospect we hit gold. The chemistry was there and the three of genuinely enjoyed each other's company, both in a casual setting, and as we later found, very much so in a sexual setting. We have become good friends with this delight of a man and still see him as often as our schedules can mesh. For me it was a chance to explore fantasies and be completely and utterly awash in pleasure. The fact that my honey would give me such a rare and special gift has never slipped my mind, and is something I treasure. We definitely ended up even closer than we had been and I wanted very much to give him the same gift he gave me by finding the right woman to join us. When that became a reality it was just as much a delight as my experience and I genuinely enjoyed watching the two of them together, not to mention the fun of sharing him with her and treating him to such delights as two way blow jobs.

Neither of our current playmates is a third in the relationship Les and I share, rather they are friends with whom we choose to share a much more intimate part of ourselves--friends and playmates. There is never any question at all about the primary relationship being Les and I. If anyone ever gets in the way of that then they are summarily given the boot. That is one of the ground rules we laid out together long before we ever wrote that first swinger's profile. Our other rules include that we only swing together and either of us has total veto power at any time. If one of us is uncomfortable for has any reservations about any person, act, setting etc, then it either doesn't happen in the first place or stops immediately with no questions asked. Without ground rules I know I never would have felt safe exploring this part of my (and our) sexuality, but with them in place there are no second guesses--every activity is always 100% above board and I can have complete trust in my sweetheart. That in and of itself brings us closer together!