This one is too funny!!!!!!

1. Recently, when I went to McDonald's I saw on the menu that you could
have an order of 6, 9 or 12 Chicken McNuggets. I asked for a half dozen
nuggets. "We don't have half dozen nuggets," said the teenager at the
counter. "You don't?" I replied. "We only have six, nine, or twelve," was
the reply. "So I can't order a half dozen nuggets, but I can order six?"
"That's right." So I shook my head and ordered six McNuggets.

2. I was checking out at the local Wal-Mart with just a few items and the
lady behind me put her things on the belt close to mine. I picked up one of
those "dividers" that they keep by the cash register and placed it between
our things so they wouldn't get mixed. After the girl had scanned all of my
items, she picked up the "divider",looking it all over for the bar code so
she c! ould scan it. Not finding the bar code she said to me,
"Do you know how much this is?" I said to her "I've changed my mind, I
don't think I'll buy that today." She said "OK," and I paid her for the
things and left. She had no clue to what had just happened.

3. A lady at work was seen putting a credit card into her floppy drive and
pulling it out very quickly. When I inquired as to what she was doing, she
said she was shopping on the Internet and they kept asking for a credit
card number, so she was using the ATM "thingy."


4. I recently saw a distraught young lady weeping beside her car. "Do you
need some help?" I asked. She replied, "I knew I should have replaced the
battery to this remote door unlocker. Now I can't get into my car. Do you
think they (pointing to a distant convenience store) would have a battery to
fit this?" "Hmmm, I dunno. Do you have an alarm, too?" I asked. "No, just
this remote thingy," sh! e answered, handing it and the car keys to me. As I
took the key a nd manually unlocked the door, I replied, "Why don't you drive
over there and check about the batteries. It's a long walk."

5. Several years ago, we had an Intern who was none too swift. One day she
was typing and turned to a secretary and said, "I'm almost out of typing
paper. What do I do?" "Just use copier machine paper," the secretary told
her. With that, the intern took her last remaining blank piece of paper,
put it on the photocopier and proceeded to make five "blank" copies.

6. A mother calls 911 very worried asking the dispatcher if she needs to
take her kid to the emergency room, the kid was eating ants. The dispatcher
tells her to give the kid some Benadryl and he should be fine, the mother
says, I just gave him some ant killer.....
Dispatcher: Rush him in to emergency!


Life is tough. It's tougher if you're especially challenged.
  • Re: How do These People Survive?

    Tue, May 13, 2008 - 6:52 PM
    uh.. umm.. hmm..

    it usually takes a lot to make me speechless. i just think it's a shame that the last lady already had the chance to breed. I mean, obviously, her child already has the " dumbass " gene..
    • Re: How do These People Survive?

      Thu, May 15, 2008 - 6:36 AM
      I've got one --- My daughter in law recently went through a Mcdonald's drive thru with 2 of my grandchildren, and ordered "Two cheeseburger happy meals" --- the Mcdonald's employee (lucky to be alive today - and if you knew my daughter inlaw you'd know what I mean) replied "We don't have 2 cheeseburger happy meals".
      Karen asked "What do you mean you don't HAVE 2 cheeseburger happy meals??", to which the clerk replied "They only come with one in each".
      So Karen said "I know -- so I want ONE happy meal with a cheeseburger, okay?, then I want ANOTHER happy meal with a cheeseburger..." -- so far, so good.....
      Then, just to make sure the clerk had it right, Karen said "Okay, so you should have TWO cheesburger happy meals...."
      And watched the screen as the clerk removed the two happy meals and explained again "We don't HAVE two cheeseburger happy meals"
      !!!?????

      Somehow, she ended up with the right order, and everyone lived.
      • Re: How do These People Survive?

        Thu, May 15, 2008 - 7:52 AM
        Ugh, people these days are so dumb!
        • Re: How do These People Survive?

          Thu, May 15, 2008 - 10:48 AM
          These stories are some of the best ever - I wonder, are they really true? I'd love for them to be really, totally true. There are so many people I see every day around here and I'm like, how did you get to be in your '30s without being hit by a car crossing the street?

          I have the hardest time getting a packet of ketchup with any drive-thru order at McD's -- it's not on their list and there's no key on the register for it and they just go into meltdown. When you pick up your order the kid dissappears instantly, so I tried to say it into the speaker when I order but that was even worse. Then when you do get someone they give you a whole handful when you only want one.
          • Re: How do These People Survive?

            Thu, May 15, 2008 - 10:54 AM
            I have had that experience too. You ask for a ketchup packet and you get two handfuls. HA! But if you ask for extra napkins, you get 1!
            Funny story, my sister worked at McD's and she brought home a bag of ketchup packets. She told me that I needed to fill the ketchup bottle at home with them. I was 8 or 9, so I believed her. It took hours and I couldn't eat ketchup for weeks it grossed me out so much. Ah memories...

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