Qualities of a Good Dom

topic posted Wed, January 4, 2006 - 6:30 PM by  klg
What are some of the qualities of a good dom? How do you recognize one when you see one?

One of the most important characteristics is the dominant must be someone who is first and foremost in control of himself. If he can't control his own self, how can he be expected to control you?

Some other important characteristics include compassion, excellent communications skills, courtesy, self-acceptance as well as acceptance of the submissive, grace, honesty, humility, intelligence, loyalty, patience, pride, respect for himself and others, responsibility, service, and above all, dominance - the natural ability to lead and exert control in a respectful and intelligent manner.

Dominance is not the same thing as being domineering. A "true" dominant is more likely to be humble than boastful. He has solid self-confidence, and nothing to prove to others. He knows who he is, so the opinions of others don't matter to his self-definition. He will take your limits into account when deciding what to order you to do, and he knows and respects his *own* limits, and doesn't try to bite off more than he can chew, or attempt activities that he has not been trained in.

Some good websites with further definitions and discussion include, in no particular order:

Characteristics of a Successful Dominant:

10 Qualities That Make a Good Mistress -

How to Spot a Dominant at Ten Paces -

On Cyber and Getting to Know a New Dominant or Submissive -

and a caveat about what a good dominant is *not* can be found at The Closed Minded Dominant Syndrome -

posted by:
offline klg

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