Hey all. This tribe has been a great place for me to work through my "issues" (if you will) ;-). I wanted to relate an interesting story. Closure is great and I wish each and everyone of you get it. I can't tell you how, as it is individual.

Earlier this week, I got an email from my ex BF. I was shocked to see it in my inbox. It took me about 1/2 hour to even get up the nerve to open it. When I did, it was a complaint about the posts I'd made to this tribe. ;-) His issues were... I'd used his first name and mentioned something that I had no idea was so personal and not "public" knowledge. He accused me of trying to hurt him. He also accused me of having pictures of his kids on Tribe

Initially I was really angry. There is no connection of me to him anywhere on my profiles sets (MySpace, Tribe, Yahoo, Facebook, Eons......) Ok..so I'm social!

So.... I worked up the nerve to go see him that very day. I went by his house and realized (no work truck @ 7 pm @ night and its a Tues) AHHH there's someone new and it's Tuesday "spend the night at the GF's house" night. Ok, so now I get it.

I went to see him the next day. IT WAS SO SCARY FOR ME TO DO THIS. TO FACE HIM AFTER 6 MONTHS. IN MY MIND HE LOOMED SO LARGE. I started out being angry, but all in all, I got to tell him how hard the break had been. He said "we had a relationship and then it ended". He said "I treated you well". Yes he did.... until the end. The end was horrible and I tried to convey that He really needed to have talked to me to my face. I tried to convey how very, very difficult it had been It was more horrible than my divorce. I don't know if he'll ever truly take that in and acknowledge that.

He clearly didn't get that. He is convinced that his method is "gentle". I base that on what he said and his body language.

The other thing that happened is that when I said there is no way anyone could connect him to me online from any of my profiles. He lied about how the connection was made. The lie was such that I felt bad and offered to make restitution. But I didn't know it was a lie at the time.

Anyway, long story short. I got my say. He got to hear me. I shook his hand and wished him well and drove off into the sunset (literally). It was a WONDERFUL, WONDERFUL, WONDERFUL feeling. I GOT CLOSURE.

Now, when I got home I had an email from a mutual friend that uncovered the lie and I was SO angry, but then I realized.... He has a new person in his life and he doesn't want her to know anything about me (and possibly his inability to close the relationship well). OF COURSE I CAN ONLY GUESS. But I sent him an email saying I detest liars, that I knew he had someone new and absolutely nothing to fear from me and that what he needed to worry about is that I no longer had a good opinion of him and his character.

But I was freed. FREE. And I have to tell you. What's left is some very beautiful memories. Because even though the entire relationship was doomed because only he knew he couldnt commit: IT WAS SO GREAT THE WHOLE TIME. So I am left with having had a great relationship that in hindsight was doomed. But its ok!

I only hope you all get closure.