what on earth do you do when you feel a huge attraction for a taken man?
We get on well when we meet, thankfully we don't work together don't think i could cope with that?
We get on well when we meet, thankfully we don't work together don't think i could cope with that?
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London
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Re: crush with a married man
Wed, April 12, 2006 - 11:06 PMthats a tough one. i'm kind of in the opposite position. i'm married and this single (hot) co-worker is very interested in me. i feel quite the attraction towards him as well (which makes the situation worse). -
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Unsu...
Re: crush with a married man
Thu, April 13, 2006 - 4:35 AMThank you! I have come home. I have been on tribe for about a month or more, searching for a place to express my inner issue. A married man. I also am married, so Sabrina I can relate girl.
The open relationship idea with my husband wasnt in place when we got married, but I have always been honost with my husband(lets give these guys some names rather than husband and affair) but when I told Keith about Scott, he was pretty understanding. ( we are all just human afterall). The problem came when Scott and I fell in love with each other.
I would love to share more of this and also to learn more about each of your stories.
This is a intense place in my life right now and expression and feed back are desperitly needed. Im sure you understand yes? -
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Re: crush with a married man
Thu, April 13, 2006 - 12:03 PMHi thanks for replying
It is so frustrating at times, i like him so much, yet i wasn't looking when i found him. Shame someone found him first.
He does flirt with me, i did flirt with him.
But i've been careful since i found out he was married, don't want to go down the affair route.
But one thing that bugs me, is that they say its ok for a married person to flirt with someone who isn't their spouse, no arguements there but for a single person to flirt with a married one is not so. A bit of double-standards, or have i missed something along the way.
I'd like to continue to flirt with him, it is fun but i'm worried how others would see me. -
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Unsu...
Re: crush with a married man
Tue, April 18, 2006 - 8:34 AMFlirting is never wrong. Its a form of communication, a way of expressing our feelings about someoone or something that has grabbed our attention. I also was not looking when I found mine. I believe people show up in our lives for a reason. Lessons of life come to us in things that appeal to us, other wise we would pay them no attention. I myself have learned to never pass by a click. I say go with your gut, if it feels right it is right. Your soul is never wrong in drawing to it what it needs for growth. Just keep your eyes open to the REASON hes here. And always STAY TRUE TO YOU. -
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Re: crush with a married man
Tue, April 18, 2006 - 9:21 AMthank you, kala... i really needed to hear that! your words mean alot to me...
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Re: crush with a married man
Tue, April 18, 2006 - 12:28 PMKala.
Have to agree with elle great choice of words thank you.
Now as to why he entered my life.
Mmmmmmm.
Guess i'll find out one day. -
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Re: crush with a married man
Thu, April 20, 2006 - 8:15 AMi too needed to hear such kind words. i have been going insane though. i decided to end this fling i was having. i realized that i couldn't handle the feelings that were emerging for me and knowing that to him this really was friends w/ benefits. i wish i could figure out why he entered my life though? what in the world can i learn from this, that is positive? i feel like some kid in high school with a crush... i actually felt brave yesterday and kind of told him how i felt. yeah- likely the stupidest thing i will do for a while. i got some line about how he's done this before and totally understands cause the last girl ended up feeling the way i do. i really wanted to die about that time. i'm not sure i want to explore exactly how that made me feel.... lets see, really stupid or what? i think for now i will take the words of previous posts and try to find some positive reason as to why he entered my life, and remember the fun we did have :) -
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Unsu...
Re: crush with a married man
Fri, April 21, 2006 - 7:02 AMSabrina
I wasnt going to reply cause I dont like to be to over baring with my thoughts on things and I already have posted twice, but I just wanted to say that I think remembering the fun you had is an excellent idea! I also hope that eventually you will be able to go into your pain of this situation and sift through it for understanding of why you feel what you do. I am a true believer that the dark unpleasent places of our soul hold much value, and once you get the courage up to go in, you'll find its not so scary after all. Its all part of who we are and cutting out painful areas cuts us off from part of ourself.
Please do not call yourself or your actions stupid. There is nothing stupid about you or any of us. Every decision you made was the right decision for you, at that time in your life. We live moment by moment and grow as we go. Maybe his response was not what was hoped for, but it does not make you any less valuable, smart, beautiful or undeserving.
Examine your intentions
Examine your actions
Examine the results
Examine your feelings
Life is about ' Experiencing' - everything we can! And applying it to the next round.
'We live and we learn' - ' We grow as we go ' -
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Re: crush with a married man
Sat, December 23, 2006 - 12:22 PMthere's a homewrecker tribe.
just kidding. i have to keep that reigned in myself. -
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This is the maximum depth. Additional responses will not be threaded.
Re: crush with a married man
Mon, December 10, 2007 - 11:12 AMWARNING! If you are married you took a vow, made a promise, stood in front of family and friends and maybe in front of your god. Your partner may believe in this promise to some degree or another and so should you. An affair even if it begans with good intentions and is based on love, it will not remain that way. If your partner is unaware and trusting in your fidility your affair will soon disintergrate in to a relationship based on sex. You won't have a relationship with your lover you will be fucking them. You will get together and fuck like a whore on a time clock and a sailor on leave. You won't have time together to share much, you wil have to lie and coverup and worry. If what you are thinking of would not feel good if it happened to you don't do it to another, espically your spouse. If you think your spouse has cheated on you don't get even. Have a heart to heart, get help or a divorce, but don't get even. What if you are wrong, what if your spouse didn't cheat, appearences can be deceving, what if you are wrong?
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