Okay so I'm not so much into labels and all. But if a woman likes to kiss and make-out
with other women but doesn't necessarily want to participate fully in sexuality with a woman
is she bisexual? I'm just wondering....
with other women but doesn't necessarily want to participate fully in sexuality with a woman
is she bisexual? I'm just wondering....
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Re: Question......
Sat, April 26, 2008 - 6:43 PMi think everyone is in the grey scale of sexuality..no one is 100% hetero or 100% homo
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Re: Question......
Sat, April 26, 2008 - 7:44 PMI'm not into labels..but if I was to label it...I'd label it as passionate freedom of expression
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As a bisexual...
Sat, April 26, 2008 - 7:57 PM...I generally feel a little irked by women who feel sexual attraction toward both men and women yet distance themselves from the bisexual identity.
The fact of the matter is though, sexuality is so dynamic, there are not enough labels to cover each person's personal attachment to sensual/sexual/intimate/physical attraction...or identity.
It's tough to try to step outside the various boxes we have established and attempt to be open about it to others. People tend to want to push one into a box they are already familiar with.
I'm glad you are self-aware enough to discern between what you actually want and what people require in order to label you.
Go on with your bad self. :)
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Re: Question......
Sat, April 26, 2008 - 9:16 PMvi: is she bisexual?
Basically you are bisexual if you want to be. There is no real standard for such things other than self identification and finding both sexes sexually stimulating.
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"Basically you are bisexual if you want to be"
Sat, April 26, 2008 - 10:03 PMThere are some who would say otherwise, There are some people who are attracted to both sexes by nature, not by choice. Attraction and choice/ choice of action can be separate issues. -
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Re: "Basically you are bisexual if you want to be"
Sat, April 26, 2008 - 10:25 PMThe relevant factor is not "why," its just that you are or not. And some people would claim that is the only factor, but I don't agree. Bisexual, or any of that, is really as much a socio-political statement as it is one of sexual preference so I feel if some one doesn't self identify as such, they aren't.
Just like I wouldn't say some one was xtian if they said they weren't even if I found they went to a xtian church from time to time.
She could easily just be interested in the intimacy and not the sexuality. Just like metro-sexuals are interested in aspects of the lifestyle but not the sexuality. Sure it messes up the clean cut designations, but people are like that.
The key point is that it doesn't matter so much what you call yourself. What matters is knowing yourself and developing good relationships with the people you care about, no matter what sex they happen to be, whether or not you jump their bones.
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Re: Question......
Sat, April 26, 2008 - 10:31 PMWell it *is* just a label. In my mind, sexuality is fluid...in my lifetime I have gone the gammut from being more physically attracted to men to more physically attracted to women to being rather equally attracted to both and on and on. It's not because I'm "on the fence" or that I'm "questioning" - I'm not - it's simply that I finally accepted the fact that I'm sexually fluid (as are many people).
There are no neat little boxes for sexuality. You could say you are bi-sensual rather than bi-sexual since sex doesn't play into the picture for you (at this time in your life and maybe never will). But the fact remains - it's just a label, after all. We humans are just too comples for labels...and as Swarm D pointed out - regardless of what we are inclined toward naturally, we choose our labels.
So - *you* get to decide what label you want (if you want one) - no one else can choose that for you.
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Re: Question......
Sun, April 27, 2008 - 10:19 AMI like that phrase "bi-sensual". Yet labels are just shorthand for something far more complex than a lot of our languaging makes room for.
Most human beings need some kind of intimacy, some feeling of connection. We are social animals and those needs are satisfied in a million different ways.
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Re: Question......
Sat, April 26, 2008 - 10:42 PMSounds like you're pro-affection but not necessarily into crazy intimate sex with women. When someone asks me if that is "bi" it means that either they or someone(s) they know are trying to imply that you "go both ways"...whether you do or not should really be up to you. That having been said, some folks assume that when you say something like "I only like to kiss women...but I'm straight" that you are "playing the field" while laying down a "get away from potential relationship free card". However, if you are upfront with them about "kissing only" then, well, I guess it's on them...and yourself...to handle your interactions maturely and respectfully. Sounds easy, right?
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Re: Question......
Sun, April 27, 2008 - 12:59 PMSome very good points made.
To me the key seems that labels come with expectations,
and fluid sexuality seems to defy labeling.
I do really like the term bisensual though.
That's a keeper....
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Re: Question......
Wed, May 7, 2008 - 11:14 AMIf you have to label things, then it is a bi-sexual act.
I think that labels have too many negative connotations, but that's life on this wonderful planet.
Betcha -
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Re: Question......
Tue, May 13, 2008 - 4:00 PMIntimate affection with someone does not have to be sexual at all. People will make assumptions. How you or they handle the situation is not always predictable. However, if you label yourself or others as bisexual simply because you or they like to kiss either sex on the lips? Woah. Weird. Human beings in various cultures hold hands, kiss, etc and it has nothing to do with sex...although it may have something to do with demonstrating social and intimate closeness...seperately from any sexual urge or inclination. -
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Re: Question......
Tue, May 13, 2008 - 10:35 PMThere are men on this planet that kiss each other on each cheek as a greeting, and yet are considered extremely masculine. That this is the ultimate form of respect. See women do that but not want to eat each other out or strap one on and go at it, we are automatically bisexual, and if we don't claim that label for doing so we are either in denial or hiding something. I hate double standards!!!
Lynn
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