just hide your money.,and grow a mustache~~;0))~~

You used the word "attracted".

Do you truely find them attractive? What element of them draws you in initially? What do they have in common?

As a kid, and then even post-college, I wondered why "all the pretty girls go for the douchebags that treat them like crap?"

Then later I realized a few things:
(1) "pretty" goes way deeper than the skin (and nose job ;-)
(2) some people accept, or even welcome, strongly-inflicted negative attention; the intensity makes them somehow feel secure
(3) nice guys might finish last, but ultimately, we're the ones people really wish to be with as they struggle to leave their miserable relationships

Maybe it's harder to find "nice guys" because they're "working hard" to stay in loving relationships, and trying to stay the course while they're figuring out how the hell to do so!

You're a bit vague when you write "problems around relationships and/or money".... lack of $$$ is always stressful. Or perhaps you mean that you think their views about responsibility and deep meaningful love are crappy?

Well, I don't know about the money part...but I might have some insight on the relationships part. That is...if the relationship problem is that the guy is an asshole.

If that's the case...try this on for size...my own theory on why so many women and men seem to be attracted to assholes....

Assholes, at least many of them, seem to have three or more of the following positive personality traits going for them:
1) don't give a fuck what others think of them
2) self confident
3) kind of cocky
4) generally physically attractive - if they weren't, people would NOT put up with their shit
5) decisive
6) job/economic climbers - what percentage of executives and managers are assholes? does it seem to you like a higher percentage than the general population? sure does to me! why? possibly cause these folks will step on anyone in their way to climb that ladder

Now...all that stuff is pretty attractive to women. And I don't blame you.... I find those things attractive in women too.

Unfortunately, in an asshole, it comes connected to the other shit he/she brings. You know...making nasty comments, always being right in every argument, never allowing you to have it your way, belittling you, maybe even hitting you. Who knows. S/He's an asshole. That's the kind of shit assholes pull.

If that's the case, learn to separate the guys who have those personality traits above, but are not assholes from the ones who ARE assholes. It can be tricky, I know, but you can actually suss it out if you ask the right questions and listen to his answers.

Good good. They got something important to teach you, and you are realizing that. Good. You use the I Ching? I like it a lot and it works for me. Anyway, work with that, the assumption that they are your gurus in this and that is why you are drawn to them. Fearlessly ask yourcellf why.

Women I have met who are attracted losers I have always felt was due to a lack of self-esteem. These may be bright successful intelligent women who don't think they are worthy of a decent guy. My wife's good friend seems to be like this. I don't know if this applies to you, just an observation in general. Maybe you're just perceptive about guys who have major flaws and are drawn to them. Hope you figure it out and find someone whom you can be happy with.

Is it really a mater of their problem with relationships and or money. Or your being attracted to them , and their view of relationships / money doesn't conform to your wishes ? hence the need to " fix them".
You're asking us, " do I have the problem, or do they" ? Generally speaking, if you think everyone else has a problem, then it's probably you that has a problem.
But in the final Analise your asking others to respond to a complex situation with only the most meager information. Ultimately, only you can answer this, and take the steps to correct yourself, you can not " fix" another, only yourself.

Miss..there is a lot of reasons behind attractions

We are attracted to things we are familiar with, even if they are unhealthy.

We are often attracted to qualities in people that remind us of our first significant relationships..i.e parents, peers, teachers

We are also attracted to people who behave in ways we don't allow ourselves to behave...they represent the dark shadows we dislike to express...so through them we get the opportunity to express our darkness

Now, we also play roles that give us a sense of comfort and proves us with some identity...many folks like to rescue because it makes them feel worthy of someone's love and unconsciously gives them a position that makes them valueable to the relationship.

Good men/women who have low self-esteems often connect with assholes many times cause they learned when they were young that in order to get love they need to "earn" that right.

Of course many of the unhealthy roles we learn come from imbalanced homes where our parents and siblings and/or peers taught us that in order to earn their love, we had to fulfill different conditions, like behave accordingly, do as you are told, be a perfect little kid...etc

Our "fix it" tendencies are our way of repairing those past relationship we faced in our chidlhood or while growing up and often repeat when we "don't learn" new ways of being in relationships

Miss...as yourself if you didn't fix a guy, will you still be of value? If you didn't help, will you be able to enjoy yourself in the relationship completely?

What would happen if you meet a guy who had it all? Would you feel equal? sufficient or enough to be with them?

Do you think you play the hero more then you need to?

Miss Pixie, I see a lot 'loser' calling here upon initial reading, and funny, my first thought was, maybe there is an independent or unconventional component that you find compelling. How that plays out in your life may not go well, but how about looking at thebehaviors and personality traits that you like and see if you can find someone with those, yet he still has a viable way to fund his life and make good relationship choices?