I've been in a relationship with my boyfriend for 4 years now and we have no major problems. Our problems are small in comparison to other relationships but always the same, he gets mad at me about something little or wants me to "change" something small, i get defensive and we become rivals until we work the situation out. Then we're back to normal...I'm taurus sun, scorpio rising, aquarius moon. He's capricorn sun, taurus rising, capricorn moon. As you can see we technically are very compatible and have the same interests, goals, etc. but our moons are constantly butting heads. I also often tell myself that if we were to break up I hope he would feel the burn of not having me in his life. He knows this and said i was selfish for that. I know this is typical scorpio rising. Anyone else feel the same way? I love him so much but that capricorn "know it all" attitude bugs the hell out of me!
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Re: Scorpio Rising in Love - Do you have these same problems?
Tue, August 5, 2008 - 10:44 AMWell, the fact is, he WOULD feel your loss more. People just don't like to hear that the loss of themselves won't be as detrimental to their mate as it would vice versa. You shouldn't honestly say things like that. You say it to hurt him, and all that does is damage your relationship further.
He's anal retentive. Somewhat perfectionistic and not all that keen on screwing up and dilly-dallying. You're probably not any of these things. Either embrace each other as you are, or you just embrace him for who he is and not let these little comments get to you. I suspect you may be ultra-sensitive, so it may be hard to do...but there just comes a point when you have to man up about the details.
I don't think it's your moons that are in this, i think it's your risings. Judging by your reactions and his nitpicking (though of course, his moon's the same), that's all it is. I don't like to look at profiles, because I feel they'll sway my answer...but you both sound very young. The way either of you see these 'details' that get in the way...that will change over the years.
Aquarius doesn't take very minor insults badly...they barely notice them, from my experience.
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Re: Scorpio Rising in Love - Do you have these same problems?
Tue, August 5, 2008 - 12:44 PMYour post made me laugh. I remember long ago my soul mate made me go with him to see a marriage counselor who didn't have much of any worth to say but did say this, "You need to operate as a team instead of as competitors." That did change us and we did start operating more as a team than competitors. I have to admit, the competitor was me. I had big problems with the concept of marriage, especially in the socially defined way, and I didn't take to it well at all. I finally realized my problem wasn't with him (we'd never had problems), it was with the whole social construct of marriage. My Scorpio didn't like it and wouldn't accept anything regarding it and I could be quite the competitor over it.
On the other hand, no I didn't want him to suffer if we broke up. I don't seem to have that Scorpio thing of wanting them to suffer. I'm still friends with all my ex's except one and that relationship was just toxic to us both. However I didn't even with that one bad, I just wanted out of that toxic mess and felt he should want the same thing. With all of them I want the best of everything, especially my soul mate. He would have to do something very bad to make me feel like that about him.
It seems like that feeling would have to stem from the Scorpio Rising feeling as if they were rejected or betrayed. I can't really identify with the whole rejection thing, but if I was betrayed it would be bad. -
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Re: Scorpio Rising in Love - Do you have these same problems?
Tue, August 5, 2008 - 12:59 PMZanne, this has really made me see my marriage from a different angle. I am scorp. rising aries sun and taurus moon. My partner is
Libra sun, leo rising and cap. moon. I feel that a lot of our arguments seem to stem from control or a need to. He also nitpicks and
criticises and I take it all so personally. We are both mega stubborn but work really well when we are both on the same side. I just
feel like I have to be the one that compromises though. Mentally we click really well. What you say about the marriage and scorpio thing
though makes sense - I resent that I have given myself totally to this relationship - I don't know why. Half of me wants to do my own thing,
live on my own with my daughter and do what I WANT. The other half would be really heartbroken. Funny, in my previous marriage I was so
emotionally detached and I look back and didn't argue at all. Is it all worth it? LOVE and all that. -
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Re: Scorpio Rising in Love - Do you have these same problems?
Tue, August 5, 2008 - 4:09 PMZoe, I lived with my soul mate a year before we married and didn't care about any of it at all. He's so OCD he's over the top but since I don't want to deal with anything domestic it's okay. He can have all his rules if he does it and I won't upset the order. That was the way we were from the get go. Honestly, no one else could even stand to live with either one of us and we know it. What I couldn't stand was the rest of the world constantly throwing their two cents in about how we were supposed to live, especially me because we were "married." And of course if he didn't immediately tell them to shut up and get the hell away from me, then it was bad news. And at first he took care of me while I was writing but the incessant litany of the outside morons (who overwhelmingly were female no less) finally drove me to go to work and start competing with him in every way. It was ridiculous. So we resolved the whole thing by cutting out everyone who couldn't keep their mouth shut and mind their own business. That's something we still do. There's me, him and us. If someone crosses the line with either of those three, they are out. I don't quite think the marriage counselor had that in mind (since even she had her stupid opinion about women and how they should act which earned her instantly being terminated) but so what? It worked for us.
I can't say we nitpick or criticize. He fusses but that's his OCD. If he's chasing me out the door wanting to iron my skirt because it came from the cleaners with a wrinkle in it, I don't take it personally. It's his OCD talking. If I laugh at some of his OCD stuff, he doesn't take that personally either. Now if someone else laughed at him or fussed at me? Game on.
He's Aquarian sun, Taurus Moon and Pisces Rising. I'm Libra/Scorpio Cusp, Scorpio Rising and Taurus Moon. I'm convinced that what makes us work is our Neptune aspects. In synastry readings it always said we idealize each other, feel fated and don't think we can live without each other. That pretty much sums it up. In other words, we are perfectly happy in our dysfunction.
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Re: Scorpio Rising in Love - Do you have these same problems?
Tue, August 5, 2008 - 1:14 PMHI TAM, I am scorpio rising, aries sun taurus moon,
My husband is cap. moon and I've read a lot about it. They need to feel in control most of the time. Emotionally
they didn't have much time to develop as children and apparently they could have had excessive mothering in some
way. Also, I looked up a spiritual astr. book and in past lives they are used to taking charge and being in control - money,
business and all that. Sorry but adolf hitler was moon cap. Not that your guy is at all that. In any case hitler was scorpio
rising l.o.l. Perhaps you may take stuff personally = I am exactly the same. I don't like hurting people intentionally and
always think of the other persons feelings, and when I'm critisized I lash out verbally. Sometimes really badly.
Stay cool!
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Re: Scorpio Rising in Love - Do you have these same problems?
Tue, August 5, 2008 - 4:16 PMZoe, this made me laugh. My other soul mate (yes, I've had two but only one I can be with now) has a Cap moon to my Taurus moon and we get along great. Probably because he took control and mothered me from the start right down to taking me out to lunch and ordering for me without asking what I wanted. I LOVED that! My other one did that too (Taurus Moon so he mothers me too). I can't stand deciding what to eat. He also set up my whole desk, found me a place to live and moved me in. Hmmm Guess it's not our moons clicking although I always thought it was. Now he never does that with things I care about because he doesn't want my Scorpion tail to sting him. Somehow he knows what I care about and he stays away from that. (And he does have major mother issues with his own mom. Had to take care of her and grow up before his time.)
I'd also believe the past life part. Sounds right on the money to me. -
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Re: Scorpio Rising in Love - Do you have these same problems?
Wed, August 6, 2008 - 9:53 PMin response to the wanting your ex to suffer... i dont think that it is that we scorpio risers want them to suffer necessarily..
i may just be speaking for myself. but i don't want them to suffer... i just don't want them to be able to bear my absence.. i want them only to suffer out of love and need for me.. it is almost offensive if they do not suffer, at least for a while..suffering forever... well.. that might be overdoing it.. however .. it is ok. for them to long for me forever,
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Re: Scorpio Rising in Love - Do you have these same problems?
Tue, August 5, 2008 - 2:58 PMhmmm aquarius moons need more space, but don't you think that maybe what's more at play here is your possessive taurus sun?
Maybe the problem is to do with the fact that you have sun/moon and ascendant in fixed signs which can be very possessive and stubborn
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Re: Scorpio Rising in Love - Do you have these same problems?
Thu, September 25, 2008 - 4:23 PMEveryone is right!
RE: 1st post, I am very young (I think) 24 he is 25 and we've been dating since 19/21...I dont want him to suffer literally but if we were to break up I would definitely want him to feel my absence in his life...It would be hard for me to be his friend, at least for a long while.
He is very anal retentive, just graduated from a top law school at 25, obsessed with getting ahead - and never thinks anything he does is good enough. But this is one of the main reasons I love him. He's a typical Cap and i LOVE and respect Cap's....
(Re the following)
Emotionally
they didn't have much time to develop as children and apparently they could have had excessive mothering...
This is SO dead on...his mother and sisters - I love them dearly but they have done EVERYTHING for him.. He's spoiled beyond repair!! My Taurus sun is very possessive but so is he. (He's Taurus rising) As unsympathetic he can seem because of the strong Cap influence he gets very jealous but hates to admit it. But he is VERY loyal.
Funny how all of you are right. Our relationship is great 90% of the time but when we're upset with each other, we're rivals!!! But I recognize that alot has to do with my immediate reaction to the things he says (I'm uber defensive). And i will stand my ground even when I know it's not logical. He on the other hand is logical to a fault and has a hard time regognizing why I may be emotional about some things (this could be just a man thing). And I must acknowledge he is always the one to call me while I'm being taurean like not calling him to prove a point (immature I know, but I cant help it!!!! - working on it)
We've both definitley grown alot and deal with our problems more maturely....Anyways I hope to marry him so I'll have to toughen up!!!! Just wanted some honest opinions. Thank you all!!!
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