*L* I thought that with that group you could, particularly because BW has gone there in the past. I think in that particular case it was mostly an issue of the OP still being caught up in their emotional turmoil of the issue and therefore being unable to actually discuss it. Which kept bring things to a wall.

When I post a response like "professional dress is all about nuances and degrees" and get a sarcastic remark of "oh, so I should just wear whatever I want and lose my job as a result?" [paraphrasing there] it's a sign to me that either the person has the worst reading comprehension skills evah, or they're an otherwise nice person who is just too emotional to consider other points. When I twice offer to take time and share some advice on the How part of the equation, but those offers aren't acknowledged and the person continues to aggressively state "don't just say change without saying how" [again paraphrasing] I take that as a sign that the answers aren't really wanted and my time would be better spent elsewhere.

I think she asked for advice and discussion, but was really needing sympathy and comfort instead. Which is ok too, but is less frustrating if it is made clear. :)