Ok, maybe the movie didn't suck. Maybe it's just that its not remotely what I was sold. You saw the movie stills and maybe a preview, right? You saw the faun? And the fairies? Rather like a dark fairy tale, yes?
Well....sure. For about 10-15% of the movie. This movie was about 1 part Labyrinth and 9 parts The Diary of Anne Frank. It's a war story. Make no mistake. It's all about the events immediately following the end of the Spanish Civil War. In fact, it's more about the guerrillas who fought against some radical military men than it is about the little girl who the movie pretends to revolve around. Yes, she interacts with the fairly tale stuff you may have seen, but realistically, if you've seen a preview you've seen all of the fairy tale part of the film. The rest of it is very dark and unnecessarily brutal and violent.
And it has subtitles. Not that that makes it suck. I just want you to be prepared if you're going to go see it. The guy sitting in front of me had a frizzy ass do that I wanted to shave so I could better read the damn movie.
So...yeah. I'm not saying don't go see this. I'm not saying Go, but if you do, I just want you to know that it's NOT what it's being billed as. It's a war movie. If you want to see a war movie with an occasional fairy flitting about and a cool looking faun, (sometimes that mood strikes you, right?) then by all means go see Pan's Labyrinth.
Me, I'd rather have gone to see Eragon even knowing it sucks.
Well....sure. For about 10-15% of the movie. This movie was about 1 part Labyrinth and 9 parts The Diary of Anne Frank. It's a war story. Make no mistake. It's all about the events immediately following the end of the Spanish Civil War. In fact, it's more about the guerrillas who fought against some radical military men than it is about the little girl who the movie pretends to revolve around. Yes, she interacts with the fairly tale stuff you may have seen, but realistically, if you've seen a preview you've seen all of the fairy tale part of the film. The rest of it is very dark and unnecessarily brutal and violent.
And it has subtitles. Not that that makes it suck. I just want you to be prepared if you're going to go see it. The guy sitting in front of me had a frizzy ass do that I wanted to shave so I could better read the damn movie.
So...yeah. I'm not saying don't go see this. I'm not saying Go, but if you do, I just want you to know that it's NOT what it's being billed as. It's a war movie. If you want to see a war movie with an occasional fairy flitting about and a cool looking faun, (sometimes that mood strikes you, right?) then by all means go see Pan's Labyrinth.
Me, I'd rather have gone to see Eragon even knowing it sucks.
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Los Angeles
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Re: Pan's Labyrinth
Sat, January 6, 2007 - 4:14 PMNow I can see how you would have that opinion. However, I myself will respectfully disagree and call this one of the very best films of the year.
To me this was one of the most fully realized depictions of a fairy tale committed to screen. They got everything right. Fairy tales in their very nature are dark and full of ghoulish creatures but are often not as terrifying as the real life situations in which they take place, such as war. Pan's Labyrinth is just that and demonstrates how such a beautifully rendered fantasy world can be dark and scary and not always trustworthy but is still a respite from the true darkness of the human world.
In classic tradition, the faun is a trickster, perfectly portrayed here as a demon of either good or bad, but not fully known. The three quests (3 is a classic number in fantasy lore) are each more dangerous than the next and also prove that no matter how horrible your imagination might be, the monsters are not as scary as real world ones can be.
This is a war-torn film, full of brutal battles, political intrigue, history, brothers and sisters fighting for each other (another common fairy tale theme), dark family members and the overriding sense that something bigger, something almost too fantastic to believe is at foot. Sure, the fantastic creatures and plots are a small physical part of the story, but they add the flavor to a rich pageant of war and survival.
The way the storylines are brought together in a surprising and powerful way only heightens the relevance of the story and shows that fairy tales are ultimately adult stories that have been ultimately co-opted for kids, who often have no place in a very adult world of war and strife.
This is a beautiful film, heartbreaking, gorgeous, dark, scary and and dream like.
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Re: Pan's Labyrinth
Sat, January 6, 2007 - 4:23 PMA good review, but the less you know going in is probably best...
www.salon.com/ent/movies/...h/index.html -
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Re: Pan's Labyrinth
Tue, March 6, 2007 - 8:15 AMSome guy named Tristan felt cpmpelled to email his review of this film. And you'll see by reading it why I felt compelled to repost it is Things That Suck. Clearly this guys does.
message
From
tristan
0
tristan (no connection)
Washington
Date Mon, March 5, 2007 - 10:15 PM
Subject response to pans labyrinth review
Message hi, i just spent the last minute logging into this shitty website to tell you that your a fucking idiot. Pans Labyrinth was a horribly depressing piece of shit film you stupid fuckin pirate ass raper. I mean, they kill the little girl in the end... what a fucking downer! My god, i saw a review that said, "don't take a depressed friend to this movie", holy shit they're right. My god, the movie is so cold; partway through the movie i just started counting the number of torture scenes in it... total unecessary bullshit! I couldnt figure out why the writers of the movie were so angry at this little girl! I mean they were really fucking around with her. First, they killed off her mom, then they have her threatened by her asshole stepfather, then they kill the little bitch... what the fuck?!! I expected to see something akin to the movie "Brazil", which is what a real fantasy, modern day fairytale is supposed to be like... and guess what... no little girls get blow away with a gun!! I mean, what the fuck you cock sucking donkey ass raping hobbo shit sucking cock gobbler think your doing supporting this piece of fucking shit film? It is like a documentary of ann franks journy through hell... maybe in the past fairytales were dark and depressing and made everybody who read them feel like shit but thats because the world fucking sucked back then!! Kids married at 13, and died of a disease when they were 40!!! LIfe fucking sucked, and dark and depressing old fuckers wrote depressing stories because they didn't know anything else asides from fucking a whore at a local brothel for twenty shillilngs, or who knows how much it was to fuck a whore in the past... you know what the exchange rate was? Anyways you cock sucking pirate, Fairy tales now are something that allows people to actually escape the fucking real world... what a concept!! I dont want to see no fucking spanish dick head marching around with a gun killing other spanish assholes, and then seeing some cunt general bash some guys head in with a wine bottle because he was out hunting rabbits!! Fuck that, as Scarface would say, fuck that!! I mean, there is something to be said about watching a supposed fantasy film that has more violence in it than Scarface... that can't be good... i mean, i saw the first two Saw movies, and I would easily say that Pans Labyrinth had as much if not more graphic torture scenes than both saw 1 and 2 combined... i mean, fuck!! She cuts the fucking guys mouth open and stabbed him a million times in the back???????? And for somereason they gratuitously showed him sewing his face back together? And the part where the medic hacks through the leg of the spanish rebel? What the FUCK was the point!? It added nothing more to the movie than making me think... well, I guess that guy got really fucked up. What a depressing pile of shit that movie was and... honest to god, go fuck yourself for thinking it was a good movie you fucking cunt, and dont send me a message back... -
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Re: Pan's Labyrinth
Tue, March 6, 2007 - 9:34 AMOh please please PLEASE let me send the letter back with red ink on all the spelling and grammar mistakes. And paragraphs, Tristan! PARAGRAPHS!! -
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Re: Pan's Labyrinth
Tue, March 6, 2007 - 9:40 AMYou know what it's missing? It's missing Biblical references. All the best nutcase rants have Biblical references.
For example:
Pans Labyrinth was a horribly depressing piece of shit film (Gal 12: 4-6) you stupid fuckin pirate ass raper (Gen 4:12). I mean, they kill the little girl in the end... (Rev 1:14, Rev 2:4-7) what a fucking downer! My god (Est 2:12-14), i saw a review that said, "don't take a depressed friend to this movie", holy shit they're right. My god (Corin 14:2-6), the movie is so cold (John 4:12-20); partway through the movie i just started counting the number of torture scenes in it... (Paul 5:7-9) total unecessary bullshit! (Rev 5:12-14)
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Re: Pan's Labyrinth
Tue, March 6, 2007 - 9:40 AMWow, such eloquence is so rarely seen in a movie review.
"...cock sucking donkey ass raping hobbo shit sucking cock gobbler" I think this will be my new pet name for you.
He did realize this wasn't real, right? He seemed to take it all so personally.
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Re: Pan's Labyrinth
Tue, March 6, 2007 - 9:39 AMNow THATS fucked up. He could have disagreed with you without all the hateful comments.
I got a similar "hate email" from a tribe user once. I had posted a listing about my faux fur costumes and got an angry letter from an idiot woman who was outraged that I was harming little animals for fashion and that I should be ashamed of myself. Never underestimate another person's stupidity. That is why I now capitalize the word "faux" and add in "synthetic fur" so that I can weed out the moderately stupid and just deal with the intensely dumb. Its the latter that I like to have fun with. -
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Re: Pan's Labyrinth
Tue, March 6, 2007 - 9:52 AMOh, cut the shit Deb! We all know just how many muppets had to die for your little coat factory. That's a wild northeastern Grover pelt in your main pic for God's sake! -
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Re: Pan's Labyrinth
Tue, March 6, 2007 - 10:24 AMOk Tim. Let me set your ass straight right now. No muppets were killed for my coats you butt muncher. I use only the finest pelts from select faux farms and nauga ranches in the US. All fauxs and naugas are hand fed and humanely harvested. It is a little known fact that faux's and naugas re-grow a new coat every 6-8 months and the old coat is shed in sheet like pelts which can be pieced together to produce large bolts of faux fur and naugahyde. Many farmers have increased their pelt output by using super foods and high potency vitamins so that shedding/harvesting happens every 8-12 weeks.
And the fur that I am wearing is NOT a Grover Pelt, nimrod, but it is the fur of the northwestern wild snipe which was hunted and killed for the meat - snipe farms are illegal. -
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Re: Pan's Labyrinth
Tue, March 6, 2007 - 10:32 AMthere is tangible proof, sad to say, that faux fur is from orphaned or stray puppies. boo!
as for the hateful message, he didn't have to give away the entire story!! that in itself is rude!!
shame. -
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Re: Pan's Labyrinth
Tue, March 6, 2007 - 10:40 AM<"there is tangible proof, sad to say, that faux fur is from orphaned or stray puppies. boo!">
Not my faux fur.
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Re: Pan's Labyrinth
Tue, March 6, 2007 - 10:52 AMnot if it looks like the hat you're sporting there! i just read a blurb on the faux fur...still sad. but i'm sure boas and foo-foo hats are safe from ridicule. -
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This is the maximum depth. Additional responses will not be threaded.
Re: Pan's Labyrinth
Tue, March 6, 2007 - 11:12 AMI make all my own stuff so its pretty darn obvious (when you look at the knit backing of the raw fabric) that is synthetic acrylic. I have read about Nordstroms (was it them?) who sold faux fur coats that were really dog fur - they did not know when they purchased the garments - so I hear. That does suck. But rest assured, I do NOT suck when it comes to the furries I make.
A good test with furry stuff.....pull out some fibers and hold it (with tweezers) over a lighter or lit match. If it singes like your hair would, its real fur. If it melts and/or smells like plastic, its synthetic.
Now that we totally hijacked this thread..... -
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Re: Pan's Labyrinth
Tue, March 6, 2007 - 11:22 AMNow that we totally hijacked this thread.....
another one bites the dust!
it was just a tad depressing. i loved the movie.
in fact, my friends and i were ushered in to the theater by some 14 year old brace-face girl. place was already dark, film was already rolling, and we're like "what the hell, it's not supposed to start for another 20 mins!?" we went in laughing and happy and took our seats. that's when i realized that she let us in with 10 minutes of the previous showing still going on!! we just fucked up the ending for about 25 people at the worst possible time (if you've seen the movie you know the last 10 minutes are intense sadness). we shut up, movie ends, and everyone exiting the theater was shooting us nasty looks. sucked for us too because we knew the ending.
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Unsu...
Re: Pan's Labyrinth
Tue, March 6, 2007 - 6:49 PMlol
"I expected to see something akin to the movie "Brazil", which is what a real fantasy, modern day fairytale is supposed to be like"
So wait,, he thought Brazil was an uplifting fairytale???
man..
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Re: Pan's Labyrinth
Fri, March 9, 2007 - 12:34 PMHere's some fun... take parts of this email and post it into the preview window on the site: cingular.myveepers.com/cingul...wveeper
It's fin to hear the buddha say "what the BEEP you cock sucking donkey ass raping hobbo BEEP sucking cock gobbler think your doing supporting this piece of fucking BEEP"
And yes they convert "fuck" to "beep" but not "fucking."
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Re: Pan's Labyrinth
Fri, June 29, 2007 - 9:05 AMI ended up hating this movie - it ended up, for me an attempt to blur the line between things that engaged you because they repulsed and things that engaged you because they were beautiful and fascinating.
