I'd love to thank the party attendee(s) who found it in great taste to remove one of my sons large pumpkins from my porch and smash it in the street behind the big rig......

Excellent

Next year you can stay home, we may be trashy, but we're not rude, we don't throw fits over gifts, leave early in a fit and pout or take property that isn't yours and make a mess of it. (yes, rules will be changed for next year so no one goes home pouting in such a fit after the overly lengthy gift enchange that we all suffered through damn, a fist fight woulda been better entertainment for fucks sake! ;) )

However, a VERY special thank you to all of our guests who were the light of the night, who played nice, participated and had a good time with us for the one night of the year we open our home to our friends and company. For you, I say thank you, without you I would have been sad.