Ah, I've already found an error in this new Eightfold Path.
We must delete, "I will not beg." Begging is essential,
for without it, a person can truly degrade themselves
enough to be discredited enough to be a scoundrel.

Sevenfold Vows (Rewrite)

I will not lie. Mooching is much more fun when you can be up front about it. I will not cheat. It's a drag to have to cheat. It's good if you can get everything free and still follow the rules. I will not pretend. It's too much work to fake anything. True slackerhood means being supported just the rotten way that you are. I will not steal. Stealing only validates the authorities' view of Scoundrelism. It's best to actually be entitled to all one mooches. I will not borrow. Borrowing fits in with the old work ethic system. Here the idea is to concede that we don't deserve luxurious lives as raw gifts. Screw debt. I want freebies to be free, not something I have to work to pay off later. I will not pay. This is a hard one, and it may take many lives of hard practice to arrive at that place where one can be a Buddha of absolute freebie-ism. There is still the temptation to earn money and pay for stuff. I will not work. Of course work is actually a moral sin, however, it is deeply ingrained in us, so we have to accept that it may be many thousands of lifetimes before we are ready to hold our heads high and say, "No way I'm taking that fuckin' job, ever."