*
Steve Zissou: We'll split into two groups. I'll take Ned, Ogata, and Wolodarsky.
Klaus Daimler: [pouting] Thanks. Thanks a lot for not picking me.

*
Ned Plimpton: I'm gonna fight you, Steve.
[Steve hits Ned in the face]
Steve Zissou: You never say, "I'm gonna fight you, Steve." You just smile and act natural, and then you sucker-punch.
Ned Plimpton: You fight your way, and I'll fight mine.
Steve Zissou: Oh, listen, Ned. Don't you try to…
[Ned hits Steve in the face]
Steve Zissou: I think your Team Zissou ring might've caught me on the lip.

*
Klaus Daimler: So, you really think you're a Zissou.
Ned Plimpton: I don't know.
Klaus Daimler: Well, you traveled a long way for "I don't know," sonny.
Ned Plimpton: That's true. But it's important to me.
Klaus Daimler: Yeah? Well, there are a lot of things that are important to some people around here, sonny.
Ned Plimpton: Klaus, don't call me "sonny."
Klaus Daimler: And one more thing: It's the Steve Zissou show, not the Ned show.
[Klaus slaps Ned in the face]
Klaus Daimler: You hear me?
Ned Plimpton: Yes, I do.
[Klaus starts walking away]
Ned Plimpton: Klaus?
Klaus Daimler: Ja?
Ned Plimpton: If you ever touch me again, I will kick your goddamn teeth out. Is *that* understood?
Klaus Daimler: Not if I don't see you first, sonny.

*
Alistair Hennessey: You're the most ravishing creature that I've ever seen in my life.
Eleanor Zissou: Hello Skinny.
Alistair Hennessey: Hello Eleanor.
Eleanor Zissou: Is that a new merit badge?
Alistair Hennessey: Oh, yeah, as a matter of fact it is. I just became a Knight in Portugal, the Presidente gave a special ball...
Steve Zissou: Don't be nice to Ali, he's my nemesis.

A magical moment (among many!):

Crew Guy (I really should know his name): It was working okay until late last night but now the whole tracking system has gone completely on the fritz.

Steve: Screw it. We'll sell it for scrap along with the boat and the sumbarine. I'm goin home.

(walks down hall)

Ned: Let's take up the whirlybird and see what we find out there anyway. I got a feelin we can spot this fish from a hundred n eleven feet up.

Steve: Ned, I don't even know if I saw the bastard.

Ned: I have $275,000 invested in this damn production. Something ate Esteban, didn't it? Now LEAD! Right? (puts hand up for the "go team" gesture," but Steve doesn't put his hand up right away) right... oh! (puts hand up again, Steve does it this time...)
*********
Ok! If you watch, in the background, Klaus has come in and is watching the scene, and when Steve finally puts his hand in for the "go team", Klaus does it with them, but off in the distance... :) love that guy...

We're smack in the middle
of a lightning-strike rescue op, Klaus.



- What's the deal?
- I'm sick of being on "B" Squad.



Listen. You may be on "B" Squad,
but you're the "B" Squad leader.



Don't you know me and Esteban
always thought of you as our baby brother?



I've always thought of
you two as my dads.



Please don't let anyone
make fun of me for saying so.



I can't guarantee that,
Klausie, but I'll try.

What would be the scientific purpose of killing it?

Revenge.


ORRR...
________________________________

Wait. Hold it.
Is that a distress bark?
Is something wounded out there?
We quickly locate the source of the mysterious cry.

What is she, Steve?

A wild snow mongoose.
We thought they were extinct.
Her ankle's broken.

OOOORRRRRR...
___________________________

Son of a bitch, I'm sick of these dolphins.
Quiet out there tonight.
Can you hear the jack-whales singing?

Beautiful. I wonder what they're saying.

Well, that was the sludge tanker over there, but -
There you go. That's them.


OOOOOOOORRRRRRR....(okay...so i found the script online..)
________________
I strung it on some peppermint dental floss...
in case you wanna wear it like a necklace.


OORRRR....
_______________

Those fucking amateurs.
You left your dog, you idiots.

OOORRR...
_____

We're being led on an illegal suicide mission by a selfish maniac.

I hear what you're saying, but I think you misjudge the guy.


(I like this movie...)
_________________________

No. I can't give you full credit, but I'm not gonna flunk you either.
You're all getting incompletes.

This is bullshit.


__________________________

Oh, shit. Swamp leeches.
Everybody, check for swamp leeches, and pull them off.
Nobody else got hit? I'm the only one? What's the deal?


_________________________

Wolodarsky, go get the keys to that fishing boat, and throw them in the water.

No, wait. They might have another set. Just blow it up.

____________________________

Oh, no. We forgot Cody. We gotta go back.



Good-bye, Cody.


_________________________

This is the first time Eleanor's ever cried in front of me as long as I've known her.
Except for once when she got her arm caught in the deck winch.

___________________________

Is this my espresso machine? Wh-What is - How did you get my espresso machine?

Well, uh...we fuckin' stole it, man.


_____________________________

You still want to blow him up?

No. We're out of dynamite anyway.

________________

now i want to watch it again....